What? Me again already? The Webmaster leaves me out of Dark for nine battles, then puts me in twice in a row?
THIS is not a BATTLE!
What? This is an extra?
THIS has something to do with your DEFEAT of DEVEN and JESSIE!
Ah yes, Team Rocket. They never learn, do they?
TEAM ROCKET have never LEARNT and will never LEARN!
But despite this, they own DARK VERSION!
Not if I have anything to do about it!
HOLYGARY has NOTHING to DO about IT!
What? I'm gonna take them down!
HOLYGARY is UNDERESTIMATING TEAM ROCKET!
Team Rocket are a bunch of spineless theives, and not very good ones at that! I wish I could take out all of them right now!
NARRATOR is making a PHONE CALL!
Who to?
BOSS appeared!
FLUNKIES appeared!
BUTCH & CASSIDY appeared!
25 MALE BLACKSUITS appeared!
25 FEMALE BLACKSUITS appeared!
TEAM ROCKET wants to FIGHT!
The Webmaster is bored again, isn't he?
WEBMASTER is BORED!
Thought so. Everybody out!
Go, PIDGEY, GEODUDE, RATTADUDE, ALAKAZAM, SWORD, MSDARKDEX!
This isn't going to be enough to take out that many...
NARRATOR feels MERCIFUL!
Enemy EVOLUMANa appears!
Enemy CRANKY BOB appears!
INNOCENT BYSTANDER appears!
But... these are all my enemies too! Except the civilian... Never heard of him...
They are ALSO enemies of TEAM ROCKET!
Okay... Guys, I suppose we could ally on this one?
EVOLUMANa grudgingly allies!
CRANKY BOB crankily allies!
BYSTANDR willingly allies!
SCREEN goes blank!
KAPPA slowly walks onto the screen!
Now... we will show you how this War Event works... War event? Hold on...
KAPPA checks SCRIPT!
POKEBATTLES? What am I doing here? I'm supposed to be helping the guys in Final Fantasy VI! Forget you, I'm out of here...
KAPPA ran away!
...
Oh well...
NARRATOR picks up SCRIPT!
The War Event is like a large-scale tournament. The four players will be seperated. Each character must first defeat a single Rocket extra. Then they must defeat two at a time. After that, they will be allowed to team up in groups of two, of their choice. After that they will face members of Team Rocket of increasing numbers and skill, before joining forces and finally reaching and battling the boss. Do you understand?
Yes.
ALLIES say YES!
Then let the battling begin!
SCENE fades!
 

Player: Garrett the Holy

TR EXTRA appeared!
TRXTRA wants to fight!
Alright... I choose the Sword...
Enemy TRXTRA sent out DIGLETT!
Decapitate!
DIGLETT used DIG!
DIGLETT's HEAD went underground!
RUSTSWORD used DECAPITATE!
The attack missed!
RUSTSWORD kept going and crashed!
Enemy TRXTRA was DECAPITATED!
Whoa... that was quick...
Enemy TRXTRA sent out EKANS!
Enemy TRXTRA died!
Enemy EKANS and DIGLETT will AVENGE their master's DEATH!
Sure you will, guys. Wouldn't you prefer to join me?
Enemy EKANS and DIGLETT wouldn't!
Too bad... I'll just have to capture you then! Rust spore!
RUSTSWORD used RUST SPORE!
RUST SPORE is only effective on METALLIC ITEMS!
Oh yeah...
Enemy EKANS used POISON STING!
It didn't affect RUSTSWORD!
Enemy DIGLETT used SCRATCH!
Some RUST was SCRATCHED OFF!
Scratch? Ha! Let me show you how it's done. Slash!
SWORD hit DIGLETT!
RUST caused SWORD to TEAR through DIGLETT like a SAW!
DIGLETT really doesn't look too good!
DIGLETT fainted!
EKANS used BITE!
It's not very effective!
Hit it with the flat side to stun it!
RUSTSWORD used FLAT SIDE BLOW!
It's super effective!
EKANS was FLATTENED!
Not bad...
HOLYGARY is, perhaps, FORGETTING that SWORD is REALLY REALLY REALLY BIG?
True. Pokeball go!
HOLYGARY used POKEBALL!
TRAINER blocked the ball!
Aaah! He's alive! A headless zombie!
Actually it's because EKANS slithered under TRXTRA's arm!
Oh. Wreck all my fun.
EKANS ran away pulling along TRXTRA!
HOLYGARY wins!
 

TRXTRA wants to fight!
Enemy TRXTRA sent out KOFFING!
Err... I just realised I don't have any pokemon...
PIKACHUa fell from SKY!
PIKACHUa landed on KOFFING!
KOFFING spewed POISONOUS GAS!
My Pikachu! At last!
EVOLUMANa rescued PIKACHUa from GAS!
PIKACHUa says HI!
Now... let's show that stupid TR agent...
PIKACHU used WIRING!
PIKACHU plugged KOFFING's HOLES with WIRES!
PIKACHU pushed PLUNGER!
KOFFING blew up!
Enemy TRXTRA is ENRAGED!
Enemy TRXTRA wants to fight!
Alright then... Return Pikachu. I'll take care of this myself.
Go, EVOLUMANa!
Thunderpunch!
EVOLUMANa punched TRXTRA!
Yeah... where's the thunder?
Oh... hold on a minute...
NARRATOR is WRITING!
Enemy TRXTRA is getting impatient!
Here we are! STORY MODE!
    As the battle unfolded into a simple fistfight, the empty black void in which these battles were meant to be held suddenly seemed to light up. Both fighters looked around, stunned, suddenly finding they were suspended on a huge spire, with a large circular platform they were standing on suggesting either a much taller spire had been there earlier and been cut off at that point, or that the Narrator simply didn't have time to think up a better battleground.
    Thunder boomed and lightning crackled eerily in the eternally dark, cloudfilled place that was this area of Dark Version - Dark because, well, it's Dark Version and cloudfilled because the thunder was the only reason this story mode section is being included - crackling ever closer and threatening to hit the two combatants as they each attempted to punch and kick the other into fainting or (Hello?) falling down the huge drop that surrounded (Hello?!) the arena. Neither of them appeared to be (Excuse me...) Gaining much of an advantage in the (Narr-) WHAT?! I'm trying to tell the story here!
We get the picture. Couldn't we go back to Battle Mode now?
    No! You asked for it.
    Now, anyway, the two broke off for a moment, facing each other, and the Evolution Man decided to take a risk. He waved his hands, and let loose with his trademark move upon his opponent - Evolve.
Alright, now we're going back to battle mode, okay?
Right. Evolve!
EVOLUMANa used EVOLVE!
Enemy TRXTRA evolved into TRSUPERIOR!
Enemy TRSUPERIOR is SHOCKED!
EVOLUMANa used PUSH!
Enemy TRSUPERIOR was PUSHED off CLIFF!
Now! Great ball, catch him!
EVOLUMANa used GREAT BALL!
...
Enemy TRSUPERIOR was CAPTURED!
Give nickname to TRSUPERIOR?
Hmmm... TRHOSTAGE!
TRSUPERIOR was renamed TRHOSTAGE!
EVOLUMANa WINS!
 

TRXTRA wants to fight!
Urrh... Fight this.
CRANKY BOB pulled out a SHOTGUN!
TRXTRA thinks he has the wrong person!
TRXTRA ran away!
CRANKY BOB wins!
...
...
NARRATOR thinks that doesn't count as a BATTLE!
BATTLE must be at least TWENTY LINES LONG!
CRANKY BOB points SHOTGUN at NARRATOR!
NARRATOR has a sudden memory of BLACK VERSION's first NARRATOR!
NARRATOR realizes that it's not really a BATTLE! It doesn't matter!
NARRATOR shuts up!

Player: Innocent Bystander

TRXTRA wants to fight!
Ha! I'll fight fire with fire then. I choose Jamesa!
JAMESa, GO!
Enemy TRXTRA sent out KOFFING!
JAMESa sent out WEEZING!
WEEZING thinks TWO HEADS ARE BETTER THAN ONE and THREE HEADS are EVEN BETTER!
WEEZING wants KOFFING to join JAMES!
KOFFING agrees!
TRXTRA curses!
TRXTRA sent out TRXTRA!
KOFFING and WEEZING use BOUNCE!
KOFFING and WEEZING are BOUNCING on TRXTRA's HEAD!
It's super amusing!
TRXTRA runs away crying!
WEEZING used ACID!
ACID missed!
TRXTRA got away!
BYSTANDR wins!

War event #1 Battle #5:  0%
Player: Garrett the Holy  [Record: 9:6:2]  Last Battle: Win vs. Team Rocket (WE Battle #1)

TRXTRAs want to fight!
Fools... didn't you see what happened to your friend?
TRXTRAs didn't particularly like that TRXTRA!
TRXTRAs were actually planning on THANKING YOU!
Hey, cool!
But TRHONOR demands they AVENGE his death!
Typical. Geodude, Rattadude, go.
TRXTRAs sent out SPEAROW and MANKEY!
Use your Impress attack!
GEODUDE flexed his ARMS!
RATTADUDE showed off his SUNNIES!
SPEAROW was UNAFFECTED!
MANKEY is IMPRESSED!
Wouldn't you prefer to work with us?
MANKEY will ALLY with WHOEVER wins this FIGHT!
Better than nothing, I suppose.
SPEAROW calls MANKEY a TRAITOR!
SPEAROW wants to fight!
Bring it on. Geodude, Rock throw!
GEODUDE is looking for a ROCK to throw at SPEAROW!
SPEAROW called for help!
HELP is coming!
GEODUDE found a ROCK!
Good! Throw it!
ROCK is TWO FEET in DIAMETER!
GEODUDE is trying to PICK UP the ROCK!
SPEAROW appeared!
SPEAROW allied with SPEAROW!
GEODUDE threw the ROCK!
SPEAROW was HIT!
Other SPEAROW avoided the attack!
Damn... nearly got two birds with one stone...
STONE comes back down!
Hey, I might yet!
STONE crushes MANKEY!
MANKEY died!
So much for allies. Mega punch!
GEODUDE used MEGA PUNCH!
ROCK was PUNCHED!
Not the rock... the Spearow...
ROCK flew into the air!
SPEAROW was HIT!
SPEAROW is still flying...
ROCK fell!
ROCK hit TRXTRAS!
TRXTRAS fainted!
Are you gonna stick around, spearow?
SPEAROW ran away!
HOLYGARY wins!

War Event #1 Battle #6:  0%
Player: Da Evolution Mana  [Record: 1:1:0]  Last Battle: Win vs. TR (WE Battle #2)

TRXTRAs want to fight!
Two of you now? Pikachu, you know what to do.
TRXTRAs sent out SANDSHREW and DIGLETT!
You're just doing this to annoy me, aren't you Narrator?
NARRATOR suggests you pay attention to the battle!
SANDSHREW used SCRATCH!
DIGLETT dug a hole!
Jump!
PIKACHU jumped!
SANDSHREW missed!
DIGLETT used DIG!
DIGLETT hit SANDSHREW!
Hah... Pikachu, Swift!
Enemy SANDSHREW used SAND ATTACK!
PIKACHU was SWIFTLY blinded!
Oh no...
DIGLETT used EARTHQUAKE!
PIKACHU fainted!
I was hoping I wouldn't have to do this... Pokeball go!
TRHOSTAGE go!
TRXTRAs gasp!
Now, you're going to return your pokemon and faint of your own accord or he gets it!
DIGLETT and SANDSHREW were returned!
TRXTRAs fainted!
Ha... that was pathetic... return.
TRHOSTAGE, return!
Hmm... I think I'll take their pokemon too... It's not a crime to steal from theives, is it?
EVOLUMANa took POKEMON!
EVOLUMANa wins!

War Event #1 Battle #7:  0%
Player: Cranky Bob  [Record: 1:1:0]  Last Battle: Win vs. TR (WE Battle #3)

TRXTRAs want to fight!
TRXTRA wants to fight!
Urrh?
TRXTRA from the first battle!
Shotgun...
CRANKYBOB is a man of few words!
Narrator... listen...
CRANKYBOB whispers something to NARRATOR!
Err... The few words CRANKYBOB says are worth listening to!
Shotgun.
NARRATOR edges away from CRANKYBOB!
CRANKYBOB sent out SHOTGUN!
Enemy TRXTRAs' ENTHUSIASM greatly fell!
Whack.
CRANKYBOB whacked TRXTRAs with SHOTGUN!
Enemy TRXTRAs were cut!
Enemy TRXTRAs don't remember a KNIFE being on the SHOTGUN!
NARRATOR put it there!
TRXTRAs start complaining
NARRATOR whispers to TRXTRAs what CRANKYBOB whispered to NARRATOR!
Enemy TRXTRAs understand!
You too.
Enemy TRXTRAs fainted from fear!
CRANKYBOB wins!
Heh.

War Event #1 Battle #8:  0%
Player: Innocent Bystander  [Record: 0:0:1]  Last Battle: Win vs. TR(WE Battle #4)

TRXTRAs want to fight!
TRXTRAs sent out KOFFING and EKANS!
Ah yes... the traditional poison duo...
TRXTRAs say to STOP being POETIC and FIGHT!
Sigh... Jamesa, go... Bring out your pokemon.
GO, JAMESa!
JAMESa used SENDOUT!
WEEZING was SENTOUT!
VICTREEBELL was SENTOUT!
KOFFING was SENTOUT!
Enemy KOFFING and EKANS look DUBIOUS!
Koffing, Weezing, Smog.
KOFFING and WEEZING used SMOG!
Enemy KOFFING and EKANS are unaffected!
That's 'cos it wasn't aimed at them.
TRXTRAs can't see!
TRXTRAs are having BREATHING DIFFICULTY!
Jamesa, whine. Victreebell, Razor Leaf.
JAMESa used WHINE!
JAMESa stepped back from the battle!
JAMESa produced a bottle of WINE and GLASSES!
JAMESa started DRINKING WINE!
JAMESa is actually looking DIGNIFIED!
James... dignified?
IBYSTANDR's SENSE of REALITY was greatly SHAKEN!
NARRATOR's SENSE of REALITY was greatly SHAKEN!
VICTREEBELL used RAZOR LEAF!
WINE BOTTLE was cut in HALF!
WINE GLASS was cut in HALF!
Hey, you're supposed to attack them, not James...
IBYSTANDR should pay more attention to the ANIME!
JAMESa was covered with WINE!
TRUNIFORM was STAINED RED!
What? JAMESa is evolving!
JAMESa evolved into RED ROCKET JIM!
Err... does this have any effect on him?
NARRATOR doesn't KNOW!
VICTREEBELL used PEOPLEEATER!
VICTREEBELL swallowed RRJIM up to the WAIST!
VICTREEBELL sucked up a lot of WINE!
VICTREEBELL evolved into DRUNCINBELL!
Alright... this battle is just getting weird now... I think I'll stand back and let them deal with it...
DRUNCINBELL let go of RRJIM!
DRUNCINBELL used HAZE!
Enemy KOFFING and EKANS's VISION became HAZY!
Enemy KOFFING and EKANS's VISIBILITY greatly fell!
RRJIM used MANIC ATTACK!
RRJIM started SWINGING EKANS around!
Enemy KOFFING used POISON GAS!
KOFFING and WEEZING are UNAFFECTED!
RRJIM's ATTACK continued!
Enemy EKANS was THROWN at KOFFING with INCREDIBLE FORCE!
It's super effective!
Enemy EKANS is in KOFFING's MOUTH!
POISONGAS can't escape!
KOFFING gets BIGGER!
KOFFING gets BIGGER!
KOFFING is stretched to LIMIT!
If LIMIT is stretched FURTHER it will BREAK!
And...
KOFFING was stretched further!
KOFFING used LIMIT BREAK!
Uh-oh...
KOFFING exploded in a mass of POISONOUS GAS and MUCK!
EKANS fainted!
TRXTRAs fainted!
IBYSTANDR was affected!
IBYSTANDR WINS!