Battle #32
Battle #32 introduces one of my partners-in-crime with celloing to White Version.

Battle #32 June 11th, 2000
The Un-origanality of Tree Battling

Player: Kelly (No Record)


KELLY is walking with Ally BOB!

Bob my cello mind you.

Do YOU think NARRATOR really CARES?

Probably not...but we're totally against Mary and her cello, Bill!

KELLY obviously doesn't read WHITEVERSIONBATTLES!

Huh?

MARY is now DACTA MPR!
BILL is no longer DACTA MPR's cello!
BILL is BILL "THAT CELLO" SMITH, an INDEPENDENT cello that FIGHTS against EVIL!

Looking at these battles, Bill doesn't fight for anything, he's just a big pest...

NARRATOR snatches BATTLEFILES from KELLY!

Hmph. You're just fickle, that's all.

KELLY is right!
TREE appeared!

It says here White Version has a lack of origanality...I can see that clearly too.

KELLY shouldn't listen to KEVDUDE all the TIME!

Whatever...

TREE wants to fight!

What if we decided not to fight?

Then KELLY and Ally BOB would have to be KILLED!

Uh, ok? I'll fight then. Bob, go!

Go, Ally BOB!
TREE sent out TREE!
TREE used FALL!
APPLES fell on KELLY!

Why can't it be pears?

Because that's just the way it is!
Ally BOB used BOB!
Ally BOB is BOBBING for APPLES!
Ally BOB took APPLES away from TREE!

That makes the tree sorta defenseless, doesn't it?

Not NESSISARILY!
What? TREE is evolving!
TREE evolved to PEACHTREE!

Notice it's not pear tree? This Narrator is against me...

For once, KELLY is RIGHT!
PEACHTREE used PUNCH!
PEACHTREE punched KELLY!

How can it punch, it doesn't have arms!

KELLY has a POINT!
But then again, BOB doesn't have LEGS!
But for the sake of POKEBATTLES...
PEACHTREE disappeared!

At least that's over...Trees are stupid to battle against...

PEOPLE from BLUEVERSION don't agree!

Tough!

NARRATOR hears MOTHER calling DINNER!
NARRATOR ran away!
KELLY won against NARRATOR!

Somehow I don't find this fair to the Narrator...

At least you won!

How can you still be here?

Don't ask questions! Just smile and accept the win!
KELLY smiled!
KELLY won!

Wa-hoo
?

Battle #33 June 13th, 2000
Fieldy's Fan
Player: Fieldy Fan (No REAL Record...but she did lose against Max and Elly)


YEAH, FIELDY!!!
FIELDYFAN realizes she's NOT in a KORNCONCERT!
MOTHER thinks that KORN has OBSCENE LYRICS anyway!
Huh...Like I care.
LANCE appeared!
LANCE demands you FOLLOW him!
Why should I?
LANCE: Because you're MY Pokemon!
That's not true. The Narrator just hates me and made you send me out.
LANCE: But I can only send you of if you're MY Pokemon!
Oh beHAVE.
LANCE points out FIELDYFAN didn't use OH BEHAVE in the correct CONTENSE!
Shaddap.
LANCE doesn't HAVE to SHADDAP!
LANCE wants to fight!
*sigh* Ok...
Wait, you don't have any Pokemon!!
LANCE thinks about this!
FIELDYFAN is right!
EVILDRAGONITE was LANCE's only POKEMON!
LANCE: Uh oh...
Heh heh...now you pay...
FIEDLYFAN used MOSHPIT!
LANCE was SHOVED into MOSHPIT!
LANCE: Oh ****!!!!
RSACi appeared!
RSACi: What did you just say?
LANCE: Um...ah...oh, fork?
RSACi disappeared!
Well that's ONE loser down...
EMINEMFAN appeared!
Better beat this loser too...
EMINEMFAN believes HE's the real SHADY!
Uh...yeah. Ok, let's fight!!
.......................
Oh COME ON!
EMINEMFAN wants to fight!
That's better.
EMINEMFAN sent out EMINEMFAN!
Fine, then go me!
FIEDLYFAN sent out ME!
No, I meant to send out Fieldy Fan!!
Well, you SHOULD'VE SAID that!
Agh!!
EMINEMFAN believes HE's the real SHADY!
EMINEMFAN is just IMITATING!
He's confused...
EMINEMFAN is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
EMINEMFAN fainted!
He has a surprisingly low stamina...well, I guess the only humane thing to do would be to throw him in the mosh pit.
FIELDYFAN used MOSHPIT!
EMINEMFAN was THROWN into MOSHPIT!
EMINEMFAN: BUT I'M THE REAL SHADY!!!
Heh...I thought he was fainted...oh, well all the better!
FIELDYFAN is evil!
You better believe it...I'm actually Dacta MPR's clone!
EVERYONE used GASP!
Was it really that unobvious?! We look exactly the same!
NARRATOR shrugged!
FIELDYFAN won against EMINEMFAN!
All right!
NARRATOR doesn't think this is FAIR!
FIELDYFAN shouldn't DIRECTLY win!
Oh shut up.
FINAL DECISION:
FIELDYFAN lost against JASONROSS!
WHAT?! HE WASN'T EVEN HERE, DAMMIT!
NARRATOR thinks that's TOO BAD!
JASONROSS won against FIELDYFAN!
That's it, Narrator! You haven't seen the last of me! I'm taking you to court!
To be continued...
Will Fieldy Fan win in court? With what she's winning, it's highly doubted, but anyway, find out, on the next OPERA-erm POKEBATTLE!



Battle #35 June 16th, 2000
Justice With An Attitude
Player: Fieldy Fan (Loss vs. Jason Ross, Battle 33)

Why did you record that loss?! It wasn't even a just loss!
NARRATOR thinks it's FUNNY!
Agh...I'll get my justice in court!
FIELDYFAN dragged NARRATOR to COURTROOM!
JUDGE came in!
JUDGE is JASONROSS!
?! Hey...I thought he was a bloody corpse...
JASONROSS is SUPREME!
HE can do WHATEVER he WANTS!
JURY appeared!
JURY is all the NETWORK WEBMASTERS!
And webmistresses!
This is going to be an insane session...
FIELDYFAN doesn't know what she's IN for!
JASONROSS: Order in the court! Order in the court!
Everything already IS in order...
JASONROSS: I know. I just always wanted to say that.
FIELDYFAN's LAWYER appeared!
FIELDYFAN's LAWYER is FIELDY!
Crap! Fieldy isn't a lawyer! He's a bass player!
NARRATOR thinks that's TOUGH!
NARRATOR's LAWYER entered!
NARRATOR's LAWYER is EMINEM!
Serves him RIGHT...
EMINEM is the REAL SHADY!
Oh shut up. That song is SO over played.
Not like KORN's ALL IN THE FAMILY isn't!
But there's a difference. KoRn is better.
FIELDYFAN better KEEP day DREAMING!
Shaddap!
JASONROSS: State your position. And quickly. We only have so much battle space.
Cheapskate...
FIELDY stepped forward!
FIELDY: I say she's not guilty.
COURTROOM is QUIET!
JASONROSS: Well?
FIELDY: That is all.
That didn't help at all!
Who cares!? You're all White Version SCUM!
MENINWHITECOATS appeared!
MIWC dragged ERIC MHE away!
Hey! Hey! Stop this! Where's the justice?!
In the COURTROOM!
But in WHITEVERSION, you have a DISADVANTAGE!
ERIC MHE was dragged away!
JASONROSS: Ahem. Now that THAT is over, let's get Eminem's testimony.
EMINEM: I'm the real Shady!
JASONROSS: *sigh* Yes, we KNOW that already!
EMINEM: He's the real Narrator!
JASONROSS: Anything else?
EMINEM: Nope.
Ha! The Narrator doesn't have much of a chance either!
JASONROSS: Now it's time for the jury to decide...will it be Fieldy Fan, the obnoxious KoRn fan, or Narrator, the all-powerful Narrator!
JURY is discussing!
JURY is taking a LONG time!
Yawn...eyes...sagging...
FIELDYFAN is falling ASLEEP!
Musn't...fall...asleep...
JURY reached VERDICT!
Whattawhatta?
Well, it came pretty close...but since we like Eminem better than KoRn, we find the Narrator not guilty of making Fieldy Fan lose.
Oh come on!! It's right in Battle #33!!
JURY is too lazy to READ BATTLE!
But it's a short battle!!
EVERYONE left COURTROOM!
FIELDYFAN is all ALONE!
VERDICT was UNJUST!
And you knew that Narrator!! Why didn't you turn yourself in?!
NARRATOR isn't THAT stupid!
FIELDY left!
*gasp* Noo! Fieldy, come back!!! I need an autograph!
FIELDYFAN ran after FIELDY!
NARRATOR: Dat's all, folks!
FIELDYFAN lost against NARRATOR!
NARRATOR: Little does she know I had this battle fixed...
You WHAT?!
NARRATOR: Dammit!
NARRATOR ran away!
FIELDYFAN won against NARRATOR!
All RIGHT!

Battle #34 June 15th, 2000
The Wrath of Eric MHE
Player: Mary (Tie vs. Jason Ross, Battle #32)


FLASHFIRE and DACTA MPR were DRAGGED out of LIMBO!
Uh...too much Limboing and punch last night...
DACTA MPR isn't even OLD enough to LEGALLY DRINK!
Hey..the punch was spiked, man, I'm telling ya...
From what NARRATOR heard, DACTA MPR had SPIKED the PUNCH!
Maybe...that's my little sercret...
DACTA MPR noticed WHITEVERSION jumped to #1 SPOT on NETWORK!
Oh my God...maybe Jason should have his head checked...
JASONROSS was DESTROYED in APOCALYPSE!
Then how did he update?
JASONROSS'BLOODYCORPSE updated!
Umm...yeah. And how did the world rebuild?
DACTA MPR asks TOO mnay QUESTIONS!
DACTA MPR should just be HAPPY!
Fine...be that way...
ERIC MHE appeared!
Oh...hi Eric. Nice day we're having, huh?
ERIC MHE doesn't CARE about WEATHER!
ERIC MHE wants REVENGE on DACTA MPR for STEALING his #1 SPOT!
Uh oh...
ERIC MHE is holding CLEVER!
Yipes! Flash, help me out here!
FLASHFIRE ran away!
Son of an onion...
KEVDUDE points out THAT's not ORIGANAL either!
You know what, KevDude? This is getting irritating.
DACTA MPR kicked KEVDUDE out of WHITEVERSIONBATTLES!
KEVDUDE: Yooowwww!
He shouldn't've ever insulted White Version in the first place...
DACTA MPR realizes ERIC MHE is STILL trying to KILL her!
Oh crap.
ERIC MHE is chasing DACTA MPR!
I'm gonna make you as bloody as the Red Text!!
RED TEXT turned GREEN from COMMENT!
DACTA MPR is being CHASED by ERIC MHE who has a CLEVER!
I think you're spelling clever wrong...
NARRATOR doesn't care!
ERIC MHE has DACTA MPR cornered!
Eep!
Muahahaha...I've got you now, White Version scum...
I can now see why he's a mental hospital escapee...
ERIC MHE is holding CLEVER over HEAD!
ERIC MHE is ready to STRIKE!
Our father, who art in heaven...
DACTA MPR is saying the HAIL MARY!
You liar! I'm saying the Our Father! Hail Mary starts with Hail Mary! DUUUHHHH!
GREEN TEXT isn't CATHOLIC!
ERIC MHE is inches away from KILLING DACTA MPR!
Stop this!
What the?
Huh?
Oh c'mon. We have enough colours already.
Who the hell is that anyway?
THAT is JASONROSS'BLOODYCORPSE!
Uh...that's not pretty.
Even though I AM a bloody corpse, I demand you stop trying to kill each other!
But I'm not even trying to kill him! It's all him!
JASONROSS'BLOODYCORPSE realizes this SHOULD be the COURT battle between FIELDYFAN and NARRATOR!
That one will be tomorrow...but right now, GET THIS MENTAL OFF ME!
ERIC MHE was FORCED to stop trying to KILL DACTA MPR!
Agh!! I'll get you soon, Dacta! You shall see, in time! You shall see how DoubleD and Andrevan payed for this!!
ERIC MHE was DRAGGED back to AQUA VERSION!
How did he get into White anyway?
JASONROSS'BLOODYCORPSE doesn't know!
Can you at least clean off some of that blood?
Why?
*sigh* Never mind...
DACTA MPR won against ERIC MHE!
Like the way POKEBATTLES were always SUPPOSE to be!
Oh quiet!
Next time...
Fieldy Fan drags the Narrator to court! Who will win? Find out, on the next OPERA-erm, POKEBATTLE!

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