president


		Battle #13

	Being the over proud Republican she is, Dacta MPR took on the president of the USA. But does the Pencil Ruler even stand a chance against that should've-been-impeached dude? "Tu Quiero Morir" if you don't know, means "You want to die?!" The Spanish Guy, however, had very limited Spanish, since only know limited Spanish myself.

Battle #13 May 16, 2000 The Age Long Conflict: Rebublican vs. Democrat! Player: Mary (Win vs. Shakespeare, Battle #12) Hmmm...I actually won last time. Stop looking over your RECORD! You have more IMPORTANT things to do! Whatever! BILLCLINTON sent out HILLARYCLINTON! Then go, Monica Lewinsky! Go, MONICALEWINSKY! Huh. I just went out on a limb that time. I didn't even KNOW I had Monica in my collection. DACTA MPR is out on a LIMB! Ahhh! Help! I'm afraid of heights! DACTA MPR is SHIVERING like a WETNOODLE! CLINTONS and LEWINSKY decided to IGNORE DACTA MPR! Halllp meeee! BILLCLINTON: She isn't going to shut up, is she? BILLCLINTON hacked down TREE! DACTA MPR fell out of TREE! Owch...you could've made my landing a little softer... TREE is angry! DIE, TREE!!! TREE died! That was...simple. Ha ha, now, Clinton, let's see how you do against ME? The greatest Republican in history! DACTA MPR never RAN for PRESIDENT! DACTA MPR is too YOUNG to even VOTE! Will you can it?! Now, Monica, use the Flirt attack! MONICALEWINSKY used FLIRT! It's super sexy! BILLCLINTON fell for FLIRTING! BILLCLINTON: Lie down for the president, hone'. HILLARYCLINTON: You *****! RSACi appeared! RSACi kicked HILLARYCLINTON out of BATTLE! Heh heh. Looks like she's not gonna be running for senator any time soon. BILLCLINTON: C'mon, Monica, hone'. Let's go to mah mansion. MONICALEWINSKY accepted! BILLCLINTON and MONICALEWINSKY walked away! Beats running away, I guess... BILLCLINTON lost to REPUBLICAN DACTA MPR! Oh, so I have a new title? Yes! Don't you think this battle was a little confusing for Pokebattles fans that don't like policitcs or don't live in America? NARRATOR shrugs! NARRATOR: Tough! EVERYTHING returned to NORMAL! Nothing WAS normal before. RSACi is glaring at DACTA MPR! Hey...didn't your mommy ever tell ya not to stare? RSACi: Nope. She told me never to swear. Heh heh. I have a good "Yo Mama" joke coming on... RSACi is WARNING you not to TELL IT! Why not? RSACi moniters EVERYTHING! Argh. Those ** *****... RSACi: GASP!* RSACi is POINTING a finger at the door for DACTA MPR! Oh c'mon. It was just one little swear! RSACi poinited out it was TWOSWEARS! Oh you're no fun! DACTA MPR was KICKED out the DOOR! ** you! I can swear as much as I ** want behind this piece of ** door! RSACi pulled down EYELID! It's super insulting! Boo hoo! DACTA MPR lost to RSACi!
			Battle #14 May 17th, 2000 Tu Quiero Morir?! Player: American (No Record) Uh...Mexico's confusing... AMERICAN is looking CONFUSED around MEXICO! I really, really wish I listened in Spanish class... SPANISHGUY appeared! Hey...maybe YOU can help me. SPANISHGUY: Hola, senor! Adonde vas? What?! TRANSLATOR appeared! TRANSLATOR: I believe he said "Hello, mister! Where are you going?" At least, that's what that rookie Spanish-speaker called "Dacta MPR" told me. You're not a REAL translator are you? TRANSLATOR: No, not really. I'm known as a bum around here. Hm...that's how I'll probably end up here if I don't remember how to speak Spanish... SPANISHGUY: Tienes razon! TRANSLATOR: He said "You're right!" Argh...even the guy that doesn't speak my language agrees with me...wait a second! Hey, I thought you didn't speak English! How did you understand me?! SPANISHGUY: Mi no hablo ingles. Mi hablo espanol. But can you understand English? SPANSIHGUY: Tienes razon, tambien! Diiiie! SPANISHGUY: Yo no quiero morir! I wanna fight! I'll beat you to a bloody pulp! SPANISHGUY: Si! SPANISHGUY wants to fight! Let's go, let's go! Greetings! Hey...who are you? I'm the Canadian! So this is really a North American fight? Pretty much. Si, senor! Oh crap. Spanish Guy got his own text. CANADIAN wants to fight! ALL are GROWLING at each other! Muahahahaha! Americans are the laziest, most suffiecient people on Earth! We never do our own work, we just import everything! Yeah, and you're saying you should blame Canada! Argh. Okay, let's get this started the right way. Nuclear Bombs, go! NUCLEARBOMBS, go! All right, go, Mrs. Mitkey! CANADIAN sent out MRS.MITKEY! Yipes, it's my old substitute teacher that always demanded we know all the Candian provinces and yet I couldn't memorize them all! Muahahahahahaha! Lapises, va! SPANISHGUY sent out PENCILS! Hey, isn't that Dacta MPR and Jess MPR's thing?.... Muahahahahaha! SPANISHGUY revealed TRUEIDENITY! SPANISHGUY is really a GIRL! SPANISHGUY is really JESSMPR! Crapliness. Well, we lost the Spanish person, but c'mon, this battle ain't over yet! In fact...we haven't even started it... Yeah, let's get started! JESSMPR, AMERICAN and CANADIAN are locked in DEATHMATCH! To be continued... Next time...who will win the fight of the North America, even though Jess isn't from Mexico? Will ANYONE win? Find out, on the next Opera-erm, Pokebattle! Note: This battle was not made to offend Americans, Canadians or Mexicans in anyway.