Battle #17

"Tuning Job" featured Bill "That Cello" Smith again...and Dacta MPR had to tune Bill's C String...
"Flash Flood" featured Flashfire, Flame Version's Webmaster. It also had Evil Text and Cartman throwing Cheesypoofs at something from the Flame Tournement.

Battle #17 May 20th, 2000
Tuning Job
Player: Mary (Loss vs. RSCAi, Battle #13)

DACTA MPR escaped from BEHINDOOR!
Finally...
BILL "THATCELLO" SMITH appeared!
Oh crap...where's Jess?
JESS MPR appeared!
JESS MPR: *gasp* Sorry, I just had a tough battle with a Canadian and American.
Good. Now let's take on this piece of rotted plywood!
BILL is not a PIECE of ROTTEDPLYWOOD!
BILL is angry!
BILL wants to fight!
BILL sent out CSTRING!
No you don't cello! Pencils, go!
Go, PENCILS!
PENCILS used LEADBOMB!
It's not very effective...
Dang! No!
CSTRING used OUTOFTUNE!
Come here, C String! I need to tune you!
DACTA MPR tuned CSTRING perfectly!
Yes! I am GOOD!
CSTRING fainted!
BILL sent out CUPOFLIFE!
?!
CUPOFLIFE is filled with COLDWATER!
Oh crap!
CUPOFLIFE used COLDWATER!
What? DACTA MPR is evolving!
DACTA MPR evolved to CARTMAN!
****! This ain't fair!
BILL is laughing!
How can a cello possibly laugh?...
BILL: Ccccccc dddeeegg!
Translation: You are a fool to challenge me!
Argh! Diiie!
Hello, everyone!
Oh. Hi, Flashfire. How did you get into the White Version?
FLASHFIRE got into WHITEVERSION through BACKDOOR!
You know, I really have to learn to lock that thing.
Uh...maybe you can help us with this minor cello problem.
Maybe.
JESS MPR is angered!
JESS MPR points out SHE never got a turn to FIGHT!
Fine then. Try your stuff.
JESS MPR used PENCILTIARAPOWER!
But, it failed!
Let me try.
CARTMAN believes BILL should RESPECT his AUTHORITY!
No effect!
Uh...okay, scratch that.
BILL is going to DESTROY the PENCILDUO!
Flashfire, if you're going to help...
BILL is nearing CARTMAN and grinning EVILLY!
I can't see how a cello can grin...but Flashfire, we need help! We need mucho help!
Fine! Watch me work.
To be continued...
Will Flashfire save the Pencil Duo, or be destroyed by Bill "That Cello" Smith? Will they survive to see the Pokebattle after? Find out, on the next Opera-erm, Pokebattle!

Battle #18 May 21st, 2000
Flash Flood!!!
Player: Mary (Unconfirmed ending vs. Bill "That Cello" Smith, Battle #17)

You can do it, Flashfire!
CARTMAN believes FLASHFIRE can DOIT!
Well, CARTMAN is FATELLY WRONG!
**** you, Narrator...
Heh heh! I have you now, Bill! You're a cello, and made of wood! And I have fire!!
FLASHFIRE used FLAMETHROWER!
It doesn't effect BILL!
Huh?
Argh...it's the fire-proof varnish I coated Bill with when he used to be my cello...maybe I should've mentioned that.
That would've been good!!
Hey...I forgot okay?
JESS MPR wants to help!
Jess, you're too weak, you idiot!
JESS MPR does not like being called an IDIOT!
JESS MPR is going to TRANSFORM!
Hey, settle down! Sit! Down!
JESS MPR was forced to SITDOWN!
JESS MPR: Don't think I won't get up!
You just stay there for a while...as for you, Bill, Evil Text, go!
EVILTEXT doesn't want to COMEOUT!
EVILTEXT is governed by EVILNARRATOR!
But we left the Evil Narrator back at the Flame Version tournement!!
EVILTEXT doesn't care!
EVILTEXT used EVILBITE!
EVILTEXT is hooked onto CARTMAN'S BLUBBER!
Oww! You wretched text!
Hmmm...that looks weird that text is biting you on your love handles...
DON'T CALL THEM LOVE HANDLES!!
BILL: Muahahaha! I have just the way to beat you! Flashfood, I choose you, now!
And this cello is suppose to be fighting for the goodness of the world? Ow, get off of me, you wretched text!
EVILTEXT continues BITING!
BILL sent out FLASHFOOD!
It's my evil Vaporeon cousin's sister's brother's mother's plumber's friend!
Long relationship!!
FLASHFOOD used FLASHFLOOD!
CARTMAN, JESS MPR and FLASHFIRE were SWEPTUP in FLASHFLOOD!
CARTMAN'S fat is being USED like a LIFEPRESERVER!
Nah, nah!
FLASHFIRE fainted!
D'oh!
JESS MPR fainted!
Double d'oh!
FLASHFLOOD and BILL are laughing EVILLY!
You wretched cello! Ooowww! Get offa me, you stupid text!
CARTMAN threw CHEESYPOOFS at EVILTEXT!
No effect!
Boo-hoo!
CARTMAN is very BOUENT!
NARRATOR doesn't know how to SPELL either!
CARTMAN is being WASHEDAWAY by FLASHFLOOD!
EVILTEXT let go of CARTMAN!
EVILTEXT spit out BADTASTE!
EVILTEXT ran away!
At least that pain is gone...
Like I said before...CARTMAN is being WASHEDAWAY by FLASHFLOOD!
I'll get you next time, CELLOOOOoooooooo....
CARTMAN was WASHEDAWAY!
CARTMAN lost to BILL!
Note: Much of this was taken from the Flame Tournement, including the Evil Text.

Battle #19 May 22nd, 2000
Voo Doo Returns
Player: Voo Doo Bunny of Death

All you who think I'm an imitation of Doompuff, you're wrong! I was created origanally by Jess MPR and Dacta MPR accidently when Dacta stole a plain bunny from her sister and poked pins in me!
VOODOOBUNNY is an IMITATION of DOOMPUFF!
Can it!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE has lost SLAVELANCE!
You imbecile!! He was our last hope at taking over the Blue Version!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE: D'oh!
RABIDBRUNO appeared!
Hey, you can't appear yet! Metal still hasn't posted that battle!!
Does RABIDBRUNO  really care?!
Probably not.
DROOL is coming down RABIDBRUNO's mouth!
RABIDBRUNO needs THINGSTOBITE!
RABIDBRUNO notices YOUTWO!
RABIDBRUNO wants to fight!
That is not pretty...muahahaha...this human should be simple to destroy...
VOODOOBUNNY is plotting EVILLY!
Well, don't tell the world!
NARRATOR told WORLD!
Stupid Narrator...I'll just take one of Bruno's hairs...
But, it failed!
RABIDBRUNO used RABIDBITE!
Owww! It's on my stuffing! Get it off!
VOODOOBUNNY needs stuffing, badly!
WHITEWEBMASTER reminds VOODOOBUNNY that HE was SENTENCED to FOREVER fight you!
Hey, I got worse problems right now!
VOODOOBUNNY needs to find STUFFINGDONAR!
VOODOOBUNNY is looking through RECORDS!
There's no recorded stuffing donars?! But how can this be?!
Most PEOPLE have BLOOD, not STUFFING!
*sob* But I can't die! I'm suppose to be White's Doompuff!
NARRATOR thought you SAID that you WEREN'T an IMITATION of DOOMPUFF!
*sniff* I don't care right now...I'm suppose to be invincible!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE points out HE'S suppose to be INVINCIBLE!
NO YOU'RE NOT!! YOU WERE JUST MISFORTUNATE RESULT OF A TOURNEMENT! I *sob* AM THE REAL EVIL OF WHITE VERSION!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE doesn't really care!
RABIDBRUNO's attack continues!
VOODOOBUNNY is weakening!
The excitement is building over this hot battle!
*sob* The last thing I need in my last moments of shame is the Pokemon Stadium Narrator...
VOODOOBUNNY has one MOMENT left of LIFE!
Good-bye, World!
NARRATOR points out THIS isn't the WORLD, but the SICKWHITEVERSION!
*sob*
VOODOOBUNNY died!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE is laughing!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE: Muahahahaha! Now it's my time!
RABIDBRUNO used RABIDBITE!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE: Ahh! Rabid Elite Four member!
Okay, I'm butting in!
Ally EVILDRAGONITE: Ahh! The White Version Webmaster no longer has to suffer the punishment!
That's right! And I'm set on making this battle entertaining!
METALWEBMASTER appeared!
METALWEBMASTER: SIGN MY GUESTBOOK!
Ah...that's better.
Ally EVILDRAGONITE: That wasn't entertaining. That was the facts.
Shut up. Battle Twenty will be much better.
WHITEWEBMASTER is making FALSEPROMISES!
Die, Narrator!
NARRATOR died!
..........
*sigh* Looks like I'LL have to finish this.
RABIDBRUNO used RABIDBITE!
Ahhh!
WHITEWEBMASTER and Ally EVILDRAGONITE fainted!
WHITEWEBMASTER, VOODOBUNNY and Ally EVILDRAGONITE lost to RABIDBRUNO!
Heh heh heh...faking death is cool.
Next time, it's Battle #20, a battle you won't want to miss...tune in tomorrow, kiddies! It's the return of <~error, cannot display image~> and some insaneness that you'll never forget!
Uh, I'm sounding like an announcer...
ANYWAY, tune in tomorrow!

Battle #20 May 23rd, 2000
Not Quite Principal...
Player: Mr. Chiszar, Assitant Principal (Loss vs. Mary, Battle #1)

My head hurts like hell...no wonder I am in hell at this place...
MR.CHISZAR is in HELL!
Literally!
What?!
SATAN appeared!
SATAN: I've been waiting for you, Chiszar. Now I can finally retire, and my apprentice can carry it up!
What?! I'm not your apprentice! Funny, Satan sort of looks like Jay Lennow...
SATAN is insulted!
My God! I've been fainted for twenty straight battles!
SATAN does not like you CHANGING the SUBJECT!
SATAN also does not like you TALKING about his ENEMY!
Uh, whatever...hey, where did my office go?!
A little forgetful, ain't we?
MR.CHISZAR is in HELL!
I know, I know...but shouldn't I have an office in Hell?
SATAN does not think so!
MR.CHISZAR is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
Oww....
FLASHFIRE appeared!
Not a bad lookin' Flareon...
Shut up, you stupid assitant principal. Hah! Can't even manage to be a REAL principal!
Hey!
MR.CHISZAR is angry!
..................
FLASHFIRE wants to fight!
I still find this unjust...
SATAN insists you DON'TFIGHT!
Hey, you're suppose to be the lord of evil, not the lord of peacemaking!
SATAN reveiled TRUEIDENITY!
SATAN is really HITLER!
Like THAT makes him any less evil! In fact, it leaves him just the same!
Are you SUGGESTING that HITLER is SATAN?
Yes.
HITLER is angry!
HITLER wants to fight!
Wait...now I have to fight both Hitler AND Flashfire!?
Yup. That's right. But individually. I don't wanna fight with that Nazi scum.
HITLER does not like being called NAZISCUM!
Nazi Scum!
NAZISCU-erm, HITLER is angry at FLASHFIRE!
Hey, hey, hey! I might be Satan's Apprentice, but I still know that even Adolf Hitler and a Flareon shouldn't fight!
Well, why NOT?
Because I think Hitler would have too much of an advantage.
That's what you think!
FLASHFIRE sent out ALLIEDFORCES!
HITLER: Sacre blue!
You idiot, you're suppose to be German!
HITLER is not turly GERMAN!
HITLER is AUSTRIAN!
?! Well..."Sacre blue" isn't Austrian either!
HITLER knows that!
Allied Forces, you know what to do!
ALLIEDFORCES drove HITLER out of U.S.A. with PITCHFORKS!
You idiots! You were suppose to use heavy artiliery!
PITCHFORKS were just as effective!
HITLER: Ooowwwiiie! I want my mommy!
HITLER wants his MOMMY!
HITLER is vulnerable!
ALLIEDFORCES threatened with PITCHFORKS!
HITLER fainted!
That was...different.
Now for you, Chiszar!
Ahhh!
FLASHFIRE sent out DR.PAKKAY!
Nooo! Not the real principal!
DR.PAKKAY used FIRE!
DR.PAKKAY fired MR.CHISZAR!
Wahhh...this ain't fair, I barely got a frickin' chance!
POKEBATTLES are not SUPPOSE to be FAIR!
Why can't they be just for me?
NARRATOR doesn't know!
MR.CHISZAR'S pride greatly fell!
Wahhh!
MR.CHISZAR cried himself to defeat!
MR.CHISZAR fainted!
MR.CHISZAR lost to FLASHFIRE!
Nyah nyah!

Battle #21 May 24th, 2000
Dr. Decker: Vampire Slayer
Player: Dr. Decker, Vampire Slayer (No Record)

OFF-KEY BTVS music is PLAYING!
DR.DECKER, VAMPIRE SLAYER appeared!
Oh...hi everyone.
VAMPIRESLAYERS are purely FEMALES!
That's sexist crap. And how did you know I was appearing?
OFF-KEY BTVS music always PLAYS when you DO!
JASONROSS appeared!
Yeah yeah, the Supreme Leader of Pokebattles. Heh, like I care.
JASONROSS demands you PLEA for your LIFE!
Don't wanna.
JASONROSS believes you are LAZY!
So?
JASONROSS wants to fight!
So THAT'S what you want...
DR.DECKER sent out MRS.POINTY!
An IMITATION of MR.POINTY!
Shaddap.
Hmmm...just wondering, Decker, but how did you get your Ph.D?
Hey, why does HE get his own text?!
JASONROSS is SUPREME!
Evilness...evilness I must slay, you demon!
JASONROSS is laughing evilly!
Muahahahahaha...
Oh, and to ANSWER your question...I got my Ph.D from Harvard!
DR.DECKER held down EYELID!
It's super insulting!
You have a bloated ego...
So? Mrs. Pointy, Slay!
MRS.POINTY used SLAY!
JASONROSS isn't a VAMPIRE!
Argh! You can slay OTHER things than vampires, you imbecile of a stake!
MRS.POINTY does not like to be DISRESPECTED!
MRS.POINTY demands you RESPECT her AUTHORITAH!
No effect!
Duh...that's CARTMAN's attack...
Ha ha ha! Me, use erase White Version from Network!
JASONROSS used ERASEWHITEVERSION from NETWORK!
Too long of an ATTACK!
JASONROSS hears his MOTHER calling!
MOTHER: Jasooon!! Your dinner's ready! And stop harrassing that male vampire slayer and just pin him!
Yes Mother...
JASONROSS pinned DR.DECKER!
Oh the humanity!
DR.DECKER fainted!
DR.DECKER lost to JASONROSS!