Player: James (TR) [Record: 3-0-1 Win vs. Pokekiller, #33]
Location: Saffron City
WHAT? I haven't appeared in a battle since...2 weeks ago!
That's ridiculous!
Ally KAREN says they have at least appeared!
Ally POKEKILLER-
He's our ally?
Oh yeah, we allied in battle #33, long time ago.
Ally POKEKILLER says that the fact they appeared means something weird is about to happen!
Ally KAREN agrees!
You're no help...
PETER appeared!
The guy that was before a narrator?
You're right!
.....
PETER wants to fight!
GIOVANNI wants to fight!
ROCKET wants to fight!
HEY! What's doing our boss and that other Rocket with that guy????
GIOVANNI said they allied!
ROCKET agrees!
Fine.. go Weezing!
Go! WEEZING!
Ally KAREN send out GENGAR!
Ally POKEKILLER send out BISHOP!
PETER send out RAPIDASH!
GIOVANNI send out NIDORINO!
ROCKET send out RATTATA!
Errr... didn't Bishop died?
Ally POKEKILLER says that's another one!
I think is just author's lazyness...
JAMES gets struck by a LIGHTNING BOLT!
Ah! So you hit me for point a plothole, eh?
Ok, there is another one: The Narrator never said Giovanni and Peter allied!
WEBMASTER: I have a cold, don't make me have to notice everything.
Huh, but there is no relation inbetween-
JAMES gets hit by a LIGHTNING BOLT again!
SHUT UP AND BATTLE FOR ONCE, DAMMIT!
Fine, fine... Weezing.. .use.-
WEEZING used .!
Definately the new narrator is like the old one...they're both annoying.
WEEZING thows a DOT at enemy RATTATA!
RATTATA fainted!
GENGAR used SHADOW BALL!
BISHOP used HOLY WATER!
NIDORINO fainted!
GIOVANNI send out GIOVANNI!
GIOVANNI: James.. I am your boss.
Noooo!!!!
JAMES is paralyzed! It may not attack!
GIOVANNI is your BOSS!
Is super effective!
Enemy PETER used POKE BALL!
JAMES was caught!
Ally KAREN ran away!
Ally POKEKILLER ran away!
Argh!
They at least get a loss, right?
Nope, just a TIE!
NO!
Wood battle #47: King of Steel September 3, 2002
Player: Nerra-Metal [Record: 3-4-1 Loss vs. Chain Man, #39]
Location: Juanximo's Castle Ruins
nooooooooo
oh-my-god
they-killed-juanximo
you-ba-
NARRATOR used UNHACK!
NERRA-METAL was UNHACKED!
uh-what-am-i-doing-here
NARRATOR says JUANXIMO HACKED YOU!
easy-on-the-caps-lock-eh
Personally is BETTER than NO CAPS at all!
yeah-right
anyways-i-need-something-to-do
so-i-am-going-to-restaure-those-ruins-for-me
VARIOUS HOURS used PASS!
VARIOUS HOURS passed!
Location: Nerra-Metal's Castle
better
NARRATOR says that was FAST!
Only 2 lines!
i-am-leet
y35-1-4m
w00t
NARRATOR says this is a new LOW!
NERRA-METAL is not only a NERRA-TORR rip-off, but it's also a HACK KOR rip-off!
wh47-4r3-u-54y1n6
NARRATOR is fed up...
PETER appeared!
PETER wants to fight!
g0-m3
G0.. err.... Go! NERRA-METAL!
Enemy PETER send out PETER!
m1551l5 0u7
NERRA-METAL used M155115 0U7!
NERRA-METAL doesn't knows that attack!
h4-h4-h4
Enemy PETER used MASTERBALL!
NERRA-METAL was caught!
n0000000000000000
End of the battle!
50n-0f-4-0n10n
Great, it's also a MIDGYOTO rip-off...
WEBMASTER: This battle was rushed, I know.
Wood Battle #48: The Swordmen October 4, 2002
Player: Isaac [Record: 4-3-0 Loss vs. Jason Ross Clone, #42]
Location: Giant Paperbox of No Return
It's 12 AM....
Huh?
Err.. hi, Narrator.
Hi
LINK appeared!
LINK asks what do you want!
This Version isn't enough big for two swordmen...
LINK says there is plenty of space in Wood Version!
LINK also says that almost all the other versions are dead!
I see your point, but...
ISAAC sees a POINT..
In LINK'S SWORD..
that iy just PULLED OFF!
So he's decided to fight, huh?
Yes!
LINK wants to fight!
One against one or sending stuff?
LINK send out LINK!
Ah.
Enemy LINK used ASK!
I didn't send myself yet...
Enemy LINK ask why they're in a GIANT PAPERBOX OF NO RETURN!
I don't know...author decided it.
Bah! This battle is dumb! Go me!
Go! ISAAC!
ISAAC attacks!
Critical hit!
Enemy LINK used JUMP SLASH!
Is super effective!
Argh! Take that!
ISAAC used RAGNAROK!
Is super effective!
Enemy LINK calls you a cheater!
Psyenergy is not cheat!
Enemy LINK used FIRE ARROW!
ISAAC was burned!
ISAAC lost HP by the BURNing!
Now THAT'S cheat.
LINK says you're a bad loser!
I'm not a loser!
DIE NOW, STUPID RIP-OFF!
Enemy LINK says he's not rip-off!
ISAAC used GRAND GAIA!
LINK is about to faint!
Ha! Eat that!
PETER used POKÉ BALL!
LINK was caught!
What the? You are the narrator guy!
PETER says that's how they call him!
PETER used POKÉBALL!
ISAAC was caught!
Press A to escape!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
You broke free!
Prepare to die, CHEATER!!!!!!!
ISAAC used METEOR SHOWER!
Hey... that attack is not in Golden Sun!
ISAAC doesn't cares!
PETER neither does!
PETER used IRON CLUBMERANG!
Hit 2 times!
ISAAC lost HP from the burn!
AARGHHHH!
PETER used POKÉBALL!
ISAAC was caught!
Battle ended!
PETER: This is your end, Wood....
Wood Battle #49: Gathering October 4, 2002
Player: Daniel [Record: 11-2-2 Win vs. Peter, battle #43]
Location: Japan, Real World
Isn't that place amazing?
Ally ERIKA agrees!
Ally JESUS is bored!
Ally VINCENT is looking HENT...
Ally CHAIN MAN is punching VINCENT for being a PERVERT!
Ally SARA facefaults!
Everyone laughs!
You know, author has let us for once travel the real world...
We should be happy.
NARRATOR wonders WHERE is the JR CLONE!
ERIKA: We smashed him!
CHAIN MAN: Hard!
EVERYONE: YEA!
O...k....
NARRATOR also wonders what are you doing in JAPAN!
We're going to see the Pokemon Ruby/Sapphire Super Duper Special Show.
NARRATOR thinks, in the immortal words of CRIMSONKING, that name SUCKS!
Yeah, so?
.....
Hey, people, look!
A walking robot!
Maybe is part from the Show...?
WALKING ROBOT used PUNCH!
CHAIN MAN was PUNCHED!
CHAIN MAN: Owww!! What was that?
WALKING ROBOT: |-|4
WALKING ROBOT was renamed NERRA-METAL!
NO!
NERRA-METAL wants to fight!
NERRA-METAL send out ASSASIN ROBOTS!
SIX of THEM!
Let's take them!
Go! TYRANITAR!
Ally SARA send out SARA!
Ally ERIKA send out EXEGGUTOR!
Ally JESUS send out SCYTHER!
Ally VINCENT send out HITMONLEE!
Ally CHAIN MAN send out CHAIN MAN!
Attack!
TYRANITAR used EARTHQUAKE!
ASSASIN ROBOT fainted!
SARA used FINAL FLASH!
ASSASIN ROBOT fainted!
EXEGGUTOR used SOLARBEAM!
ASSASIN ROBOT fainted!
SCYTHER used SLASH!
ASSASIN ROBOT fainted!
HITMONLEE used MEGA KICK!
ASSASIN ROBOT fainted!
CHAIN MAN used CHAIN BEATDOWN!
ASSASIN ROBOT fainted!
DANIEL's team wins!
Well, that was easy.
Enemy NERRA-METAL absorbs ASSASIN ROBOTS's REMAININGS!
What? NERRA-METAL is evolving!
NERRA-METAL evolved into PERFECT-METAL!
We're dead...
PERFECT-METAL wants to fight!
PETER appeared!
PETER: Nice done, now let's end with the few decent Wood Characters AND RULE THE VERSION!
PETER wants to fight!
Erika and me take Peter!
You four have Perfect-Metal!
GO!
Special Battle #50:
Wood Battle #50: Webmaster needs a life October 5, 2002
Player: Daniel [Record: 12-2-2 Win vs. Assasin Robot, #49]
Location: Tokyo, Japan
Be ready for death....
PETER wants to fight!
And we (Erika and me) want too.
PETER: Perfect-Metal, destroy them!
PERFECT-METAL is busy fighting OTHER WOOD CHARACTERS!
PETER: Argh. In that case, let's go
Player: Perfect-Metal [Record: 3-5-1 loss vs. Peter, #47]
CHAIN MAN wants to fight!
SARA wants to fight!
JESUS wants to fight!
VINCENT wants to fight!
4 against one.. NO FAIR!
PERFECT-METAL IS MAD!
O_O.... PERFECT-METAL is using caps and proper puntuaction!
So?
They can't beat me..
I'm the almighty Perfect-Metal..
and soon those little guys will KNOW IT!
CHAIN MAN says he's not little!
SARA says she's not a guy!
I don't care...
Go, me! Let's crush them!
Go! PERFECT-METAL!
SARA send out CLEFAIRY!
CHAIN MAN send out CHAIN!
JESUS send out SCYTHER!
VINCENT send out HITMONLEE!
Me, Fire attack!
PERFECT-METAL used FIRE!
PERFECT-METAL was FIRED!
WHAT?
PERFECT-METAL was FIRED.. out a CANNON!
But, it failed!
PERFECT-METAL kept going and crashed... into TREE!
TREE wants to fight!
This sucks...
VOICE FRON DOWN ON GROUND: Someone said suck?
ANOTHER VOICE: I'M NOT DEAD!
YET ANOTHER VOICE: Yes, Al Gore, you aren't. We believe you.
O_o
NARRATOR agrees!
Enemy TREE used FALL!
Apples FELL on PERFECT-METAL!
It's super painful!
It is? Oww, it IS!
Weird, a little apples causing too much pain.
APPLES were renamed SUPER APPLES!
In that case...
Me, use eat!
PERFECT-METAL used EAT!
SUPER APPLES were EATEN!
Enemy CLEFAIRY used METRONOME!
Enemy CLEFAIRY used HYPNOSIS!
PERFECT-METAL fell asleep!
Zzzzzzzzzzzzz...
Enemy CHAIN used CHAIN SMASH!
Enemy SCYTHER used SCYTHESLASH!
Enemy HITMONLEE used HYPER KICK!
Enemy TREE used BRANCH THROW!
Owww!!! How you dare to attack a defenseless mecha?
NARRATOR points it up that PERFECT-METAL has MISSILES, GUNS, BOMB, and many other stuff that makes HELLUVA PAIN!
So? While asleep, I can't use them!
But they're AUTOMATIC!
Your point being...?
And please, no sword jokes.
My point being NERRA-METAL is a COMPLETE MORON THAT HAS A PIECE OF SAND INSTEAD OF A BRAIN!
Or a AI BRAIN, for that matter!
..oh.
Bah, who cares: I want to destroy anyways.
PERFECT-METAL used WANT!
PERFECT-METAL wants to destroy!
PERFECT-METAL is TOO repetitive!
Eh, I didn't said I was going to use the attack "want"
Your point being...?
Don't copy me.
Ok....
Enemy CLEFAIRY used METRONOME!
Enemy CLEFAIRY used HYPER BEAM!
HYPER BEAM destroys your MISSILES!
CHAIN REACTION is produced!
Noooo....
Enemy CHAIN used CHAIN SLASH!
Enemy SCYTHER used RAZOR CUT!
Enemy HITMONLEE used DESTROYER KICK!
Enemy TREE fell over you!
No fair...
PERFECT-METAL explodes!
PERFECT-METAL recomposes!
TREE fainted!
Ha ha ha!
Ooooooo...
PERFECT-METAL fainted!
SARA and OTHERS have SIGS OF RELIEF!
Player: Peter [Record: 6-1-0 Win vs. Isaac, battle #48]
There is a Narrator around there?
Yes! NARRATOR is HERE!
Finally... the way you made all attacks be totally unfair to PM was cruel.
NARRATORS ARE CRUELS!
Plus, it makes for BQ!
Of course, humour is everything.
As long you want an high BQ!
Great. The advertisment for today is done.
And the battle..?
DANIEL wants to fight!
ERIKA wants to fight!
Go, Link!
Go! LINK!
DANIEL send out TYRANITAR!
ERIKA send out PARASECT!
Link, use your Fire Arrow!
LINK used FIRE ARROW!
ARROW is put on FIRE!
ARROW was renamed ASH!
ASH screams as he flies through the air!
ASH kept going and crashed... into near CHAINSAW!
ASH died an horribly, horribly death!
And those 6 last lines were just for make my attack have no effect?
No!
They also were for SPLAT SOME BLOOD!
Ewww....
Enemy PARASECT used SPORE!
LINK is fast asleep!
Enemy TYRANITAR used CRUNCH!
LINK was CRUNCHED!
LINK fainted!
Team job.. grrr... go James!
The enemy is powerful! Get'm JAMES!
JAMES used ROSE THROW!
PARASECT lost 0.0000000000000000000000....00001 HP!
Narration is biased.
This is one of UNWRITTEN RULES!
In BATTLE #50, BAD GUYS always LOSE!
Unless they're named MIDGYOTO!
Fiiiiineeeee...
Go Isaac! Go Giovanni! Go Rocket!
Go! ISAAC!
ISAAC used ESCAPE!
ISAAC has ESCAPED!
ROCKET used ROCKET!
ROCKET and GIOVANNI ran away in a ROCKET!
That wasn't even funny.
But it causes you to LOSE!
Enemy TYRANITAR used EARTHQUAKE!
JAMES fainted!
This is going to hurt...
Seems is all up to you, Rapidash!
Do it! RAPIDASH!
RAPIDASH used FIRE BLAST!
PARASECT fainted!
Enemy TYRANITAR used EARTHQUAKE!
RAPIDASH fainted!
Nooo!
LINK ran away!
PETER fainted!
WEBMASTER appeared!
WEBMASTER used ASCENSION!
PETER now has the rights to narrate LotD battles and FIC-STYLE narration!
Really? Thanks!
You're fainted!
Ooops.
Next battles
