Battles 56 to 60:
Battle #56: Aftermath of the Venom Deathpuff...sorta June 24, 2000
Setting: Aqua Version
Player: Louisiana Smith [No Record]

LOUISIANA SMITH appeared!
NARRATOR thinks that is the DUMBEST rip-off it’s heard in a while!
Me? A rip-off?!? Of what?
Ever hear of, oh…INDIANA JONES?
Why yes, we went to High School together I do believe.
NARRATOR would like to know if you have any relation to a BOB?
No, I’m afraid not. Now, I really must continue my search through these ruins…
HAND appeared!
What the?!
SOMEONE is climbing out of the RUBBLE!
WHAT?! There must be six tons of debris here, no one could survive under that!
MR. MACHO GUNG-HO ACTION MAN emerged!
MR. MACHO GUNG-HO ACTION MAN shakes his head!
Huh? Oh…I’ve heard of you… somehow I expected you to be….shorter.
MMGHAM wants to know if anyone caught the PLATES of those SEMIS that hit him!
I’m afraid I didn’t see any semi-trucks. Just a little Jigglypuff with bloodshot eyes.
MMGHAM was afraid of that!
MMGHAM digs through the rubble and pulls out BAM-BOOM!
Hey! That’s the mythical weapon I came here searching for!
MMGHAM says he found BAM-BOOM here a long time ago!
Really? Hand it over, I want a look!
BAM-BOOM says no way!
?!?!?
LOUISIANA SMITH fainted!
MMGHAM shrugs and leaves!
MMGHAM: That’s the last time I’m messing with that “Doompuff,” that’s for sure…
NARRATOR just decided that LOUSIANA sounds more like a FEMALE name than a MALE name!
LOUISIANA SMITH woke up in a grumpy rage!
HEY!!
You want a fight?
Fighting the NARRATOR is POINTLESS!
The NARRATOR is a disembodied voice with some minor REALITY ALTERING POWERS!
No mere MORTAL can defeat it!
Heh, I’ll take you up on that bet! Go…
Enemy TREE used BRANCH TOSS!
OWW!!!
Hey! That tree wasn’t behind me a second ago!
What did NARRATOR tell you about its POWERS?
TREE used LEAF!
What’s that going to…OOF!!!
DRIFTING LEAF knocked down LOUSIANA SMITH!
Oww…what the heck was that thing loaded with?
Just a little LEAD!
Ug…chalk me up as an environmentalist then…NO LEAD IN THE WATER!
All right tree, you asked for it! Go Growlithe!
The enemy’s super-powerful! Get’m GROWLITHE!
Enemy TREE used ROOT ENTANGLE!
ROOTS shot out of the ground and ENSNARED GROWLITHE!
ACK!!
ROOTS smashed GROWLITHE up and down until it fainted!
Uh-oh…
NARRATOR laughs!
You had the nerve to challenge the NARRATOR, but you can’t even handle a mere TREE!
Hey…these trees were on the top of the food chain until Doompuff came along!
TREE snapped in half for no apparent reason!
Uh…I can’t imagine this is good…
DOOMPUFF is angry!
AT WHAT?! NOT ME!! NOT ME!!
I didn’t do anything to it!!!
DOOMPUFF has failed to destroy AQUA VERSION!
Uh…don’t feel down Doomy, you’re awfully close.
DOOMPUFF had wanted this puny version out of the way before it went for the BIG FISH, but it’ll have to wait now!
Huh?
DOOMPUFF is going to find a way into RED VERSION, destroy its KNOCK-OFF and rule all of POKéBATTLES from the FOREST OF NO RETURN!
Hey…how does Doompuff know about that?
DOOMPUFF has an internet-capable computer!
Wow…and here I thought it a mindless drooling creature that killed things.
DOOMPUFF more or less is, doesn’t mean it doesn’t like its entertainment though!
DOOMPUFF storms off looking for RED VERSION!
Heh, how about that? It didn’t even bother to kick my butt before going. I’m lucky!
TUXEDO MASK appeared!
Huh? Don’t I know you?
TUXEDO MASK is with the SAILOR SCOUT team!
But he doesn’t feel that’s important at the moment!
He says FANBOY will pay for what he did!
What did he do?
Read the ARCHIVES to find out the basic story and then use your imagination to fill in the details!
I hear Doompuff ate your girlfriends tuxy.
TUXEDO MASK: WHAT?!?! Ooh, now I’m…
DEAD! TUXEDO MASK is now dead!
What? Who, how? Why?
TUXEDO MASK was eaten by DOOMPUFF! It was easy for DOOMPUFF! DOOMPUFF just felt like it!
DOOMPUFF says he can join the SAILORS now!
DOOMPUFF laughs!
You’re evil.
DOOMPUFF knows this!
DOOMPUFF ate MISTY’S TOGEPI this morning!
Some would argue that that’s a good deed.
DOOMPUFF just did it to make her cry!
Then DOOMPUFF ate her too!
Nasty, nasty, nasty…
DOOMPUFF says hey, if MEWTWO can eat ASH and RED DOOMPUFF can eat BROCK, then AQUA DOOMPUFF can eat MISTY!
DOOMPUFF decides it’s let you live for far too long!
DOOMPUFF used DEATH TORNADO!
I SHOULD HAVE KEPT MY BIG MOUTH SHUT!!!!
LOUISIANA SMITH was thrown over 500 FEET into the AIR and crashed down to EARTH very PAINFULLY!
Oowwwww…..I can…hardly….believe that…I survived that….
DOOMPUFF’S aim was off, the attack only nicked you!
Ok…where am I?
On the GROUND!
Gee…thanks….
ERIC, MIKE and HAUNTER appeared!
HAUNTER: Haunt!
ERIC: Hmm… think we should take him back to camp guys?
MIKE: Yeah, he’s a good example of a charity case…
Hey! You dare to offend me, Lou…
ERIC used KICK!
LOUSIANA SMITH fainted!
ERIC: All right, haul the loser along Haunter. We’ve got some work to do if we’re going to escape Doompuff.
HAUNTER protests!
HAUNTER wants CANDY for it!
MIKE: Yeesh Haunter…you are just too pricey to keep around sometimes…

Player: Doompuff [Record: 14-1-3] Last Battle: Win vs. Everyone (AWE #2)

Curses, all those other sites have cheap rip-offs of me, well, I’ll destroy them all! Tomorrow’s the big day, do or die.
NARRATOR suspects there will be a lot of dying WHERE-EVER DOOMPUFF goes!
You got a point.
Hmm, I haven’t seen any Transformers around here for a while.
They all ran away from AQUA VERSION!
Huh? Why’s that?
They fear the GREAT, ALL MIGHTY DOOMPUFF of course!
Kiss-up.
NARRATOR wishes to live!
NARRATOR saw what happened to RED VERSION’S ex-NARRATOR!
That was fun. About the Transformers, I figure it’s just as well. They aren’t nearly as fun to kill as humans and other creatures that bleed!
DOOMPUFF is surprisingly civil today!
Well, I’m still pooped from that huge battle, and I’m too busy trying to figure out how to get to Red Version to bother snapping at anything.
Anyway…there’s nothing alive anywhere nearby…
Except for you!
NARRATOR is a safe distance away and rapidly making it safer!
MWAHAHAHAHA!!! SOON I SHALL BE FREE TO KILL ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING I WANT! BEWARE WORLD, THE REIGN OF DOOMPUFF SHALL SOON BEGIN!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Battle #57: No More Doompuff? July 03, 2000
Setting: Aqua Version
Player: Eric, MHE  [Record: 17-12-7]  Last Battle: Loss vs. Doompuff, AWE #2

NEWSREPORTER:  The Evil Rabid Jigglypuff of Doom still does not show up on any surviving military satellites, radar systems or anything else for that matter.  It would seem that Doompuff is indeed gone.  Why the Doompuff is no longer around is anyone's guess, but perhaps answers will be found when we get the internet back up and running, then we'll be able to check the Pokébattles Network and see what happened.
WHOO-HOO!!!  You hear that?  No more Doompuff!
FANBOY:  Don't be too thrilled just yet…we're not sure if it's gone for good.
MIKE:  Come on!  It has to be gone!  I mean, just before it disappeared it had grouped all the land-masses with life still on them into one big pile so it could finish off the rest of life in Aqua Version in one fell swoop!
Yeah, what he said!  Sad to say this island Doompuff made for extermination purposes is slightly smaller than the state of Nevada and still has barren deserts of death.
Oh…hey, where'd "Digi-Man" ever get to?
FANBOY:  Doompuff ate him!
Did you push him at Doompuff by any chance?
FANBOY:  …yes…
That's ok.  I was thinking Fanboy…I think we should join up again.  I could those "Pokémon" of yours and…
FANBOY says no way!
FANBOY wants to fight!
Mike!  Help me out here!
MIKE says fight your own battles!
FANBOY sent out CAPTAIN KIRK!
…desperate are you?
FANBOY reminds you that he was in AQUA WAR EVENT #2 just like YOU!
Ok then.  Go Jigglypuff!
The enemy makes dramatic pauses all the time!  Get'm JIGGLYPUFF!
Enemy CAPTAIN KIRK used PHASER!
JIGGLYPUFF is paralyzed!
It might not be able to attack!  But it probably still can!
Jigglypuff, body slam!
JIGGLYPUFF says no!
JIGGLYPUFF used SING!
Enemy CAPTAIN KIRK fell asleep!
I wonder why it didn't put everyone to sleep…no matter, how should we finish him off Jigglypuff?
JIGGLYPUFF used FIRE BLAST!
Enemy CAPTAIN KIRK fainted!
I don't see why we bother to beat them up after they fall asleep…I mean, they're unconscious either way.
FANBOY sent out VELOCIRAPTOR!
Uh…looks tough, you can take it though Jigglypuff!
Enemy VELOCIRAPTOR looks at JIGGLYPUFF hungrily and sharpens CLAWS!
JIGGLYPUFF screams in terror and hops back in its POKéBALL!
Coward…
JIGGLYPUFF wants to know if you would fight something with huge claws if you were pop-able!
Uh…I guess not.
JIGGLYPUFF says exactly!
All right…Go Arbok!
The enemy is a walking blade factory!  Get'm ARBOK!
Wrap attack!
ARBOK looks at VELOCIRAPTOR nervously!
ARBOK used WRAP!
ARBOK wrapped enemy VELOCIRAPTOR a PRESENT!
Enemy VELOCIRAPTOR opened the PRESENT!
ggaaaaaahhhhh….Arbok….
PRESENT exploded with a cloud of KNOCK-OUT GAS!
Enemy VELOCIRAPTOR fainted!
Oh…good Arbok!  Nice thinking!
FANBOY is frustrated!
FANBOY sent out the last TRANSFORMER in AQUA VERSION!  …TANKORR!
FANBOY commands TANKORR to destroy ARBOK!
TANKORR refuses!
TANKORR used KEY TO VECTOR SIGMA on FANBOY!  …and ran away!
TANKORR says he's never coming back to this nut house!
FANBOY was turned into a solid block of metal and died!
WAAHH!!!  Now I'll never be back to 12 personalities…

Battle #58: Ruler of Aqua July 03, 2000
Setting: Aqua Version
Player: Sabrina [Record: 3-5-1]  Last Battle:  Loss vs. Doompuff, AWE #2

*singing*  No more Evil Doompuff!  No more Evil Doompuff!  No more Evil Doompuff!
NARRATOR is once again RULER of AQUA VERSION!
NARRATOR is happy!
What makes you say you rule Aqua Version?
BECAUSE…
Well…NARRATOR does work for WEBMASTER!  …but no longer has anything to fear from any characters!
I'd like to dispute that.  You've run from me before.
That was because DOOMPUFF was still around!
If NARRATOR wasted its energy and attention battling lesser beings DOOMPUFF could have snuck up behind it during BATTLE or while it was weak!
NARRATOR wasn't going to take that chance!
Really?  I find that a half-backed excuse.
NARRATOR is in a good mood today!
NARRATOR suggests SABRINA take advantage of it and leave while she can!
You talk awfully big.  …loud too.  I think we may just be better off without a Narrator shouting everything out.
NARRATOR tires of this!
NARRATOR will teach SABRINA, a mere mortal, some RESPECT!
NARRATOR wants to fight!
Ok, let's do this one-on-one!  Me vs. you, no Pokémon sent out, no trees materializing out of nowhere, nothing like that, ok?
SABRINA overestimates the usefulness of PSYCHIC POWER!
NARRATOR will humor her though!
CONFUSION!
SABRINA used CONFUSION!  Whoo…pretty STARS….
GROUND…way down there…what me doing up here?  OW!
Why'd I…OW!
Heh.  All talk, no…
NARRATOR is no longer confused!
NARRATOR says you'll pay for that!
SABRINA fainted!
Did not!  You lie!
Confusion again!
NARRATOR quickly used NOTE CARDS!
NARRATOR was struck by CONFUSION!
Whoo…hey…OW!  …what are these?
NOTE CARDS READ:  Don't hit self.  Hurt Sabrina-the girl down there with glowing eyes.
Ah!  NARRATOR is no longer confused!
NARRATOR used LIGHTNING BOLT!
Ha, you call that an attack?  Not a problem for my psychic shield.
Hmmm….SABRINA is only mildly SINGED!
NARRATOR needs to rethink STRATEGY!
Psywave attack!
NARRATOR evaded attack!
NARRATOR says your aim sucks!
So do your jokes, sense of humor, tact, and singing voice.
NARRATOR is annoyed!
NARRATOR used OMNI-STRIKE!
Critical hit!
Ow…  I never expected you to actually have power.  Looks like I can't go easy on you any more.
MEGA PSYCHIC BLAST!
YOWWW!!!  NARRATOR is feeling PAIN!
NARRATOR doesn't like PAIN!
Soon SABRINA will learn some new definitions of PAIN!
Really?  Ultra psychic blast!
WHOOAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! 
*THUD*
NARRATOR hit something hard!
NARRATOR is enraged!
NARRATOR used EARTHQUAKE!
Too easy.
Grr.…SABRINA is LEVITATING!
NARRATOR used REALITY MANIPULATION!
GRAVITY increased 20 FOLD!
SABRINA hit the ground hard and splatted!
Not…quite true….I'm still…solid….
NARRATOR returns gravity to normal!
NARRATOR used MEGA THROW!
SABRINA was thrown into the distance!
SABRINA fainted!
NARRATOR wins!
NARRATOR is the champion!

Battle #59: Desert of Despair July 03, 2000
Setting: Aqua Version
Player: Mike [Record: 16-8-5] Last battle:  Loss vs. Doompuff, AWE #2

The Skull Mike battles in this Battle is a creation by Mr. Graves, who also co-wrote Fanbattle #24, and is with me in Team Rocket in the upcoming Green Version festival.

Ally HAUNTER says you took a WRONG TURN!
That much is obvious!  Otherwise we wouldn't be out here in the Doompuff Death Desert.
Yeesh this place is gross.  I don't know how Nevada lived here or Bob stood it for as long as he did.
NO LIFE can be seen for MILES!
Anyone who read The Pokébattles Fanfic 2000 would already know what this place looks like.
TRUE!
Haunter, how's the water?
Ally HAUNTER looks nervous!
Haunter…
Ally HAUNTER says he dropped it!
ALL OF IT?!?!!
Ally HAUNTER says NO!
Ally HAUNTER says it used some!
YOU'RE A GHOST POKéMON!  A BLOB OF GAS!  WHAT THE HECK DO YOU NEED WATER FOR?!?!
Ally HAUNTER says it watered some plants back there and used the WATER to help style its spikes!
Also it was feeling a high DUST content so it took a BATH!
Well, you are looking more fearsome today… So, you can really brush those things?
Ally HAUNTER nods!
I suppose we should just back track…
If I knew what direction we came from…
MIKE is turning around!
ARG!!!  That corpse looks like that corpse, looks like that corpse!!  I have no idea where we came from…
Ally HAUNTER says you could use a landmark!
Sorry, but the only thing I could possibly use as a landmark would be a particularly horrifyingly dismembered body…and they're none too rare around here.
I'm going to sit down and think about this…
MIKE sat on CATTLE SKULL and got poked!
OWW!!  WHAT THE?!?!
SKULL laughs!
SKULL says that was too easy!
You mean…you wanted me to sit on you?
SKULL says that's not the important part!
SKULL says you got poked and laughs!
Oh, so you like puncturing rear ends eh?
I'm mad now!  I won't let you liv…err…well, I'll beat you up!
SKULL says you're welcome to try!
SKULL wants to fight!
MIKE sat down!
OW!!!  Why'd I do that?!?!
SKULL has mind-powers!
Oh really?  Go Charmeleon!  Barbecue us some…uh…
Go!  CHARMELEON!
Nevermind!  Just use flamethrower!
CHARMELEON sat down before it could obey orders!
CHARMELEON is hopping up and down in PAIN!
Arg…
CHARMELEON tripped on a ribcage and fell!
CHARMELEON fainted!
Why you!  Return Charmeleon, go Magikarp!
The enemy's twisted!  Get'm MAGIKARP!
Magikarp use thunder on the cattle skull!
MAGIKARP didn't have time to follow orders either!
It flopped over to and got pricked on HORN!
MAGIKARP fainted!
This could get real aggravating real fast.  Haunter, if we win this and get out of this desert alive I'll get you all the candy you want!  Now go get that skull!
Go!  HAUNTER!
SKULL used POKE!
HAUNTER "sat" on SKULL!
No effect!
HAHAHAHAHA!  Haunter, night shade!
HAUNTER used NIGHT SHADE!
HAUNTER pulled down a SHADE for the NIGHT!
NOO!!!  Um…Confuse ray!
HAUNTER used CONFUSE RAY!
Enemy SKULL is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
Enemy SKULL wants to know how it could hurt itself!
Enemy SKULL hurt itself greater in its greater confusion!
Enemy SKULL fainted!
MIKE and HAUNTER win!
Good!  Now…how do we get out of this decomposing wasteland?
Ally HAUNTER shrugs!
Haunter shr…nevermind, I'm not going to ask.

Battle #60: A New Foe July 09, 2000
Setting: Aqua Version
Player: Eric [Record: 18-12-7] Last battle: Win vs. Fanboy (Battle #57)