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In the olden days, Pokébattles.com and most Pokébattles fan sites had a page for fan-submitted battles. Here is where that will be. If you have a battle you want to submit, send it to me at my e-mail address here. All submissions are accepted regardless of format; battles will be standardized.

Fan battles and other fan content will be published up to thrice weekly on Thursday through Saturday, roughly in order received, and not more than one per week per author. Detailed submission guidelines are available here.

Red is making his way through Celadon Gym for his Rainbow Badge. But hasn't he done this before?

Battle #1: A Battle with Cause and Effect 2/24/2022
Setting: Game 50% / Reality 45% / TV 5%
Player: Red
Written by Stephen / haunter-uk, author of Sandy Version!

LASS is out of usable pokemon!
RED wins!
Charmeleon, return.
I seem to need to get rid of the tree to progress. Simple as far as gym puzzles go. Raticate, cut the tree.
RATICATE used CUT!
Director: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, cut!
...Huh?
...Huh!
Director: OK. I'm liking the basics you've got going on, but the delivery's flat. Maybe a little more emotion?
...Sure...?
Director: OK, from the top!
LASS wants to fight!
LASS sent out BELLSPROUT!
Grass type gym? Go, Charmeleon.
RED sent out CHARMELEON
Flame thrower
CHARMELEON used FLAME THROWER!
CHARMELEON thinks BELLSPROUT sucks!
CHARMELEON started a FLAME WAR!
WEEPINBELL joined the fray!
BELLSPROUT burnt to ashes!
BELLSPROUT fainted!
WEEPINBELL burnt to ashes!
WEEPINBELL fainted!
LASS is out of usable pokemon!
RED wins!
Charmeleon, return.
The tree's in my way! Good thing I have my trusty Raticate for HMs with me! Raticate, cut the tree!
RATICATE used CUT!
Director: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, cut!
...Huh?
...huh...
Director: We're still not there. Narrator, can you add more life to things?
NARRATOR is more about the DEATH!
Director: Cut the method bs, you don't need to be on when the camera's not rolling, you know what I mean.
NARRATOR will add more FUNNY!
Director: ...Good enough.
Director: OK, from the top!
LASS wants to fight!
LASS sent out BELLSPROUT!
Grass type gym? Go, Charmeleon.
RED sent out CHARMELEON
BELLSPROUT used SPROUT!
BELLSPROUT sprouted bells!
VILLAGER appeared!
VILLAGER owes a lot of money to a TANOOKI!
VILLAGER ran away with the bells!
Flame thrower
CHARMELEON used FLAME THROWER!
CHARMELEON thinks BELLSPROUT sucks!
CHARMELEON started a FLAME WAR!
WEEPINBELL joined the fray!
BELLSPROUT burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive! ASH KETCHUM fainted!
BELLSPROUT fainted!
WEEPINBELL burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive!
ASH KETCHUM died!
WEEPINBELL fainted!
LASS is out of usable pokemon!
RED wins!
Charmeleon, return.
The tree's in my way! Good thing I have my trusty Raticate for HM's with me! Raticate, cut the tree.
RATICATE used CUT!
Director: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, cut!
...huh?
...This is FAMILIAR!
Director: I think we're about there, but I'd like another option.
...option...?
...Hm...
Director: OK, from the top. No changes to the energy this time, please, this is more for the angles.
LASS wants to fight!
LASS sent out BELLSPROUT!
Grass type gym? Go, Charmeleon.
RED sent out CHARMELEON
BELLSPROUT used SPROUT!
BELLSPROUT sprouted bells!
VILLAGER appeared!
VILLAGER owes a lot of money to a TANOOKI!
VILLAGER ran away with the bells!
Flame thrower
CHARMELEON used FLAME THROWER!
CHARMELEON thinks BELLSPROUT sucks!
CHARMELEON started a FLAME WAR!
WEEPINBELL joined the fray!
BELLSPROUT burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive!
ASH KETCHUM fainted!
BELLSPROUT fainted!
WEEPINBELL burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive!
ASH KETCHUM died!
WEEPINBELL fainted!
LASS is out of usable pokemon!
RED wins!
Charmeleon, return.
The tree's in my way! Good thing I have my trusty Raticate for hm's with me! Raticate, cut the tree.
RATICATE used CUT!
Director: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, cut!
...huh? Wait...
RED has DE JA VUE!
RED can repeat that!
...huh? Wait...
Director: I thought I said cut it with the method. Both of you.
...hm?
NARRATOR doesn't seem to recall!
Director: Well, whatever. I still could use some more options for angles, so try and keep it the same this time as well
LASS wants to fight!
LASS sent out BELLSPROUT!
NARRATOR has DE JA VUE!
Narrator can repeat that.
RED isn't usually so quick witted!
Insults aside, it didn't even feel like I was making a joke, more like I was half remembering a punch line...
...Huh...
Grass type gym? Go, Charmeleon.
RED sent out CHARMELEON
BELLSPROUT used SPROUT!
BELLSPROUT sprouted bells!
VILLAGER appeared!
VILLAGER owes a lot of money to a TANOOKI!
VILLAGER ran away with the bells!
Flame thrower
CHARMELEON used FLAME THROWER!
CHARMELEON thinks BELLSPROUT sucks!
CHARMELEON started a FLAME WAR!
WEEPINBELL joined the fray!
BELLSPROUT burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive! ASH KETCHUM fainted!
BELLSPROUT fainted!
WEEPINBELL burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive!
ASH KETCHUM died!
WEEPINBELL fainted!
LASS is out of usable pokemon!
RED wins!
!
Charmeleon, return.
Wai--
The tree's in my way! Good thing I have my trusty Raticate for hm's with me! Raticate, cut the tree.
RATICATE used CUT!
Director: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, cut!
...Huh?
NARRATOR is in a PUN LOOP!
Director: Not sure what was going on at the start, but that was still nice. Maybe cut the improv stuff this time?
What's a pun loop?
Like a TIME LOOP but with a PUN!
NARRATOR and RED are VAGUELY remembering small bits from past ITERATIONS of the LOOP!
Director: I have no clue what weird method skit you're doing right now, but I thought I told you to cut it.
Oh!
CUT!
RED needs to not use CUT!
Director: OK, from the top!
LASS wants to fight!
LASS sent out BELLSPROUT!
NARRATOR has DE JA VUE!
Narrator can repeat that.
RED isn't usually so quick witted!
Insults aside, it didn't even feel like I was making a joke, more like I was half remembering a punch line...
...Hmm...
Grass type gym? Go, Charmeleon.
RED sent out CHARMELEON
BELLSPROUT used SPROUT!
BELLSPROUT sprouted bells!
VILLAGER appeared!
VILLAGER owes a lot of money to a TANOOKI!
VILLAGER ran away with the bells!
Flame thrower
CHARMELEON used FLAME THROWER!
CHARMELEON thinks BELLSPROUT sucks!
CHARMELEON started a FLAME WAR!
WEEPINBELL joined the fray!
BELLSPROUT burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive! ASH KETCHUM fainted!
BELLSPROUT fainted!
WEEPINBELL burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive!
ASH KETCHUM died!
WEEPINBELL fainted!
LASS is out of usable pokemon!
RED wins!
RED should consider doing the run to POKEMON CENTER after every BATTLE thing!
Nah. Maybe in a few battles when the PP starts running low, but Charmeleon didn't take any damaged.
Even managed to cause two pokemon to faint with one PP that time, not used to your puns working in my favour, but I'll take it.
Some of them felt... Weirdly familiar, though...
And that's why RED should visit the POKEMON CENTER rather than--
Oh, the gym puzzle's a bunch of trees. That's easy! Raticate, cut!
AAAARRRRGH!
RATICATE used CUT!
Director: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, cut!
...huh...?
THIS is why RED should have retreated to the POKEMON CENTER!
Director: I have no clue what you were playing at at the end, there, Narrator. We have to do that one over.
NARRATOR needs to STOP RED!
What did I do?
Director: OK, from the top.
LASS wants to fight!
LASS sent out BELLSPROUT!
NARRATOR has DE JA VUE!
Narrator can repeat that.
RED isn't usually so quick witted!
Insults aside, it didn't even feel like I was making a joke, more like I was half remembering a punch line...
Oh god!
Huh?
...Uhh...
NARRATOR isn't feeling too good!
NARRATOR would like to do this ANOTHER DAY!
Quit your whining, you never let me out of Battles when I'm not feeling too good.
Plus when I'm not feeling too good is usually your fault!
Anyway. Go, Charmeleon.
RED will have it NARRATOR's way, then!
RED sent out CHARMELEON
BELLSPROUT used SPROUT!
BELLSPROUT sprouted bells!
VILLAGER appeared!
VILLAGER owes a lot of money to a TANOOKI!
VILLAGER ran away with the bells!
Flame thrower.
CHARMELEON used FLAME THROWER!
CHARMELEON threw lame F-BOMBS!
UNDEAD RSACi CLOUD appeared!
UNDEAD RSACi CLOUD used LIGHTNING!
CHARMELEON fainted!
UNDEAD RSACi CLOUD ran away!
...Kay then...
Hm... Plant, maybe it'll work like a tree...
Raticate, go!
RED sent out RATICATE!
...Wait!
Raticate, cut!
...goddamnit...
RATICATE used CUT!
Director: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, cut!
...huh...?
NARRATOR tried to do this GENTLY!
Director: What the hell do you think you're playing at, this was meant to be an easy win because that makes it funnier when the battle with Erika to go sideways for him!
NARRATOR tried to be POLITE!
NARRATOR is tried of this HALF REMEMBERED nonsense!
NARRATOR tried to fix that typo!
NARRATOR is too tried to!
Director: Whatever, we'll just have to do this over.
NARRATOR will just have to cause RED to die!
Wait, what?!
Director: OK, from the top!
LASS wants to fight!
LASS sent out BELLSPROUT!
NARRATOR has DE JA VUE!
Narrator can repeat that.
RED isn't usually so quick witted!
...Oh...
Insults aside, it didn't even feel like I was making a joke, more like I was half remembering a punch line...
...No more MR NICE NARRATOR!
When were you ever nice?
Anyway, Go, Charmeleon.
RED sent out CHARMELEON
BELLSPROUT used SPROUT!
BELLSPROUT sprouted bells!
VILLAGER appeared!
VILLAGER owes a lot of money to a TANOOKI!
VILLAGER ran away with the bells!
Flame thrower
CHARMELEON used FLAME THROWER!
CHARMELEON thinks BELLSPROUT sucks!
CHARMELEON started a FLAME WAR!
WEEPINBELL joined the fray!
BELLSPROUT burnt to ashes!
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive!
ASH KETCHUM fainted!
ASH KETCHUM is the counterpart of RED in the ANIME!
ASH KETCHUM is, therefore, RED!
Wait, wh--
RED fainted!
(What was that for?)
BELLSPROUT fainted!
WEEPINBELL burnt to ashes!
(I've lost isn't that en--)
ASH KETCHUM was burnt alive!
ASH KETCHUM died!
(...Why are you doing this)
RED caused NARRATOR suffering!
(What did I do?!)
RED died!
CHARMELEON's attack kept going!
CELADON GYM fainted!
NARRATOR is still annoyed!
NARRATOR looks for more MORTALS to TORTURE!
NARRATOR ran away!
Director: Narrator's are so cute, aren't they?
Director: They think they're omnipotent, but they're really not. Caught in a pun loop of all things!
It's what makes them so fun to play with.
But between you and me, we both know who really pulls the omnipotent thing off, right?
Q: Moi.

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