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Battle 31

Title: insert name of choice here!
Location: Jail for Evil illumina version Narrators
Player: Shadowy Figure

Now to steal the Opal Orangutan... Hey... Wait a minute, where am I?
Shadowy Figure is in Jail for EVIL illumina Version Narrators!
illumina version... I've heard of that somewhere... Oh yea.. That second rate rip-off site with the lazy webmaster who never updates.
Narrator thinks you should watch what you say in the illumina Version!
arg, you got off lucky this time...
Old Evil illumina Version narrator: Everyone gets lucky all the time, seeing how LAZY the webmaster is!!
I'm with you, you were always cooler than the webmaster!
Old Evil illumina Version narrator: If i'm so cool then why am I in Jail?
hey.. you're right!
Shadowy figure sees sign!
Sign says incase of inexplicable urge to free Evil illumina version narrators from jail... Use plastic explosives!
Shadowy figure sees plastic explosives above sign!
Shadowy figure used plastic explosives!
um... hello? Webmaster? Some stuff going on here...
uh oh, I guess I have to do things for myself...
into shark infested waters!
Evil Villian threw masterball at shadowy figure!
hey! What're you doing?! NOO!@
Evil Villian Caught shadowy figure!

Player: Evil Villian

What? Making me a player isn't going to help you, narrator!
Evil Villian fell off a cliff!
hahahaha... Amateur... I'm a disembodied voice, gravity doesnt effect me!
Evil Villian is flying!
In the wrong direction!
Evil Villian flew into cliff wall!
haha, idiot, there are no cliff's around here!
Cliff appeared!
Doompuff appeared!
Cliff Screams in terror!
Cliff was snapped in half by doompuff!
Evil Villian was snapped in half by doompuff!
Fool! I can not be hurt by physical means!
Evil Villian is losing sensation in his legs!
What? How?
Evil Villian is confused!
Evil Villian hurt-
The narrator in it's confusion!
The narrator in it's confusion!
Ouch! Hey! Gr...!
Evil Villian fell into vat of reality altering Liquid!
hahaha, do your worst!
Evil villian is no longer disembodied!
Doompuff snapped Evil Villian in half!
Narrator is feeling merciful!
Doompuff missed!
you will rue the day you took mercy on me!
Evil Villian ran away!
By illumina@graalmail.com

Battle 32: A throne retaken...

Player: Evil Villain

Evil Villain is sitting in Hideout!
PokeMan appeared!
PokeMan: Die Evil Scum!
What? You want to challenge me?! Mwahahaha...
Go! Shadowy Figure!
Shadowy Figure: shadow! figure! ure! Shad! hey... Wait a minute! I'm not a pokemon! Ahh!!!
Shadowy Figure is running away!
Shadowy Figure ran away and into PokeMan's fist!
Shadowy Figure fainted!
Useless cur...
If you want something done right, then you have to do it yourself
The enemy stands for truth,justice, and the japenese way! Go! Evil Villian!
Evil Villian used Mwahahahaha!
It's not very effective...
grr... prepare to die!
Pokeman is preparing!
Pokeman is standing in front of 6 ft deep Pokeman shaped hole!
Pokeman is holding a flower!
Pokeman is psychically holding up enough dirt to completely fill a 6ft deep pokeman shaped hole!
Evil Villian threw a feather at Pokeman!
Pokeman sneezed and buried himself!
It's still standing...
what??!? grr... Evil Villian Super punch!
Attack Failed!
grr... sure, just because i'm your arch-nemesis and he's a super hero your going to treat me unfairly and give him the advantage right?
Argh! Die Pokeman!
Pokeman died!
But pokman remains!
grr... you stupid, cheap, lazy narrator!
I'm retaking my throne!
Muahahaha! I'll fight you, you can not beat me, a narrator, even if you used to be a narrator you no longer have access to the same powers!
Pokman's was replaced with an e!
Pokeman was shoved aside to fight in the flaming rolling painful battle dome of death with a doompuff and about 100 allies to help fight him!
Mayhem occurs!
illumina Version ratings greatly increased!
well if you like that then you should love the battle between me and the old narrator!
Audience: Boo! Boo!
Audience: DeathCage! DeathCage!
No, really thats not at all interesting!
Camera view changed to peaceful hilltop with a tree on top of it and a nearby cliff. Wild Pokemon are walking around munching on grass and stuff.
Stupid Narrator, you have no idea how to entertain the audience!
illumina Version ratings greatly fell!
Narrator Sent out Psyduck of Psychiatric doom!
Don't you think all the wierd doom-puff beasts are getting a bit out of hand?
Silence! you!!
Muahaha! who do you think I am that you can talk to me like that!
you are a cheezy,lazy, demented, narrator who tried to destroy the illumina version with dumb plots and finally crossed the line when you tried to destroy the main character!
yea, yea, flattery will get you nowhere!
go! Al Gore!
The enemy is another cheap rip-off of Doom Puff! go! al gore!
PoPD! use your accidentily suggest that suicide is the answer to all your problems attack!
Al gore! don't give up! Come back with an "I invented the internet!" attack!
Psyduck is laughing!
Psyduck has no air!
Psyduck fainted!
haha! you still have no chance in heck of beating me!
you say heck?
HaHa!!! Why don't you say HELL like a normal person?!
ahh!! please dont curse around me!!
Evil villian used Very Extremely Mild expletives!
Temporary Narrator's text became red!
Narrator Fainted!
Evil Villian gained 665 exps!
Muahaha! just one more exp. and I will evolve!
Evil Villian killed LV -22 Magikarp!
Evil villian gained 1 exp. point!
Evil villian grew to level 99!
What! Evil Villian is evolving!
Evil Villian evolved into NewNarrator!
Narrator was renamed to Oldnarrator!
Oldnarrator woke up!
OldNarrator: I must warn the webmaster!
OldNarrator ran away!
NewNarrator was renamed to Narrator!
By illumina@graalmail.com

Battle 33: Gauntlet Legends

Player: Brandon

Brandon is taking a break from pokemon training!
Yea, and it was supposed to be a break from Pokebattles too, Darnit!
Narrator is trying to annoy Brandon!
Yea, Yea, Just get on with the plot already...
Just for that I'm going to be even more evil and merciless today!
Ally Chris appeared!
hmm.. Nice to meet you Chris.
You have known Chris for 2 years!
I have? oh, oh yeah! I have!
so, What's up?
Brandon is playing Gauntlet legends!
Brandon's ability to pay attention to anything happening within the world greatly fell!
Chris: I read that when you gather about 13 of any form of runes on the night of the Eclyptic apocolypse, then that world connects with another world...
Really? How interesting...
C'mon, C'mon, Almost there, almost to the 13th rune!
Chris: I also read that the moon turns chartruese on that night!
Really? Chartruese huh? Yes! I got the 13th rune!
What! Moon is evolving!
Moon Evolved into chartreuse moon!
hmm... that sounds a bit familiar!
Chris ran away!
huh? What's the matter?
Moon Sent out Whirly portal thingy!
Green Valkyrie and Red Warrior appeared!
Green Valkyrie and Red Warrior move into living room!
Argh! Another Videogame that I'm never going to want to play again! This is why I dont play pokemon on Game boy anymore!
Green Valkyrie: By the glorious light of my shimmering blade, I shall crush thee Red warrior!
Arg, Take it outside you two!
Red Warrior: What's this? Someone Dares challenge our honorable Duel!
Green Valkyrie: How dare thy! Have thou no honor?!
um... if you say so...
Red Warrior: I think it tis our destiny that we ally and teach this lowly scum a lesson in true honor!
Green Valkyrie: Yay. I shalt agree to that!
hey, Wait a minute!
Red Warrior: Quiet thy lowly mouth, peasent!
Green Valkyrie: By the vast tactical machine that art my brain I shall crush thee with my blade which shimmers like the awe-inspiring beauty of my face!
Red Warrior: Prepare to die! Thou who be foul and retched!
Red Warrior used throw unlimited number of red swords!
Green Valkyrie used throw unlimited number of green swords!
grr... fine, I'll play along!
Go! Chimera!
Red Warrior: Thy monster is as retched and as evil as thy who art without honor!
Green Valkyrie: Thy monster is as evil and as retched as my form is graceful and I shall destroy it with my glimmering blade whoes very beauty causes the almighty webmaster himself to become humble before me!
hmm... heh, uh oh... I think they just beat themselves.
Almighty Webmaster appeared!
Almighty Webmaster is angry!
Red Warrior: This illusion tis unreal as thine face is retched, Brandon!
Argh!! Will you stop it with the insults already!
Green Valkyrie: This illusion shall not last long against the glowing blade of pure power wielded by arms that could hold the heavens up, if so they chose!
Almighty Webmaster used Almighty Webmaster powers!
Almighty Webmaster gave the battle a 1 rating!
Almighty Webmaster dissappeared!
illumina Version webmaster decided never to use green valkyrie or red warrior ever again!
Green Valkyrie and Red warrior were transported back to the gauntlet legends realm!
*phew* Glad that's all over...
Chimera wants to fight!
What?! ARGH...
By illumina@graalmail.com

Battle34: The Return of Red Warrior and Green Valkyrie... er...

Player: Brandon

Chimera wants to fight!
Gr... You dare challenge your Master!!
Chimera says you are not nearly any sort of master!
What! You dare call me, um, er, a non-Master person!!
Chimera says you are beginning to sound like Green Valkyrie!
Brandon has become possesed!
What! That is a lie! It is as false as I am a True-Master!
Chimera is scared!
Chimera doesn't want to fight!
What?!?! That is a lie! Face your death, thou foul creature, for I shall
crush you by the Shiny Green Armor of the Green Valkyrie who's beauty is unmatched
near and far!!
Chimera is Terrified!
Chimera is about to die!
What?! Lies! All Lies I tell you! Prepare to die!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
Chimera is confused!
Chimera dodged the sky lance in it's confusion!
Foolish Vile Narrator! Prepare to die!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
It Missed!
Arg! Prepare to die thou evil wretch!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
It Missed!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
It Missed!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
It Missed!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
It Missed!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
It Missed!
Brandon used Sky Lance!
It Missed!
No PP left for this move!
Guh... arg...
Brandon Fainted!
Green Valkyrie Fainted!
Red Warrior Fainted!
Chimera says ...
Kita says ...
Kita Says um... hello?
Chimera says urrh, hi...
Kita says hmm...
Chimera says What happened to the plot?
Plot fainted!
Chimera: you know you gotta notice these things when they happen narrator...
Kita: So... What happens now?
Chimera: I dont know, hey did you notice the Narrator stopped narrating!
Kita: Hey! The Narrator fainted!
illumina Version Webmaster: oops, left the battle running!
Kita: Gah!! Don't do that! You could give someone a heart attack,
sneaking up on someone like that...
illumina Version Webmaster: Battle! use your End attack!
Narrator Woke up!
Battle used End!
Battle ended!
Plot Woke up!
illumina Version Webmaster: d'oh, Figures...
By illumina@graalmail.com

Battle 35: New Narrator, er... Again?!

Player: Giovanni

Yes, My Plans are beginning to unfurl... soon, illumina Version will be all mine!!!
Why would you want illumina Version?
Shut up foolish narrator.
eep, okay!
Blast, this New Narrator is way too Timid.
um.. er.. well, um do you, er want to make something of it?
not really...
um... well, ok then... uh...
Evil Villian: Evil Villian Appeared!
Ack! Not my arch-rival!
This should be interesting...
Evil Villian: I have figured out a way to destroy you, no matter how Almighty you are!!!
EVil Villian has not!
Evil Villian: Then Prove it!
Evil Villian: Chicken!
Am not!
Evil Villian: Then Prove it!
Evil Villian: Chicken!
Am not!
Evil Villian: Then Prove it!
Evil Villian: Chicken!
Am not!
um... guys?
Evil Villian: WHAT?!
err, um what?
illumina Version's Visitor's Greatly Decreased!
Maybe you should spend more time fighting or something.
Evil Villian: WHO SAYS?!
Evil Villian: eep, ok...
Evil Villian wants to fight!
Evil Villian: Prepare to die Foolish Narrator!
Narrator sent out Hero!
Evil Villian sent out Evil Villian!
Evil Villian: hey! I never said that! oh well... Never mind... Me! use your Corruption Attack!
Me: Hey Hero, why don't you join the dark side? Our organization shall get you Money,Power,long-term life insurance, and various other things that shouldn't be mentioned on a G-Rated Site!
Hero: Hm... life insurance...
Critical Hit!
Hero is fully corrupted!
Hero's Evilness greatly increased!
Gr... Go! Narrator!
Evil Villian: Evil Villian Caught Hero!
Evil Villian: Do you wish to give a nickname to Hero?
Evil Villian: V-I-L-L-I-A-N
Evil Villian: Oh, I'm sorry, did you say something?
gr... Go! Narrator!
Evil Villian: Evil Villian! use your Spell of Ultimate Narrating Destruction attack!
Evil Villian used SOUND!
Evil Villian: er... Sound? oh... I see... You freak! you included "of" in that!
Sticks and stones...
Evil Villian: Shut up and narrate!
um, ok.
Ally Missingno. Appeared!
Evil Villian: Bweheeheehee! Missingno. Use your Glitch Attack!
Missingno. UseD gLiiiiiiiitch itch itch tch at tatatatatatat ack!
Nyararatir wurz fufufufullllly glited!
GliGliGliGLitchhc curzed nrtr to fnt!
EvEvEvilail vilin: ReRereReturnereer Mimimimiisfdsifgsgno.
Evil Villian: And now with the Narrator fainted I shall become the almighty Narrator of the illumina Version once again!
Evil Villian: What! Evil Villian is evolving!
Evil Villian: Evil Villian ev
Evil Villian: into Narra
Finally, Maybe now we can get this battle underway!
Mwahahaha! I! Have! The Power!
Yes, now about the pokebattle...
Bweeheehee! This battle is long overdue for an ending!
Battle Ended!
By illumina@graalmail.com
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