Battles 6-10 (Will the real Main Villain please stand up?)

Well, in the course of these five battles I introduce three villains, none of whom are very original. (Things are going to change real soon.) I decided I needed to get rid of two, so after the "Smooth Eddie" battle, I have them face off. In the end, one's dead (Or so the narrator says), one's ran away, and one's the main villain.

The Red Version, although you must've been there before.... Go anyway.

Back to the Current Battles with you!

Viridian Version Archives: Battles 1-5

Battle #6: Doompuff strikes! Wel, not really... Location: Back Alley Player: Tatewaki Kuno [2-1-0] So... why am I here again? TATEWAKI KUNO walked HERE! You made me! Oh, yeah. THIS IS STUPID! I'M OUT OF HERE! SEE YA! KUNO runs away! A large, DOOMPUFF-shaped object is in his way! What? Doompuff? GAAAAAAAH! GET IT AWAY! .... Wait..... It's sorta small... FIGURE reveals itself! FIGURE was re-named CLICHED DOOMPUFF! Cliched Doompuff? What? CLICHED DOOMPUFF is the VICTIM of A UNIMAGINATIVE WEBMASTER! ... Or maybe he's just a SATIRE! I'm going with the satire one. Well, anyway, get out of my way! I must go defeat Ranma! At this rate, KUNO will never even reach RANMA! And who's fault is that? CLICHED DOOMPUFF wants to fight! I said.... Oh, forget it. Get'm, KUNO! I will, just you wait! NEW NARRATOR waits! NEW NARRATOR is sick of waiting! CLICHED DOOMPUFF used JIGGLY DISORIENTATION! ..."Jiggly Disorientation"? Dizzy..... That's the POINT! CLICHED DOOMPUFF used RABID NIBBLE! This is needlessly stupid. GET OFF OF ME! KUNO used BOKKEN TAP! It's super irrelevant! CLICHED DOOMPUFF fainted! Heh. Defeated by the.... Uh.... Thing........ You know what I mean. Well, anyway, I have to go defeat Ranma now. KUNO will never fight RANMA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU! ... Uh huh. I think you said that before. Yeah. We should end this now, or something? My god, who are you, and where is a competent narrator? NEW NARRATOR reminds you that a COMPETEN NARRATOR would be torturing you right now! Oh, um, yes, carry on. KUNO walked off into the sunset! KUNO was burned! ...Ow. So you are a competent narrator, after all.....

Battles 6-10 Battles 11-15 Battles 16-20 War Event #1 Battles 21-25 Battles 26-30 Battle Royale #1 Battles 31-35

Battle #7: Extra's Lament Location: Grassy Field Player: Cool Trainer Myron [No Record] MYRON is searching for POKEMON! Yeah. That explains me being in a Grassy Field. Idiot. MYRON has made a big MISTAKE! So... I'm not in a Grassy Field? CLIVE sighs! MYRON doesn't seem very cool! I know that. My parents named me "Cool Traner" as an attempt to get me to be one. MYRON is knocked down from behind by SOMEONE! OW! Who did that? SOMONE was re-named EVIL PESTICIDE-LAIDEN GRAPEFRUIT of DOOM! So his name in short is "Doomfruit?" MYRON snickers! DOOMFRUIT is not amused! DOOMFRUIT wants to fight! Bring it on, Fruity! Go, Graveler! GRAVELER, I choose you! No you don't. I did. Well, anyway Graveler, use Rock Slide! GRAVELER used ROCK SLIDE! GRAVELER is SLIDING... down a hill! WHAT? Okay, that wasn't funny! Yes it was! DOOMFRUIT used CITRIC ACID! DOOMFRUIT sprayed CITRIC ACID on MYRON! Mmm, citrus! ... Wait.... IT BURNS! AAAAAAAH! GRAVELER is back! About time! Citric Acid is eating away at my skin! HELP! GRAVELER is confused! It hurt MYRON in it's confusion! That's never happened before...Sigh. GRAVELER, RETURN! GRAVELER, return! MYRON ran away! I FREAKING KNOW THAT, OKAY? DOOMFRUIT laughs evily! DOOMFRUIT  goes off to look for someone who can stand a snowball's chance! Wait... I didn't even stand a Snowball's chance in hell? Wah. SNOWBALL missed it's chance! That makes no sense. These puns really suck. MYRON fainted for no reason! Use next pathetic cannon-fodder?

Battle # 8: The battle of one-too-many references! Location: Remote area near Furinkan High Player: Joe Blow [1-2-0] Huh? Wha? JOE BLOW is awake! Yeah. I am. Now what? Look at the TITLE! Oh, no... Oh, yes! POKEBALL appears! That weak little thing? POKEBALL was re-named HEAVILY-ARMED POKEBALL! NO! I thought we reached our all-time low when a fan-made Doompuff appeared, but this is ridiculous! POKEBALL is HEAVILY ARMED! I am not going to go through with this. JOE BLOW has no choice! Yes I do! I'll knock myself out! Then I won't have to participate in this stupid battle! KASPAROV: A stalemate! Wha... NO! WE'RE NOT RIPPING OFF RED VERSION CHARACTERS! KASPAROV is sent back to BLACK VERSION! Black Version, Red Version, whatever. JOE BLOW is going to fight! I am not. YES, you ARE! You can't make me. Actually, CLIVE can! What's with referring to yourself in the third person? ... HEAVILY ARMED POKEBALL is firing at JOE BLOW! STOP CALLING IT A HEAVILY ARMED POKEBALL! WE'LL TICK OFF THE AQUA WEBMASTER! ....Fine. Can we at least rip off Red? NO! THIS HAS GOT TO BE THE STUPIDEST BATTLE EVER! Didn't you read Battle #4? ...Oh. Forget this, I'm outta here! JOE BLOW RAN AWAY! HAP: I'll get that twerp next time! HAP used EVIL LAUGHTER! It's super creepy!

Battle #9: Dating Disaster Location: Chez Mocha Latte Player: Smooth Eddie [No Record] All right... A night alone with a sexay lady! SMOOTH EDDIE is a PERVERT! Yeah, it's obvious by my obnoxious accent....  Eeeeey! SEXAY... er, SEXY LADY wants to know if you will order! All right... The lady will have beer... and I will have beer. NARRATOR thinks that the VIRIDIAN WEBMASTER shouldn't write while watching the DREW CAREY SHOW! ...You shouldn't break the fourth wall! ...Eeeey! SMOOTH EDDIE is already annoying! WAITER brings BEER! Awright! SMOOTH EDDIE drinks BEER! Eeeeey! .... This is bad! WAITER explains that this is HOMEMADE BEER! UGH! I wanna talk to da chef! CHEF appears! Eeeey! Your beer sucks! CHEF is insulted! CHEF wants to fight! ....Okaaaaaaaaay! Enemy CHEF sent out BREAD! Go, SMOOTH EDDIE! ...Um..... I'll eat it! BREAD is loafing around! SMOOTH EDDIE used EAT! It's super delicious! ENEMY CHEF sent out CHEF! AWRIGHT! I shall defeat you! Enemy CHEF was melted, shot, and disoriented at the same time! Enemy CHEF died! SMOOTH EDDIE gained 1 EXP! HAP appeared! CLICHED DOOMPUFF appeared! DOOMFRUIT appeared! ...Eeeeep! Let's go, my sweet! SEXY LADY left a long time ago! SMOOTH EDDIE is frozen in place in fear! HAP: So... you two are the other villains? DOOMFRUIT: Yeah. .... Listen, there are too many villains here. CLICHED DOOMPUFF: I noticed. Therefore, I shall eliminate both of you! .........Help....

Battle #10: When weak villains clash. Location: Chez Mocha Latte Player: Heavily Armed Pokeball [0-1-1] Now I will defeat you two pathetic Doompuff spinoffs! CLICHED DOOMPUFF: And you're better? Yeah, I'm an Heavily-Armed Clown spinoff! DOOMFRUIT: Feh. I am the most original! SMOOTH EDDIE: ... Can I go now? No. CLICHED DOOMPUFF: I cannot lose! I was trained on the Planet of the Doompuffs to destroy this version, due to it and I being very weak... Viridian's ranked #12. CLICHED DOOMPUFF: BAH! IT DOES NOT MATTER! Now, in the name of the Doompuff revolution, DIE! CLICHED DOOMPUFF used DIE! CLICHED DOOMPUFF is DEAD! CLICHED DOOMPUFF: What? No fair! It is FAIR! DOOMFRUIT: Good. That baka would just get in the way, now it is just you and me. Yeah, but you won't defeat me, for I am heavily armed! HAP is HEAVILY ARMED! HAP's ARMS are HEAVY! I predicted that! But, you see, I have no arms! ... Wait... Aww, man! CLICHED DOOMPUFF: Serves you right. Shut up. DOOMFRUIT used CITRIC ACID! HAP's arms MELTED! I DON'T HAVE ARMS! The guns, you moron! ...WHAT? Well, I'll use my catch attack! HAP was re-named POKEBALL! POKEBALL used CATCH! POKEBALL caught SMOOTH EDDIE! AAAAH! Forget it, I'm outta here! POKEBALL left! POKEBALL IS BOUNCING OFF AGAIN! DOOMFRUIT: HA HA HA! Nobody opposes me anymore! CLICHED DOOMPUFF: I do. DOOMFRUIT: You're dead. So nobody opposes me! KUNO appeared! ZARBON appeared! MYRON appeared! JOE BLOW appeared! LARRY appeared! DUBBIE appeared... er, never mind! DOOMFRUIT: ... Oh. Well.... anyway, I'm going to make evil plans.... I SHALL BE BACK! ZARBON: ... We know... Ergh.