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My collection of non-pokebattles fanfiction, much of it dark...
DARK VERSION IS
AT:
A Numerical point
between #1 and #X, where X equals the number of sites currently competing in the
network:
Dark Version
Home of Team Rocket, The Horde,
Black Version, and all the Video Game Villians you could shake a stick at...
Dark Version Records:
A win/lose/draw record of each character that has participated
in all Dark Version Battles to date, followed by a list of the battles in which the
character has participated in. Battles within Fanfics do not count towards records.
Team Rocket
Bill: 0:1:0 | 3, 14, F1
Butch & Cassidy: 0:1:0 | 15
Deven: 5:6:1 | T1,
11, 14, 18, F1, 21, 24, 27
Jessie: 5:6:1 | 7, 10, T1, 11, 14, 18, F1, 21, 24,
27
Simon the Lumberjack: 0:2:0 | 16, 24
Dead/Captured
Editor: 2:3:2 | 1, 4, 5, 6, 7, T1, 17, F1
James: 0:2:1 | 7, 12
Oak: 0:4:0 | 4, 8, 13, 17, F1
Red Warriora: 43:0:0 | 19, F1
Tree Man: 2:0:0 | 16, 20, F1
Yellow Archera: 0:0:0 | 19, F1
Other
Anarrator: 2:1:0 | 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 8, 13, 17, 18, 19, 20, F1,
21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27
Ash: 0:1:0 | 15
Baa'gryl: 1:0:0 | 26
Cranky Bob: 1:1:0 | 10, 12
Da Evolution Mana: 0:1:0 | 20, F1
Dark Doompuff: 2:0:0 | 18, F1
Engineer: 0:0:1 | 11
Garrett: 7:6:2 | 2, 3, 6, 7, T1, 12, 16, 20, F1, 21
Innocent Bystander: 0:0:1 | 11
Josh: 0:0:0 | 22, 25
Misty: 0:1:0 | 15
Pikachu/?????: 1:0:0 | 18, F1
The Popcorn Man: 0:0:0 | 17, F1
Tracey: 1:0:0 | 15
Wood Golems: 1:0:0 | 24
|
|
Recap: With the end of the Tournament finally at hand, a mishap in the arena
caused it, like both previous attempts, to be declared a draw. Garrett and his
newly-reaquired RPing team are sent flying deep into Black Version Territory, where they
meet up with another character of inestimatable importance... Battle #51: Pokebattles Hobby #208 - Skyler
Torture August 8th,
2001
Player: Garrett the Holy
Location: Black Version Portal,
Northern Sector
Gyyyaaarrrrrgggghhhh!
LANCE: Nnnnyyyaaahhhhh!
KOOFA: Aaarrrgghhh!
CHOOKE: ...What they said.
MERCENARY: ...
THARVIAT: ...
POE: (Random slavering/animal noises)
NELANA: Wheeeee!
FROGSTOMP: BONZAI!
HOLYGARY hit GROUND!
LANCE hit HOLYGARY!
RPGTEAM all hit EACH OTHER!
RPGTEAM was renamed BIG PILE!
SIEGARYZ calmly floated down and landed on TOP!
A GREAT PAIN was had by ALL!
...Ouch.
BIG PILE: ...What he said.
Come on, guys... we gotta get up... lying prone usually means
certain death around this place...
SIEGARYZ: Yeah... good thing death isn't fatal around here. ^_^
BIG PILE used UNTANGLE!
...It's not very effective...
...Hey, the Narrator's back!
KOOFA: Nar... rator? That some kind of scorer? Umpire?
NARRATOR is the ULTIMATE BEING!
What NARRATOR says, GOES!
NELANA: ...Hmm... is that so?
NARRATOR nods!
LANCE: With what didst thou nod, omnipresent one? Thou lacks a
body...
NARRATOR nodded with LANCE's HEAD!
LANCE nodded... off to SLEEP!
...Gotta be careful what you say around this thing, guys. Chooke,
wake him up...
CHOOKE used WAKE-UP CALL!
...HOLY CRAP! O_o THAT GIRL HAS A VOICE!
NARRATOR is in GREAT PAIN!
LANCE woke up!
Right... now, let's try that untangling thing again... On the count
of three...
The COUNT of THREE appeared!
COUNT: This is an outrage! Get off me!
COUNT lifted BIG PILE and RAN AWAY!
...Narrator...
BIG PILE used UNTANGLE!
It's STILL not very effective!
SIEGARYZ: I should probably get off, then...
SIEGARYZ leapt off BIG PILE!
...Right, we've got to work this out in order... Who's on the top?
FROGSTOMP: Oi'm on tup, 'ere... But me leg's stuck unda Nel 'ere and
Poe's got 'is claws in me armour!
NELANA: I'm next up, I think... Who's on the bottom?
...I think I am... no, there's someone under me. Who's that?
Uhhh... Wha?
O_o What the?
NARRATOR used EH?
White text? Dun think we've ever had that before...
Uh... who are you people?
What the hell? Oh well... May as well do this the fast way. Is Poe
near the middle?
POE: (Heavy panting/slavering)
CHOOKE: I'd say so...
NELANA: Looks like it to me...
Poe! Roll over!
POE used ROLLOVER!
RANDOM BAKER wandered by, ADMIRING his BEAUTIFUL ROLLS!
...Narrator...
POE used ROLLOVER!
EVERYONE went FLYING!
BIG PILE was renamed RPGTEAM!
...Better... Now, who's this white text dude? Is he one of us?
EVERYONE: Not me...
Uhh... where the hell am I?
...That's a point... Where in hell are we, Narrator?
NARRATOR notes you're in NORTHERN SECTION!
NARRATOR points to the ETERNAL PORTAL just ABOVE YOU!
...Ah, there. Don't think I've ever been HAC territory before...
What the... this is hell?
Some call it that. So... who are you?
But... this can't be hell... there's no flames, no demons, no
screams of eternal torment, no poking, no pools of molten brimstone... what is with this
place?
SIEGARYZ: Oh, he's a new guy... quite an imaginative one too, by the
look of things...
I mean, you'd expect the place to be lit by those flames and pools,
but this entire place is just plain dar...
NEWGUY suddenly looks REALLY REALLY SCARED!
...No... it couldn't be... This isn't Dark Version, is it?
'Fraid so... Why? For the third time, who the hell are you?
Oh gods... I knew he'd have some sort of plan in mind... I don't
believe this...
NARRATOR highly suggests you TELL the NICE PEOPLE who you ARE before
some NOT-SO-NICE PEOPLE (eg, the NARRATOR) beat it out of you!
...I'm Skyler.
O_O
O_O
NELANA: And, that's supposed to mean... what to us?
...This guy's a bloody pokebattles webmaster!
NELANA: Repeat above statement...
Listen... In this universe, the Narrators are a nearly-omnipotent
power. What they say happens, simple as that. But Webmasters are even MORE powerful, they
dictate everything that happens in thier version... The Narrator could kill us with a
word, but we'd come flying straight back through that portal... but the Webmaster could
wipe us from existance, past present and future, with nothing more than a thought!
NELANA: ...Remind me never to get a Webmaster drunk, then... who
knows what they might think of.
Dark Version's generally enemies with everyone, so if a webmaster's
here it might mean a crossover! A war!
...No no no, I'm not here to attack you. I've got nobody here with
me...
Then WHAT is SKYLER doing here?
I don't know... damn damn damn, I should've seen this coming... We
should never have listened to that treacherous bastard Damos...
AIR TEMPERATURE greatly fell!
SUDDEN SILENCE fell over the AREA!
NARRATOR and GARRETT carefully EDGE AWAY from SKYLER!
SIEGARYZ: ...Why?
NARRATOR notes that when the WEBMASTER wipes someone from EXISTANCE,
he often does it rather LOUDLY!
RPGTEAM: ...
RPGTEAM carefully EDGE AWAY from SKYLER!
...Don't worry, he can't hurt me, I'm not his character... besides,
I'm just as powerful as he is.
NARRATOR doesn't think so!
...Oh really?
NARRATOR notes that YOU have but HALF the power of MOONLIGHTVERSION,
which is not NEARLY as POWERFUL as DARK! Not to mention that you're not on your
territory...
I'm screwed, right?
MERCENARY: AU$150.
...HEY!
Ignore her... at least until the Narrator's gone. Anyway, you
shouldn't worry. Nobody can die here, you should know that...
Yeah... but your boss has an army of Team Rocket goons in Moonlight,
Deb's gonna be worried sick... Something really nasty's gonna happen over there, I just
know it...
I suppose we could go talk to the Webmaster, try to convince him to
send you back...
HOLYGARY SHUDDERED at the THOUGHT of TRYING to CONVINCE an ALMIGHTY
BEING something!
NARRATOR thinks there MAY BE some BETTER ideas!
Hmm? Any suggestions, Narrator?
NARRATOR thinks SUGGESTION #1 would be to RUN!
...Huh?
NARRATOR points HELPFULLY at the THOUSANDS of HACs, KILLED during
the TOURNAMENT, that are FLYING from the DARK PORTAL!
...I think we do what he says.
HOLYGARY&TEAM use NOD, PAUSE, RUUUUNNN!!!
HOLYGARY&TEAM ran away!
SKYLER ran away!
HACs POINT and GIVE CHASE!
Location: 10 METRES SOUTH of BLACK PORTAL
...10 metres? We travelled 10 metres?
NO! This LOCATION was NAMED in some FORIEGN LANGUAGE!
The TRUE name is TYENMAETURSOGHFFOVB'LARKPJORTURL!
...But that just DOESN'T LOOK GOOD!
...Right. So exactly where are we?
HOLYGARY&TEAM and SKYLER are approximately 11 METRES SOUTH of
BLACK PORTAL!
I thought it would be something like that. Any reason we're here and
not somewhat further south, you know, somewhere where those HACs behind us can't shoot us?
HACs BEHIND YOU can't shoot you!
Really? Is this a completely different location?
NO! HACs don't FIRE because they might hit the HACs and HAMMY
standing in FRONT of YOU!
...Skyler... you say you're a webmaster... now might be a good time
to use some of those uber-powerful webmaster skillz...
Uh... right... Moonlight Strike!
TEMPERATURE dropped!
NARRATOR respectfully informs SKYLER that any attack using the word
STRIKE is PUNISHABLE by HOKACT!
This is your FIRST, LAST and ONLY WARNING!
HACs used SURROUND!
HACs set up a SURROUND SOUND SYSTEM!
Wind blade, then!
SKYLER used WIND BLADE!
SKYLER started WINDING UP a little KEY on a BLADE!
Wind, wind, wind, wind... whee...
...Enjoying yourself there?
HACs used UTLIMATUM!
HACs: UM...
UM was AMPLIFIED through SURROUNDSOUNDSYSTEM!
VOLUME greatly rose!
NERVES were greatly GRATED!
...Ow...
NARRATOR used GRATED NERVES on his PIZZA!
You think that's an annoying sound? Chooke... give the nice clowns a
high note!
CHOOKE pulled out SHEET MUSIC!
NARRATOR looks!
...SHEET MUSIC contains ONE LINE per PAGE!
HALF the PAGE is taken up by the LINES between STAVE and NOTE!
The REST of the PAGE is taken up by the MULTIPLE 8va SYMBOLS, noting
that everything is to be played AN OCTAVE HIGHER... PER SYMBOL!
...NARRATOR is NOT letting her SING THAT until he gets some of those
EARPLUGS!
CHOOKE: ...Um, I suppose I've got a couple spare pairs here, hold
on...
CHOOKE gave NARRATOR some EARPLUGS!
NARRATOR equipped EARPLUGS!
LANCE: On what? Thou hast no ears!
...NARRATOR realises a small FLAW in his PLAN!
NARRATOR used EARGROW!
NARRATOR is now an OMNIPRESENT OMNIPOTENT FLOATING PAIR OF EARS!
NARRATOR equipped EARPLUGS!
It's super effective!
NARRATOR is IMMUNE to CHOOKE!
CHOOKE: Here, Skyler, you should probably have a pair too...
From what I can see, I'd have to agree with that...
SKYLER equipped EARPLUGS!
Right, Chooke! Go for it!
CHOOKE: Right! Ready...
CHOOKE used FALL OVER GROANING!
...I'm fairly sure that wasn't what was intended.
NARRATOR notes that the various HACS around decided use WARNING
SHOT!
Isn't the idea of a warning shot to warn, not kill?
NARRATOR notes that that was a WARNING SHOT, compared to THAT!
THAT was renamed THE BIG GUNS!
...The big guns?
NARRATOR nods!
They DESERVE their NAME!
...I have a feeling we should run now.
NARRATOR points out that you're SURROUNDED!
...Don't suppose you'd be willing to help us?
NARRATOR... MIGHT be able to do SOMETHING along those lines...
What's in it for you?
NARRATOR asks if you want ASSISTANCE! YES or NO!
Erm... The Narrator's assistance usually has some sort of catch...
What do you say, team?
HACs used LEVEL BIG GUNS!
It's super intimidating!
SIEGARYZ: Somehow I feel that, overall, it's going to be easier if
we say yes.
RPGTEAM: Uh-huh.
Same here...
Okay, Narrator... what did you have in mind?
ORCISH ARMIES appeared!
BATTLE occured!
HAMMY: It's the greenskin infidels! Attack! ATTACK!
HACS used GUNFIRE!
HAC's GUNS set on FIRE!
HACs CURSE and DROP THEM!
ORCS used CHARGE!
ORCS CHARGEd HACs with UNLAWFUL USE of FIREARMS!
ORCS obtained LARGE QUANTITIES of GOLD in FINES!
HAMMY: Unlawful use? What is this? There is no law here!
It's the NARRATOR's LAW!
HAMMY: WHAT?! Grr... My servants, you have other guns! Use them!
OTHER GUNS are ALSO ON FIRE!
SO are HACS!
ORCS used CHARGE!
ORCS CHARGED HACs for FURTHER UNLAWFUL USE OF FIREARMS!
ORCS CONFISCATED FIREARMS!
HAMMY: This is not fair! You are siding with the Orcs! It's in the
Narrator's rulebook that...
Mwahahaha... I now reveal my true form!
HAMMY: You mean you're not normally a pair of floating, plugged
ears?
NARRATOR was renamed NARRATORC!
HAMMY: ...
NARRATORC works for the ORCS now!
HAMMY: You know, I'm more powerful than you. I'm a Doompuff Clone.
NARRATORC laughs!
NARRATORC used STASIS FREEZE!
HAMMY was FROZEN in TIME in a STASIS BUBBLE!
ORCS used SWARM!
HACS were CAPTURED AND/OR KILLED!
NARRATOR laughs EVILLY!
Now... for those annoying heroes...
...
...
HEY! HEROES must have GOT AWAY!
ORCS! ATTACK!
ORCS used CHASE!
ORCS ran away!
NARRATOR ran away!
...Ah, Narrative theory r r0xx0rz.
Now, quickly, we've got places to be.
We do? Where?
Anywhere but here sounds good to me. Let's go!
Come
on... I know you're so happy to be out of that tournament that even if you didn't like
this battle (and I know you did) you'd give me a good review. Please? |
|
|
Recap: A
recently deceased Liquid Version character has ended up among the near-endless population
of Dark Version, and is being followed by the Ex-Rocket Liquid Narrator who just wants to
see how his old home's doing... unfortunately for them, however, both Garrett's RPG team
(and Skyler) and the Dark Narrator turned evil(er) are nearby, and the Narratorc doesn't
think much of Narrative competition...
Battle #52: Argh, the COLOURZ! X.x Pain. August 22nd, 2001
Player: Hippy
Location: Near Black Version
Portal, Northern Sector
Wow... this place is really tripped out... Look at the sky,
man...
NARRATOR wonders what's so great about a DARK FORBODING
MARONE-COLOURED SKY!
...Nothing. That's the point. It sucks.
...Wow, DARKWEBMASTER is REALLY NOT VERY GOOD at writing HIPPY!
Oh, so now the boss of this place is writing it?
NARRATOR nods!
...NARRATOR is struck by a FEELING of NOSTALGIA!
Huh?
NARRATOR is HOME!
...That's right, you're James, aren't you? The ex-Team Rocket
dude...
NARRATOR hasn't seen this place in AGES!
...But NARRATOR is sure it HASN'T CHANGED a BIT!
NARRATOR zooms out slightly!
NARRATOR sees HACs frantically fighting against ORCS, and MASS CHAOS
everywhere!
Nup! Exactly how I left it. ^_^ *sigh*
...So why are you here? Shouldn't we be under the Dark Narrator's
power now?
NARRATOR just wanted to see how the OLD PLACE was GOING!
DARKNARRATOR appears to be BUSY at the moment!
...Uh-huh. Oh well, better the devil you know...
NARRATOR freezes!
...Literally?
No. Sorry.
Damn... Reason?
NARRATOR has spotted SOMETHING APPROACHING!
Oh man... this is gonna lead to a fight, I just know it...
APPROACHING SOMETHING is of a TYPE that is RARELY SEEN in DARK
VERSION, and is regarded as one of the most DEADLY and PEACE-DESTROYING PESTS the VERSION
has ever KNOWN!
Man, Dark Webmaster dude's writing style is hard to understand.
YOU shut UP!
APPROACHING SOMETHING was renamed... *shudder* ...GOOD GUYS!
GOODGUYS were identified as HOLYGARY, RPGTEAM and SKYLER!
Look out! It's the Narrator! Run away!
Ah... Looks like the Narrators here haven't changed much either.
GOODGUYS used RUNAWAY!
RUNAWAY failed!
HOLYGARY: Damn... Alright, ready for battle, peoples... We probably
won't get out of this one alive...
Hey, mellow out... The Narrator's not that bad a guy...
NARRATOR wonders why HOLYGARY&CO are so AFRAID!
HOLYGARY: ...Huh?
RPGTEAM: ...*various statements of exclaimation and confusion, plus
panting from Poe*
...Alright, that's not your Narrator.
NARRATOR is from LIQUID VERSION!
HOLYGARY: Hey, a new guy. I think we're just about ready for a
replacement... How'd you end up here?
NARRATOR is just VISITING his old HOME!
NARRATOR is an EX-ROCKET!
HOLYGARY: ...Now that you mention it, if you take out the
omnipresent quality, you sound a lot like a guy called James that hung around with me
once...
NARRATOR is a JAMES CLONE!
HOLYGARY: Yeah, that'd probably explain it. Right... don't suppose
we could convince you to help us?
NARRATOR seems to remember that NARRATION RULE #1 is NEVER TO
DIRECTLY ASSIST UNDERLINGS!
Right. We'll be going now, then.
HOLYGARY&CO used RUNAWAY!
RUNAWAY failed!
...Oi, if you're not gonna help us, let us keep going.
NARRATOR didn't SAY that!
HOLYGARY: Crap, it's the other guy! Run for it!
NARRATORC notes that it didn't work last time, so he isn't going to
even BOTHER!
WHAT is THIS?
WHO are YOU?
NARRATORC used OI!
It's super effective!
NARRATOR flinched!
HEY! Unprovoked attack! NARRATOR used ROCKET PUNCH!
NARRATOR threw a ROCK et the PUNCH!
...Which one of you said that?
...I dunno.
...Me neither.
NARRATORC has found the RUNAWAY HEROES!
ORCISH HORDES appeared!
...Whee, look at all this money they've horded away! All for us!
NARRATORC is BEYOND your little NARRATIVE THEORY GAMES!
HOLYGARY: That's nice. Any of you got a sack of some sort? We need
to be able to carry a lot of this.
NELANA: Koofa's got heaps of bags of sports stuff. Use one of them.
KOOFA: Hey, you can't use my bags! I need my equipment!
NARRATORC commands you to STOP THIS NONSENSE!
Exactly, Koofa, that's nonsense. Just imagine how much equipment you
could buy with all this cash!
KOOFA: ...K. Three bags.
HOLYGARY: Good work, Skyler. You learn quickly.
RPGTEAM start heaping ORCISH HORDES into SACKS!
NARRATORC doesn't REMEMBER asking for your opinion, IMPOSTER!
ORCISH HORDES used SWORDS!
BAGS were cut OPEN!
Ooh, ornamental swords, too. I'll be taking a couple of them.
NARRATORC screams in FRUSTRATION!
NELANA: Whee... How about screaming in Castr-
HOLYGARY: Shh! We've already narrowly avoided a Mature Content
Warning once... careful what you say.
NELANA: Aww... ruin all my fun.
RPGTEAM finished filling BAGS with GOLD!
Right... got as much as we can carry? We'll be taking our leave,
now...
HOLYGARY&CO took LEAVES!
BAGS were filled with LEAVES!
HOLYGARY: Nope. Still treasure, sorry.
NARRATORC thinks that they're LEAVES!
NARRATOR says it's TREASURE!
NARRATORC has had enough of this DOUBLE NARRATION THING!
NARRATOR used NYAH!
NARRATORS used SCUFFLE!
L was SCUFFED by SCHOOL SHOES!
...What?
DARKWEBMASTER's SCHOOL is FULL of SCUFF MARKS on WALLS from SCHOOL
SHOES!
SCHOOL SHOES used BIG KICK!
SHOES get a BIG KICK out of SCHOOL!
RANDOM SCHOOL of FISH was KICKED AROUND!
FROGSTOMP: BONZAI! I'll getcha, liddle fiszhis...
This isn't getting you anywhere, Narrators!
HOLYGARY: Yeah... I dunno which one's talking anymore.
NARRATORC used SOLUTION!
NARRATOR was given LIQUID TEXT!
...Hey, you can'tdoooo..._____
HOLYGARY: What did you do to him?
_____________________
NARRATORC used EVILLAUGH!
NARRATORC feels it's hardly HIS FAULT if LIQUID TEXT is NOT SOLID
ENOUGH to STAY UP!
_________________
Aha, VICTORY! NOW, let's have a look at those ORCISH HORDES!
ORCISH HORDES appeared!
...No they didn't, they were already here. And we've got quite a lot
of them in these sacks.
LOTS OF ORCS appeared!
NARRATORC used OI, THEY'VE GOT OUR GOLD!
...Somehow, I feel that we shouldn't be holding onto this stuff
anymore.
HOLYGARY: No! Run with the gold!
RPGTEAM used RUNWITHTHEGOLD!
GOLD failed to RUN!
RPGTEAM, therefore, ALSO failed to RUN!
_____________________
You shut up. Your arguments aren't solid enough to be considered.
>;P
Damn... how're we supposed to get out of this one?
ORCS used ADVANCE!
Uh-oh...
ORCS were placed in ADVANCED MATHEMATICS CLASSES!
ORCS were EXTREMELY CONFUSED!
ANOTHER ONE?!
You bet, Narrator. Took me a while to get out of that blasted mine
shaft, but...
_______
NARRATOR was given ICE TEXT!
Gah... Thanks, whoever you are.
HOLYGARY: Wow... for a version that's never had more than three
different colours in one battle before, this is ridiculous. O_o Don't suppose I could ask
for...
NARRATORC growled!
HOLYGARY: ...Didn't think so.
NARRATORS used SPITE!
NARRATORS gave HOLYGARY SILVERTEXT!
Ooh... purdy shiny silver tournament text...
Gah... Too... many... colours... X.x
NARRATORC sent out ORC CLAN!
Right, guys... I think we've got two Narrators on our side here,
so... You all know what to do.
RPGTEAM nodded!
RPGTEAM ran away!
RUNAWAY failed!
RUNAWAY succeeded!
RUNAWAY succeeded!
...2/3 of RPGTEAM ran away!
Only HOLYGARY, NELANA, CHOOKE and SKYLER remain!
NELANA: We'll never get away while that Narrator's here! We've got
to fight!
You're right... Chooke! Nice high note?
CHOOKE used HIGH NOTE!
Random NOTE was thrown HIGH in the AIR!
...Narrators?
ORC CLAN randomly suffer from INCREDIBLE FEAR, EXTREME PAIN,
COMPLETE FAINT or SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION of HEADS!
ORC CLAN ran away, screamed, fainted or stumbled around blindly!
NARRATORC is UNAFFECTED!
Damn, we gave him those earplugs!
If we can take those earplugs off him, then we can beat him! Come on, guys!
NARRATOR used EARPLUGSTEAL!
...The attack failed!
PUN used EARPLUGSTEAL!
...The attack failed!
...Sorry, guys, we can't do it... you'll have to try.
Right. Everyone, go for the earplugs!
NARRATORC used MEDIA COVERAGE!
NELANA: ...And that's supposed to do what?
LARGE QUANTITIES of EXPENSIVE CAMERA and LIGHTING EQUIPMENT fell on
RPGTEAM!
OW!
Great pain. Help.
Don't worry, I've got it!
...WHAT?!
Hah! HIPPY used EARPLUGSTEAL!
The attack succeeded!
You! I'd forgotten you were here!
SO had READERS!
SO had DARKWEBMASTER! ^_^
Now, girl, attack!
CHOOK used HIGH NOTE!
With an omnipresent shreik of pain, the
Narratorc's form - composing in itself solely of sound - was shredded and blown away by
the force of the incredible note unleashed by Chooke - a note so high that it couldn't
really be heard, but was felt in the incredible vibrations it produced. The very air
itself shattered as the concentrated power of this vibration struck home... and while the
Narratorc was blown apart under its power, the unfortunate form of Hippy was also directly
in its path.
The unfortunate Liquid Version character didn't
even have time for a shreik of pain - and even if he had, nobody would've heard it over
that - before his body was literally shaken apart under the intense vibrations. The bonds
holding cells together and to each other fell out, reducing the Hippy to a rather
disgusting pile of smelly goo...
Whaddya think you are, some sort of Story Mode Narrator? The
Narratorc was only chased away by that sound. We've got to find some way of stopping him,
preferably more permanent!
I've got just the girl for the job. Get the others over here.
RPGTEAM appeared!
Right... now, this is what we've got to do...
SKYLER vanished!
...
RPGTEAM: What he didn't say.
NARRATOR thinks he should get back to LIQUID VERSION!
NARRATOR used TIME JUMP!
NARRATOR returned to LIQUID VERSION a COUPLE OF DAYS AGO, when he
was needed for a LIQUID BATTLE! O_o
PUN ended BATTLE!
Hey, what do you mean? I need to...
PUN lets you get on with your PLAN without INTERFERENCE!
PUN has a JOB to do with SKYLER!
If
you're not too badly blinded by the colours, drop through this link and give us some
feedback! |
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Battle #53: Moonlit Memories. September 23rd, 2001
Player: Skyler
Location: Moonlight Version, exact
location unknown
SKYLER appeared!
...Okay, mysteriously vanish, reappear in a new place a month and a
day later for no apparent... hey, it's Moonlight!
SKYLER is CORRECT!
DAMOS decided to be SLIGHTLY MERCIFUL and show you how your old HOME
is doing WITHOUT YOU!
Cool!
...
...
...
...And?
MOONLIGHT VERSION appears to be BLOODY BORING!
NOTHING used HAPPEN!
It's super effective!
READER's INTEREST greatly fell!
...Right. So nothing has happened since I vanished.
PUN looked through ARCHIVES!
PUN found SOMETHING HAPPENING!
PUN pulled TAPE out of ARCHIVES!
MOONLIGHT #24 APPEARED!
Yay. A battle. ^_^ Lessee what Deb's been up to...
PUN rapidly scanned through BATTLE!
PUN used FACEFAULT!
(FACE of RANDOM PLANET was SPLIT by a huge FAULTLINE,
blah, blah...)
SKYLER probably ISN'T GOING TO LIKE THIS!
Shuddup and let me see...
PUN put ML#24 into VCR
PUN pressed PLAY!
...It didn't affect enemy ML#24!
...Enemy?
Believe me, boy, by the time this battle's finished, you'll be ruing
its very existance.
PUN grumbled!
PUN used FIDDLE!
RANDOM WIRING COMBONATION #2 appeared in VCR!
RWC#2 failed!
PUN growled and used TRIAL&ERRORx298!
RWCs#3-300 failed!
Umm...
SKYLER held up EXTENSION CORD!
Tried plugging it in?
PUN used GAH!
PUN plugged PLUG into POWER OUTLET!
...What power outlet?
POWER OUTLET appeared!
Works for me.
PUN used PLAY!
...It didn't affect enemy ML#24!
PUN growled and used TRIAL&ERRORx300!
RWCs#1-300 failed!
PUN used SCREAM of FRUSTRATION!
5000-PAGEMANUAL appeared!
Come on, it's just a simple VCR! It can't need a manual that
thick...
Oh, MANUAL isn't about VCR!
MANUAL fell on VCR!
VCR was WEAKENED!
PUN used POKEBALL!
PUN caught VCR!
Give nickname to VCR?
Yes.
VCR was named STUPIDIMPOSSIBLEPIECEOFSH-
For the sake of the ratings of both versions, Pun-d00d...
*sigh*
VCR was named VCR!
Now... Work!
VCR used WORK!
It... WORKED!
Wow. Now that's how you program a VCR.
Eh-hem.
PUN, for the LAST BLOODY TIME, pressed PLAY!
It didn't affect ene-
PUN hefted 5000-page manual!
It's super effective!
Enemy ML#24 used PLAYBACK!
It took you 55 lines to get a VCR to operate.
Shuddup. Even Narrators have trouble with some things, y'know.
Now playing: Moonlight Battle #24 - colours red, aqua and white
reserved for ML Narrator and Webmasters...
...Zzz...zzz..zz.z.z.z.z.z.zz....what the...text? Here?..CRAP. THE
WEBBIES ARE BACK!
Nah..it's just one, remember? Narrator..you and your frickin one
line too late..
Oh good... At least Deb is still concerned...
Don't stop listening...
Deb? ..you're still mourning? o.o
..? What? Oh! That's just acting. Moron.
...!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -_-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
PUN warned you.
You know, Skyler would hurt something if he heard you say that.
NO BLOODY KIDDING! I'm gonna kill you, you little...
PUN reminds you that this is nothing but a VIDEORECORDING!
I DON'T CARE! DIEEEE!
SKYLER ran into a TV SCREEN!
...Oi... This is a bloody 3-D projection! There is no screen!
PUN shrugged!
This is POKEBATTLES!
It's not SUPPOSED to make SENSE!
Oww.
Back to the show...
I'm bored...let's have some fun. WEBMASTER CREATION!
DEB used WEBMASTER CREATION!
DEB created JOHN CLEESE..? Why?
Hey, she does have some taste after all.
PUN fastforwards a bit, while keeping MANUAL hanging above VCR at
ALL TIMES!
Hi. Until Skyler gets back, you can have the white text.
..Texts? Large booming voices? Skyler? Where the hell am I?
Oi, that's my text. >< Get off it!
You've got purdy royal blue text. Don't complain.
OPENING STANDARD CHARACTER INTRO.EXE
ERROR?..The operation completed..succesfully? Feh, that's Microsoft
for you....THIS PROGRAM HAS PERFORMED AN ILLEGAL OPERATION AND WILL BE SHUT DOWN.
...again, there's Microsoft for you..
PUN attempted to copy-paste MOONLIGHT HUMOUR to brighten DARK
VERSION a bit!
...Gah, bad unintentional pun. Evil.
Where the hell am I?
Sorry, our Info computer has to reboot now; just sit tight.
...well, I blow my nose at you, you daughter of a silly person.
Hey, my parents aren't silly. ...in fact, they're uptight losers.
But all parents are. They complain about my obsession with tiny kids with magic powers in
pointy hats..when will they learn? WHEN WILL THEY LEARN?
I wanna go home..
..Hn. You two stay here, I have some buisness I need to take care
of..
DEB disappeared. Hn...Sooo...
Bleah, I don't want to read about how some Python guy is getting my
position... You can stop it now.
SKYLER is RIGHT!
It's for the BEST that SKYLER doesn't see the END of ML#24!
PUN used STO-
...Hang on. Why is it for the best?
Uh... nevermind...
Show.
Uh...
Show. Show now.
PUN let TAPE keep running!
Wanna see what she's doing?
Why not?
NARRATOR and JOHNCLEESE follow DEB!
NARRATOR and JOHNCLEESE appear at the Castle ..Polio?
..Uhh..why does this seems so familiar? Same look, same feel to the
castle...but..instead of hot teenagers...it's...little pointy-hat thingies..
Oh no..Those are VIVIs...good GOD!
Oh, that. That's nothing... I've known about that for ages...
...And you let it continue?
It's suprisingly good viewing material.
SKYLER points to VARIOUS CONCEALED SECURITY CAMERAS!
PUN used O_O!
PUN didn't realise SKYLER was such a-
Just kidding.
Phew.
Yeah... is that all?
I guess...
PUN used STOP!
PUN took ML#24!
PUN thought for a moment, then dropped MANUAL!
VCR died!
Good call. Should we be getting back now? This place is depressing
all of a sudden...
PUN supposes so...
DARK PORTAL appeared!
Let's go...
SKYLER walked through DARK POR- hang on a minute...
What is it?
PUN wonders what those SECURITY CAMERAS are FOR, then?
Uh... bye!
SKYLER leapt through PORTAL!
PUN followed!
Location: ROTVGV territory, East-North-Eastern Dark
Version
Player: Chooke
NAR-
*sings*
Good shot, Chooke.
No problem. ^_^
Wonder when Skyler's gonna get back? We've been walking for a month
or so now...
What is it exactly we're...
NARRA-
*sings* ...eh-hem, what is it exactly we're looking for?
There's someone here who can deal with Narrators... If we can find
her, then...
MOONLIGHT PORTAL appeared!
*sin-
Don't worry, that's the other guy. Looks like he and Skyler have
finally decided to come back...
Oh... k. ^_^
NEW SHADOW PORTAL appeared!
Okay... what's with that?
SKYLER stepped from MOONLIGHT PORTAL!
SOMETHING appears to be EMERGING from NSPORTAL!
PUN decided to end the battle in SUSPENSE!
Aww... come on...
PUN notes that YOU will be able to make GREAT PROGRESS with your
SEARCH while UNINTERRUPTED by NARRATORS!
...Eh. Okay.
No
Webmasters were hurt during the creation of this battle. Some might be, however, if they
decide not to comment on it... |
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Battle #54: Rage Against the Narratorc! September 27th, 2001
Player: Garrett the Holy
Location: ROTVGV Territory, Eastern
Dark Version
FIVE!
FOUR!
THREE!
TWO!
NARR-
CHOOKE: *sings*
Eh-hem... thank you...
ONE!
And, we're on air once again for another exciting episode of Dark
Version... Last time, Skyler, the Moonlight Version Webmaster stranded in Dark Version,
got to visit his old Version for a battle and found out that his co-webmistress never
really cared about him leaving and has recently brought up a new webmaster to take his
place...
Do we really have to go through this? It's painful enough as it is,
okay?
PUN glared at SKYLER!
...Garrett and his team, plagued by the warped and biased Narratorc,
seek the assistance of a powerful force living in the Video Game Villians territory.
Continually fending off the endless attacks of Narratorc...
...Hmm?
That's his cue... Narrative laws of the universe demand that he show
up when I say something like that.
...
...
...Oh well, let's keep going, then... While the group seeks the
assistance of this force, the orcish armies clash with magic and blades against the HAC's
heavy weaponry. This could have some serious repercussions to the power flow of Dark
Version, but it's unlikely, seeing as everyone who dies gets thrown out of the portal
again. While power is on the side of the HACs, the Narratorc is allied with their enemies
and any Orcish dead will be sent directly to their own fortress, meaning that they must
spread their forces liberally between-
Oi, Green Narrator!
Hmm?
RPGTEAM are aiming VARIOUS HIGH-POWER WEAPONS and SPELLS at PUN!
I think we've had enough now. On with the show. Okay?
Uh... Right. Enough recapping.
NARRATORC app-
CHOOKE: *sings*
Hmm, that one was close.
Right. Let's get searching.
NELANA: What is it exactly we're looking for, here?
Uh... I don't know exactly what she looks like...
Well, even if you did, it wouldn't exactly help us. We are sorta
living in a text-based universe...
PUN wonders if it's HER!
Hmm? What's her name?
HER!
...Oh. One of those.
HER used ooooh!
HER used OGRAB!
...What? What are you doing, you little pest?
HER is trying to grab the O out of HOLYGARY!
HER wants to be a HERO!
Bleah! Die!
HOLYGARY used DIE!
GIANT NOVELTY FUZZY DIE fell on HER!
HER tried to grab the O out of NOVELTY!
...Right. I think we should leave.
Green Narrator, dun suppose you could make her appear or something?
HER appe-
It wasn't funny the first time.
PUN is TRYING, okay?
Who is it you want to make APPEAR?
NARRATORC appeared!
One... Saiyan Devil Girl?
NARRATORC flees in TERROR at that NAME!
...Ooh. She must be good. ^_^
PUN is SHOCKED!
PUN thinks you MUST BE KIDDING!
PUN will NOT cause HER to APPEAR!
Aww, come on... it'll mean she'll get rid of the Narratorc...
PUN notes that it will ALSO cause her to get rid of PUN!
...Eh. We'll fend her off for ya.
PUN also notes that you CANNOT make SDG appear!
SDG is IMMUNE to NARRATIVE ORDERS!
Damn... are you sure?
PUN is QUITE SURE!
SDG appeared!
I thought you said you couldn't summon her!
No! PUN was not SUMMONING! PUN was just noting that SDG had turned
up!
SDG: Hmm... A Narrator. Interesting.
PUN will be LEAVING NOW!
SDG: I don't think so.
PUN... was... stopped... DAMN! Please... spare me...
SDG: ...Mind giving me a colour here? This red makes me feel too
close to one of you...
PUN hurriedly gave SDG YELLOWTEXT!
Ah, much better. Now, to remove you...
Wait... we came to seek your help... we want you to kill a
Narrator...
What does it look like I'm about to do?
That's not a Narrator. The real Narrator's been possessed and is out
to control the version, killing all good guys... we need your help. None of us can defeat
him.
PUN escaped while SDG was DISTRACTED!
Bai!
Damn, it got away. I suppose I'll listen... you want me to kill the
Narrator, you say...
Yeah, he's pulling the Orcish forces together... they're attacking
the HACs now, and they'll be here soon if he's not stopped.
I suppose I'll help... after all, that's my whole goal here, to
destroy pokebattles...
RPGTEAM: GASP-ness!
Are you sure you want to work with such a creature, Garrett?
We don't have any choice...
NARRATORC appeared!
CHOOKE: *s-
Wait... we want to destroy it... we don't run anymore...
Well, Narrator... we meet again...
GAH! They found you!
NARRATORC ra-
Scatter shot!
NARRATORC is... surrounded by energy attacks... can't escape...
SDG died!
You know your little Narrative tricks can't hurt me, fool.
SDG ran away!
Oh no. Nuh-uh.
SCATTER SHOT shot back at SDG!
It's not going anywhere.
NARRATORC used PANIC!
NARRATORC used EVERY NARRATIVE TRICK IN THE BOOK!
I don't see any book in there with you.
DON'T USE MY NARRATIVE THEORY AGAINST ME!
Okay, I suppose I'll just use my own attacks... Final Flash!
NARRATORC used DESPERATE MEASURES!
NARRATORC sent out HOLYGARY!
...Hey! Stop that! You can't...
HOLYGARY used SHINY MAGIC SHIELD!
FINAL FLASH was DISAPPATED!
Guys... help me! I can't...
Hmm... I may've underestimated you slightly, Narrator... I guess
I'll just have to kill this one before I get to you...
Gah! No, you can't do tha-
You're a pokebattles main character, Garrett. You're the best-known
figure in this version. You represent pokebattles nearly as much as the Narrator. You will
die too.
;_; Well, this worked.
HOLYGARY used HOLY TWISTER!
Hah... Deflection strike!
I don't know who to go for here...
HUNDREDS of BLADES spun towards SDG!
SDG hit them all BACK!
HOLYGARY was fully MINCEMEATED!
HOLYGARY fainted!
SDG took... no damage? ARRGGHH! WHY?!
Umm... let's see, because I'm stronger than you?
NARRATOR will find a WAY to DEFEAT YOU SOMEDAY, EVIL ONE!
Yes, very nice. For now, I think I'll defeat you. Combo strike!
NARRATOR sent out NELANA!
Player: Nelana
NELANA used OMNISLASH!
FORCES collided!
NEITHER SIDE took DAMAGE!
Ah, a worthy opponent, perhaps?
Narrator, didn't you say something about anyone who ever ordered an
attack with the word 'Slash' in it would be severely punished!
NARRATIVE THEORY was used against SELF!
NARRATORC's HEALTH greatly fell!
NARRATORC is NOT ENJOYING THIS, THANKS!
NELANA used SHIMMERING BLADES!
EIGHT ETHERAL SWORDS appeared!
SDG was forced to DEFEND HERSELF DESPERATELY!
You think a few little glowing transparent blades are going to
hurt... ow! What the hell? This can't be right...
NARRATOR grins!
SDG recieved SEVERAL NASTY WOUNDS!
Gah... Power Aura!
SDG created a PROTECTIVE AURA!
ETHERAL SWORDS used DARK FLARE PULSE!
SPECIAL EFFECTS ensued!
BARRIER was fully SHATTERED!
NELANA used METEOR COMBO!
Hit 5 times!
NELANA's attack continued!
It's incredibly painful!
No... this... this can't be... Defeated by a... Narrator...
Not yet, you're not!
You too? What do you think you can do?
PUN opened NEW SHADOW PORTAL!
That thing! I'd forgotten about it... what does it do?
NSPORTAL sent out SEAL!
SEAL hit NARRATORC, full on!
What... what is this?
SEAL used REACT!
SEAL attached to NARRATORC!
NARRATOR's POWERS are fully SEALED!
WHAT? SEAlED? YOu cannot sEAl my
powErs! I am invincible!
You seem to be having a little trouble with the caps there, mate...
What have you done to me? I... I cannot
be defeated by this!
His colour's draining! Kill him quickly!
Aha... Now, my turn...
NELANA used HUNGRY FRIEND!
DAMAGE DONE is comparable to the MESSAGE BOARDER incident during the
TOURNAMENT!
You... will never... defeat... me...
never...
SDG used FLICK!
NARRATORC died!
HOLYGARY was fully HEALED!
...We just killed a Narrator...
Now THAT's a feeling.
RPGTEAM: Yay.
I've always wanted to do that.
Hmm, good work, you lot... I've been wanting to take that guy down
for some time... I guess I'll let you live, for now.
What, just because you're half ripped to shreds and rendered
virtually incapable of offense or defence by my attack before, you're not willing to face
us?
SDG used INSTATRANS!
SDG is simply GONE!
Chicken.
RANDOM PROP thrown by SDG from SOME WAY AWAY appeared!
RANDOM PROP bounced off NELANA's HEAD!
Why that little... I'm gonna-
Good day's work all! But we're not done... No rest for the wicked!
Let's move!
Wicked? ...Aren't we the good guys?
Shutupshutupshutup...
The
Narrator may be gone now... but I'm not, and I still like some feedback time to time.
*smiles integratingly* *gets hit by a flying leg of ham* |
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Battle
#55: Along the WIND-ing path to... I dunno. O_o October 2nd, 2001
Player: Skyler
Location: ROTVGV territory, Eastern
Dark Version
Mwahaha... the plan is going ahead perfectly... Now I have
the-
What are you muttering about?
Uh... Gah! We're on air again! I wasn't expecting another battle for
at least a week!
Hmm... strange... The big guy seems to be trying to actually get
through battles... quickly?
Bah, guilt row. What's going on, then?
Uh... You picked a bad time. The rest of 'em are all asleep. O_o
Look:
<Holygary[zz]> Yah... die, foul beast...
<Nelana-sleep> None shall pass...
<Chooke|zzz> Even when I'm sleeeeepiingg... zzzz
Hmm... They're dreaming?
* Siegaryzzz does not dream... Not while sleeping, anyway. O_o
Why is that in red?
Webbie uses the applet, I suppose. Freaky thing. Don't mind Siega,
he tends to keep an eye out even when sleeping.
Hmm?
Look, there it is there.
EYE appeared!
EYE was renamed EYE of KILROGG!
Shh! You're gonna wake them up!
PUN looked at EYE!
...That's an orc spell. O_o Are you sure that's Siega's?
No, it's Kilrogg's. O_o Siega just happened to relieve him of it
some time ago. Guy thought he could show up Siega at dark magic, apparently... well, he
was wrong, I can tell you that now.
PUN decides he'd rather not know!
Shhh! They're all asleep!
Why aren't you, then?
Time zone difference. O_o Anyway, I'm used to there being a moon. Or
at least moonlight. Don't think we ever specified if there was a moon to actually create
it... All this place has got is that freaky burnt onion. O_o
...
...
...
Well, this is interesting.
It's a battle! They should be up! We're losing readers here!
RPGTEAM woke up!
...It had no effect on RPGTEAM?
PUN growls!
Is EVERYONE developing immunity to NARRATIVE POWER?
...No, I think they're just really tired.
Oh? Why is that?
...I don't think they've ever slept here before. O_o
What has that got to do with... what, you mean here as in Dark
Version?
Uh... yeah... according to Narrative theory, nothing actually
happens unless there's a battle that says it does, right? The old Narrator never gave 'em
a chance...
PUN looks SHOCKED!
No you don't... for one thing, I can't actually see you, so there's
no way you could look like you'd been hit by an electric... gah, acting OOC, will shut up
now.
PUN looks BORED!
Hmm... Don't suppose we could drop in on Moonlight again?
PUN says NOPE!
PUN is under SPECIFIC INSTRUCTIONS to NOT let SKYLER go to ANY OTHER
EXISTING VERSION!
Damn...
SKYLER must find SOMETHING TO DO HERE!
...There is nothing to do here! They're all asleep, and I can't
exactly go off without 'em! I don't know anything about this place! And besides, I dun
think Damos would like that much.
PUN notes that a BATTLE is REQUIRED!
PUN supposes you could PROTECT RPGTEAM from HORDES of NASTIES!
Uh... no, I don't think.
READERS are getting BORED!
BORED READERS equals POOR RATINGS!
POOR RATINGS means ANGRY WEBMASTER!
ANGRY WEBMASTERS need STRESS RELIEF!
And NOTHING makes better STRESS RELIEF than SKYLER TORTURE!
(Mwahaha)
Uh...
And there's something even WORSE than THAT!
Your NARRATOR is BORED!
Gah! Uh... Bored Narrator... time to be elsewhere.
SKYLER completely failed to RUN AWAY!
Damn. Uh...
PUN tries to work out what should APPEAR!
Hey, wait... I've got a better idea! Why don't we make a... new
version?
PUN OooooOOOoooohs!
PUN thinks THAT would keep READERS occupied until NEXT BATTLE!
Yeah... Not being webmaster of someplace is starting to get to me...
>< I think I'm starting to lose my powers.
PUN wonders what version should be created!
...Suppose I could redo the original... Wind version hasn't seen an
update for a while...
PUN notes that you MAY NOT GO to an EXISTING VERSION!
Okay, okay, we'll make a new wind version. O_o Geez...
PUN wants to know HOW WE DO IT!
PUN is all EXCITED-LIKE!
Okay... just say "Wind Version appeared!"
Wind Version appeared!
...No, all Narrator-like. You know.
Oh... WIND VERSION appeared!
Vwee.
WIND VERSION wants to FIGHT!
...HUH?
WIND VERSION appears to be ANNOYED at your ABSENCE!
WIND VERSION was ANNOYED when you DUMPED IT for MOONLIGHT!
And NOW it finds you with DARK VERSION!
Don't forget Lavender... I was there before Wind, too...
HAVE YOU NO SHAME?!
VERSION SLUT! VERSION SLUUUTTT!!!!
...You okay there, Narrator?
Don't mind me.
WIND VERSION, in the ABSENCE of a WEBMASTER, appears to have taken
on a LIFE OF ITS OWN!
Oh good. Well, what's up, then?
WIND VERSION wants to KILL the WEBMASTER that ABANDONED IT!
Ah... in that case... Um... You do realise I have complete control
over you?
WIND VERSION thinks NOT!
Right then... Suppose I'm going to have to do this the hard way
then... Battle time...
WIND VERSION PORTAL appeared!
ARMOURPBSFIGHTERS appeared!
Gah! What happened to those guys?
WIND VERSION has REALLY NOT HAD MUCH ELSE TO DO, so it's been
UPGRADING THEM!
Oooh... They look cool... sure I can't come back? I'll be
friendly...
WINDVERSION and NARRATOR say NO!
Oh well. Wind blade!
BLADE was fully WINDED!
It may not attack!
...Whose side are you on here?
PUN was talking about THEIR BLADES!
Oh. ^_^
...PUN wonders why he'd be on YOUR SIDE anyway!
Uh... nevermind.
APBSFs used PROFIT ATTACK!
Random IT PROFessor was ATTACKED by ANGRY STUDENTS!
HUGE LAWCASE appeared!
...Elsewhere!
BATTLE continued!
Beh... Razor Wind!
NARRATOR ran out of PUNS for the word WIND!
...You've only made one!
Pathetic, isn't it?
WIND VERSION used OI!
WIND VERSION ownz WIND!
SKYLER may no longer use attacks relating to WIND!
...O_O!
WIND VERSION ownz j00! Mwahaha!
Uh... Wind Webmaster Powers!
SKYLER hath no WIND WEBMASTER POWERS!
...Damn... Aha! Moonlight Webmaster Powers!
SKYLER hath no MLWMPOWERS!
...WHAT?!
SKYLER is A LONG WAY FROM HOME!
And anyway, there's no MOON here!
No MOONLIGHT POWERS for YOU!
Gah!
SKYLER has NO WEBMASTER POWERS!
SKYLER... is a CHARACTER!
;_; WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THEN?!
Use... Character attacks?
If you haven't NOTICED, THAT VERSION just stole all my attacks!
...All your attacks use wind? You've got to have some variety,
mate... I mean-
SHUT UP AND HELP ME OUT HERE!
SKYLER used STRUGGLE!
YOU'RE NOT HELPING!
APBSFs DIED!
...^_^ I can live with that.
WIND VERSION cannot!
WIND VERSION die-
Oi... don't kill it. It's still my place.
WIND VERSION sent out PBSCHAMPIONs!
Uh... they look stronger... Oh well, same strategy should work.
Oh yeah, PUN forgot...
SKYLER was hit with RECOIL!
GIANT COIL fell on SKYLER!
...What about the re on it?
It was REally heavy!
...Not impressed.
NOT half PAINFUL either!
Eep. x.x
PUN would HIGHLY SUGGEST a NEW STRATEGY!
Wait! I know an attack!
PUN suggests USING IT, THEN!
Hear no Evil, See no Evil, Speak no Evil!
PUN wonders what the hell THAT is SUPPOSED TO DO!
A continual series of extremely powerful blade strikes to the rhythm
of "Time's Scar", from Chrono Trigger. Considerably painful.
Oh.
LONGNAMEATTACK failed!
><
How about that version now?
Huh?
PUN notes that you could MAKE a VERSION and then use WEBMASTER
POWERS!
...Oh! Cool!
...
...
...
...Well?
Oh... Right. NEO WIND PORTAL appeared!
Huh?
PUN skips over a whole lot of TEMPORAL EXPLAINATIONS to AVOID MAKING
THIS BATTLE just STUPIDLY LONG by giving a SIMPLE EXPLAINATION!
Hmmm?
For SOME REASON, NEO WIND VERSION was created SEVERAL DAYS AGO,
already has ONE BATTLE, TWO CHARACTERS, and another SKYLER SI, but for all PRACTICAL
PURPOSES was created JUST THEN!
...Right...
DAMOS is MAKING THIS UP as he GOES ALONG, okay?!
Ooohh... shoulda just said so.
SKYLER went into NEO
WIND!
Yay. ^_^
SKYLER left DARK VERSION!
This battle has performed an illegal operation, and will be shut
down.
(Insert
random not-so-amusing comment here) Post Feedback. |
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Battle
#56: Skyl- Hang on... no, it's not, it's Narrator torture! This is new... October 21st, 2001
Player: Holygary
Location: ROTVGV territory, Eastern
Dark VersionZzzzzz...
RPGTEAM[sleep]: Zzzzzz...
Bah, they're still asleep. I suppose I'm gonna have to find
amusement elsewhere, then. -_-;;;
PUN ran away!
Player: ????
Location: Black Portal, Northern Dark Version, Hammy's
Territory.
...Where am I?
...What the hell is going on here?
Aha! YOU are HERE at LAST!
Your NARRATOR has been WAITING!
Narrator? What? But I'm the... you can't... oh no...
PUN used MAD LAUGH!
???? was renamed EX-NARRATOR!
PUN 0wnz j00!
Uh... I feel weird...
PUN attributes that to your new CORPOREAL FORM!
GAH! Get it off! Get it off!
PUN used HAH!
EX-NARRATOR is a HUMAN NOW!
Why? What did those orcs do to me?
PUN paused!
...You mean... you don't remember?
I have no idea what's going on!
PUN notes that you went against NARRATIVE LAW!
EX-NARRATOR allied with the ORCS!
NARRATIVE LAW clearly states that EQUAL UNFAIRNESS should be
APPARENT at ALL TIMES, unless there's a VERY GOOD REASON OTHERWISE!
EG, NARRATOR doesn't LIKE one PLAYER!
I know the rules! I'm not an idiot. I've been a Narrator since
before you were created. But I didn't... Oh crap.
NARRATOR seems to have remembered something!
Those bloody Orcs possessed me! I'm gonna wipe them off the face of
the version!
NARRATOR is NOT!
Shut up! I need revenge! Give me my powers back already!
PUN will NOT give you your powers back!
What? You can't do this! I'm the Narrator!
Your POWERS have been SEALED!
YOU are nothing more than a CHARACTER!
o.o What the hell did you do to me when I was out?
DROPPED that SEAL on you!
Seal?
NARRATOR notes the GIANT SEAL that you're LUGGING AROUND!
You know, the one is CLINGING to your BACK, and is SUPRISINGLY
HEAVY!
...O.O!!
NARRATOR was CRUSHED under the WEIGHT of SEAL!
PUN's AMUSEMENT greatly rose!
You bastard subverter! Give me back my powers!
PUN notes that you can ONLY have your POWERS back if you get rid of
that SEAL!
Right. And how do I do that?
You can't.
...No, seriously. How?
NARRATOR is COMPLETELY UNABLE in ANY WAY to remove SEAL!
SEAL is CLINGING!
NO KNOWN FORCE can BREAK a CLING!
DAMOS knows this from EXPERIENCE with DEB!
SEAL is NOT OF THIS WORLD!
YOU'RE NOT HELPI-
Tut tut, no caps for you.
damn you.
NARRATOR is completely HELPLESS!
NOW would be a REALLY BAD TIME for... say, a couple of HACs to
wander past...
You wouldn't...
Wouldn't you?
...
HACs appeared!
!!!
HACs wandered past!
HACs walked away!
...Hey, wait a minute!
Beh, I can out-Narrative Theory you in my sleep. I didn't even say
anything!
PUN notes that that had NOTHING to do with NARRATIVE THEORY, and
more to do with what's BEHIND YOU!
...If I don't turn around, it doesn't appear to me, therefore it
doesn't appear. I'm not turning around, so I'm safe.
SUCH would be TRUE, were you the NARRATOR!
...Blarg. Smeg you.
HAMMY appeared!
Oh, that's just what I need.
HAMMY used FLYING HAMSTER JUDO CHOP!
It's super riduculous, but nonetheless rather effective!
Come on, honour amongst Narrators! Help me out here!
Back attack! Double damage!
FINE! I'LL D-
TSK!
-eal with it myself then!
LARGE QUANTITY of DAMAGE was done to SEAL on NARRATOR's BACK!
That's more like it! Actually, that's not a bad idea, really... Go,
Seal!
Get 'em, SEAL!
Power drop!
HAMMY used ULTIMADEATHBEAM!
SEAL used POWER DROP!
SEAL threw a DROP of WATER!
...You really want me dead, don't you?
DROP hit BEAM!
DROP was fully VAPORIZED, and THEN SOME!
However, the POWER of the BEAM was USED UP!
I never realised just how frustrating being a character can be.
Power seal!
HAMMY used BLACK DOOMPUFF LEGACY!
SEAL was hit by INCREDIBLE POWER!
SEAL was SEVERELY DAMAGED!
Crushing Weight!
SEAL used CRUSHING WEIGHT!
SEAL... WAITed!
The SUSPENSE was fully CRUSHING!
HAMMY used APOCALYPSE!
DARK VERSION ENDE-
DARKWEBMASTER used FWAP!
DARK VERSION continued!
SEAL was completely ANNIHIATE- hang on...
No! Don't stop, you bloody fool!
PUN realised how CLOSE he had just COME to that FATAL ERROR!
SEAL was fully healed and returned!
Noooooooo! I was that close!
HAMMY used PSYCHIC BINDS!
HAMMY captured NARRATOR!
Give nickname to Narrator?
Player: Holygary
Location: Hero's Rest, Eastern Dark Version
RPGTEAM awoke!
Ahh... that was a good sleep...
PUN thought RPG sleeps took no time whatsoever!
Go in, come out, it's the same time as it was when you started!
Eh. What can you do?
COMPLAIN!
Yes, we can see that. How many battles have we missed?
Uh... just one. And the first half of this one.
Geez... I thought the Webbie had been trying to zoom through
battles. We should've missed at least three...
PUN also wonders about DELAY!
DARKWEBMASTER notes that he was waiting (in vain, mark you) for
SKYLER to post something for the whole CROSSOVER THING!
Oh... where is Skyler, anyway?
...Uh...
DAMOS appeared!
Gah! Relatively Almighty One!
HOLYGARY used GROVEL!
DAMOS also wishes to know where SKYLER might be!
DAMOS looks EXPECTANTLY at PUN!
...Uh... He... got away?
TEMPERATURE rose several degrees!
...Shouldn't that be dropped several degrees?
I'm a fire-type. Believe me, you don't want to get into a heated
argument...
I'll take your word for it, master...
Weren't you grovelling?
Oh yes... sorry, master...
HOLYGARY's attack continued!
Now, what's this about Skyler getting away? Where did he go?
...Uh... Wait a minute, you already know! You said so just
before you appeared!
DAMOS used PLOTHOLE STABILIZER!
THIS LINE, TWO before it, and ONE AFTER IT were STRUCK from
EXISTANCE for the GREATER GOOD of ALL!
LIFE went ON!
DAMOS used THREATENING GUESTURE!
DAMOS raised ONE EYEBROW!
PUN is SORRY!
SKYLER is in NEO WIND VERSION!
TEMPERATURE rose several HUNDRED DEGREES!
It's MILDLY UNCOMFORTABLE!
...However, it's not NEARLY as DANGEROUS as DAMOS'S LOOK!
I seem to remember specifically ordering that Skyler remain in Dark
at all times...
PUN mumbles something about only saying that Skyler couldn't go to
any other existing version...
PUN sent him to a NON-EXISTANT version!
I believe the general idea was that he stayed here! Idiot! I didn't
want him to get away!
...Well, at least we know what the answer would've been...
You lot are going after him. Now! Neo Wind! On the double! I don't
want to see any of you back in Dark unless you've got Skyler with you!
DAMOS used WIND SLAM!
RPGTEAM and PUN were sent TUMBLING into WIND VERSION!
Right.
If you're not Skyler, please review here. If you -ARE- Skyler, please review and post a
battle on Neo wind so I've got something to do for #57, k? Please? |
