5/5/2K: WARRIOR BATTLE 1: The Maple Tree Strikes Back

Player: Grandpa [no record.]
Darned kids! Why in my day...
GRANDPA runs into TREE!
OW!
TREE is enraged!
Enemy TREE wants to fight!
Well lookit that... must be one of those newfangled fertilizers...
Enemy TREE sent out TREE!
Okay you overgrown stick in the mud! Let’s go!
Go! CANESTICK!
What the!?
GRANDPA is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
OW! Why you... Oh well. I’ll teach you a lesson for running into me! I’m a licensed Senior Citizen!
CANESTICK! Come back!
Go! LICENSE CARD!
What in blazes! How’d it do that?
GRANDPA is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
Hey! Stop that!
Enemy TREE used FALL!
APPLES fell on LICENSE CARD!
LICENSE CARD fainted!
Uh oh... That was my only copy... Okay! Put up your dukes!
Go! DUKES!
Quit that! Come back!
...
Uh... Get over here!
...
Um... Return?
DUKES! Enough!
Stupid things. I guess I’ll send out myself if I said ‘Go me.’
GRANDPA sent out GRANDPA!
Con-sarnit!
Enemy TREE is enraged!
Enemy TREE used FALL!
APPLES fell on GRANDPA!
Con-flabbit! Stupid apples. Take this!
GRANDPA used STICK WHACK!
It’s super effective!
Enemy TREE fainted!
GRANDPA won!
I did? I WON! I’M A MILLIONAIRE!! HA-HEE-HEE-HEE!! I WON! I WON! I WON!
...

5/5/2K: WARRIOR BATTLE 2: Mr. Mime Mimes a Mime

Player: Gogo [no record.]
GOGO is running!
GOGO crashes into TREE!
Ouch! Who put that tree there? Oh wait... It’s a forest...
TREE is angered!
An angry tree?
Enemy TREE wants to fight!
Enemy TREE sends out LEAF!
Okay... I’ll battle it then. I hope this thing works...
Go! MR. MIME!
Enemy LEAF used RAZOR LEAF!
What in the?
GOGO is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
Ouch!
MR. MIME is miming!
MR. MIME is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
MR. MIME: Ouch!
That was interesting...
MR. MIME: That was interesting...
Enemy LEAF used RAZOR LEAF!
Mimic that leaf!
MR. MIME is loafing around!
MR. MIME: Mimic that leaf!
Stop that! Mimic that leaf!
MR. MIME: Stop that! Mimic that leaf!
GET OVER HERE! YOU’RE USELESS!
MR. MIME: GET OVER HERE! YOU’RE USELESS!
COME BACK!
MR. MIME: COME BACK!
Uh... Return?
Enough! MR. MIME!
Okay... I’m using myself from now on!
...
I’m fighting!
...
LET ME FIGHT!
...
Er... go me?
Go! GOGO!
Ugh...
Enemy TREE withdraws LEAF!
Enemy TREE sends out TREE!
Enemy TREE used FALL!
APPLES fell on GOGO’s head!
Ouch!
GOGO is miming!
GOGO used FALL!
APPLES fell on TREE!
TREE used FALL!
TREE fell on GOGO!
GOGO fainted! Use next Pokémon?
Go! MR. MIME...

5/5/2K: WARRIOR BATTLE 3: Give it the Boot!

Player: Glob [no record.]
GLOB is driving!
Woo-hoo!
GLOB realizes he can’t drive!
Huh? But you just said...
I KNOW WHAT I SAID!
Fine. Then what can I use to go fast?
GLOB is riding that boot from Super Mario Brothers 3!
Woo-hoo! I always wanted one of these!
GLOB’s boot runs into a stone wall!
What the? That wasn’t there before!
GLOB falls!
GLOB lands on GRANDPA!
GRANDPA is angered!
Enemy GRANDPA wants to fight!
Okay. I’ll use that boot then.
Go! MARIO BOOT!
Mario Boot?
Enemy GRANDPA sent out GRANDPA!
GRANDPA: Stupid kids! In my day, we didn’t have big mechanical boots to ride into stone walls so we could fall on our elders!
Enemy GRANDPA used RAMBLE!
It’s super effective!
MARIO BOOT fainted! Use next Pokémon?
Pokémon? Okay... I use... me?
Go! GLOB!
Enemy GRANDPA withdrew GRANDPA!
That’s a sight you don’t see everyday...
Enemy GRANDPA sent out LICENSE CARD!
A Senior Citizen’s License Card? Okay... That’s... original...
GLOB used RIP!
It doesn’t effect Enemy LICENSE CARD!
Oh yeah... It’s laminated...
Enemy LICENSE CARD used IDENTIFY!
GLOB is not a Senior Citizen!
Well... That’s... Interesting...
GLOB used BLOWTORCH!
Enemy LICENSE CARD fainted!
Enemy GRANDPA sent out GRANDPA!
Oh no...
GRANDPA used STICK WHACK!
OUCH! Okay geezer, you’re gonna get it!
Go! BIGGLYMUFF!
What in the!? That’s not mine! I don’t even know what it is!
GLOB is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
Ouch! Don’t do that!
Too bad. I’m gonna do it anyway.
GRANDPA is reading his POKéDEX!
BIGGLYMUFF: A HUNGRY BALLOON POKéMON. KNOWN TO EAT PEOPLE WHEN THEY ARE READING THEIR POKéDEX. Weight: 5 lbs. Height: 12 ft, 3 Ľ in. No. 397
GRANDPA: Uh oh.
BIGGLYMUFF used PEOPLE EATER!
GRANDPA fainted!
GLOB won!

5/6/2K: WARRIOR BATTLE 4: Trainer BIGGLYMUFF Wants to Fight

Player: Bigglymuff [no record.]
BIGGLYMUFF is sick of being a wild Pokémon!
Biggly! Biggly Biggly Bigglymuff!
BIGGLYMUFF wants to be a Pokémon Trainer!
Muff!
BIGGLYMUFF ran into TREE!
TREE is angered!
Biggly?
Enemy TREE wants to fight!
Enemy TREE sent out LEAF!
Biggly!
Go! BIGGLYMUFF!
LEAF used RAZOR LEAF!
It’s not very effective...
BIGGLYMUFF used SING!
Bi-gglymuff, Biggl-y-y-y-muff...
Enemy LEAF fell asleep!
Bigglymuff.
BIGGLYMUFF used PLANT EATER!
Enemy LEAF was eaten!
Enemy LEAF fainted!
Enemy TREE sent out APPLE!
Enemy APPLE used BOP!
BIGGLYMUFF was BOPped with apples!
Biggly--!
BIGGLYMUFF used FRUIT EATER!
Enemy APPLE was eaten!
Enemy APPLE fainted!
BIGGLYMUFF was poisoned!
Biggly...muff...
Enemy TREE sent out TREE!
Bigglymuff...
Enemy TREE used FALL!
Enemy TREE fell on BIGGLYMUFF!
BIGGLYMUFF bounced back!
A POKé BALL landed on TREE!
...
...
...!
TREE was captured!
New POKéDEX data will be updated for TREE!
TREE: A TREE POKéMON. KNOWN TO FALL ON OPPONENTS, IT IS VIRTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO DEFEAT WITHOUT ITS ENEMY BEING CRUSHED. Height 15’, Weight 700 lbs, No. 372.
BIGGLYMUFF is now a POKéMON TRAINER!
Biggly!

5/7/2K: WARRIOR BATTLE 5: Hi, I'm Cloud, and I got Flattened by a Tree. (Hi, Cloud...)

Player: Cloud [no record.]
CLOUD is taking a walk!
CLOUD falls down a hole!
Hole? There wasn’t a hole there a minute ago. And who said I fell down it?
CLOUD lands on his hair and the 10 gallons of hair gel in it made him bounce out of the hole!
Yay!
Wild BIGGLYMUFF appeared!
What’s that?
BIGGLYMUFF is a Hungry Balloon Pokémon that eats people as they read their Pokédex.
Pokémon?
Gotta catch ‘em all!
Huh?
Uh... never mind.
A POKé BALL drops from out of the sky and slams into Cloud’s face!
Ouch! What’s this?
A Poké Ball. Didn’t you listen to me?
BIGGLYMUFF is angry!
Enemy BIGGLYMUFF wants to fight!
Enemy BIGGLYMUFF sent out TREE!
You’ve gotta be kidding me...
Gotta catch ‘em all!
I know. I heard you the first time. Well, the best way to kill a tree is to use a SWORD!
Go! SWORD!
What the...!?
CLOUD is confused!
Damn right I am!
It hurt itself in its confusion!... But the hair gel absorbed the shock.
IT!?
IT!
Oh well... Go Ultima Weapon!
...
Go Sword?
SWORD is already out!
Wha?
CLOUD is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!... But the hair gel absorbed the shock again.
I AM NOT AN IT! SWORD, ATTACK!
SWORD used SLASH!
It’s super effective!
Enemy TREE used FALL!
Enemy TREE fell on SWORD!
SWORD fainted! Use next Pokémon?
I don’t have one... I think... But I can catch one! I think...
CLOUD threw POKé BALL!
The trainer blocked the ball! Don’t be a thief! Catch only WILD Pokémon!
The POKé BALL hit CLOUD in the face!
OWW!! Well, I’ll fight then!
Go! CLOUD!
‘Go Cloud’?
CLOUD is con... Oh, what’s the use...
CLOUD used POKE!
CLOUD POKEd Enemy TREE with his hair!
HEY! I DID NOT!
Enemy TREE used FALL!
How’d it get up?
Enemy TREE fell on CLOUD!
CLOUD fainted! Use next Pokémon?