|
|
>> Format |
Battles 81-85. I don't know where Catnip Ethylene's plotline is going at all. DICTATOR ICE: Actually no. DICTATOR ICE: I'm just here to take back the Huger. We can't have the Huger Games without a Huger. DICTATOR ICE: Okay for one thing I'm pretty sure sand would pound DICTATOR ICE: And for another... Go, Death Squad. DICTATOR ICE wants to fight! DICTATOR ICE sent out DEATHSQUAD! Go! HUGER! HUGER sent out FIREWORMS! HIBER: Don't worry I already wrote a less garbage firesnake script. HIBER: Like sixteen years ago. It doesn't crash Enemy DEATHSQUAD used DEATH! Enemy DEATHSQUAD died! HUGER: How impolite, don't you know you're supposed to wait until the fireworms roast you? Rude... DICTATOR ICE: That ... wasn't supposed to happen. Go, StateSec! Enemy DICTATOR ICE sent out STATESEC! FIREWORMS used BURN! Enemy STATESEC was given BURN NOTICE! Enemy STATESEC broke down into CHAOS! DICTATOR ICE: This is not remotely fair. What's next, a snowman? DICTATOR ICE: ... DICTATOR ICE sent out FIRE! DICTATOR ICE: Something like that. If I'm ice, why would I use fire? Enemy FIRE used BURN! FIREWORMS used BURN! It's super effective... At STOKING enemy FIRE! Enemy FIRE's SIZE rose! HUGER: Well they can't do anything else and I'm HUGER: Nope. FIREWORMS enough! Come back! HUGER's had enough! It came back! CATNIP was dragged out! Enemy FIRE used SIZE RISE! Enemy FIRE's SIZE rose! What? Enemy FIRE is evolving! Congratulations! Enemy FIRE evolved into BONFIRE! Wait, that gives me an idea. Ethylene! CATNIP used ETHYLENE! It's super dangerous! ETHYLENE and enemy BONFIRE exploded! Enemy BONFIRE's SIZE greatly rose! What? Enemy BONFIRE is evolving! Congratulations! Enemy BONFIRE evolved into WILDFIRE! WILDFIRE was renamed Wild FIRE! DICTATOR ICE was dragged out! DICTATOR ICE: ... oh shoot. CATNIP used GREAT BALL! Congratulations! Wild FIRE was caught! The enemy's weak to you! Get'm FIRE! Fire defrosted Enemy DICTATOR ICE! What? Enemy DICTATOR ICE is devolving! DICTATOR ICE: ... I'm melting, I'm melting...! Congratulations! Enemy DICTATOR ICE devolved into DICTATOR WATER! DICTATOR WATER ran away! Downhill! STATESEC appeared! STATESEC used COUP! DYSTOPIA broke down into CHAOS! DYSTOPIA fainted! Yes! CATNIP won! COUP RELATED INSTABILITY continues in the background! If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord. This battle took ... too long to fine tune into readiness. I've been wanting to make an Undertale-related battle for a while, not least because Sans and Papyrus allow for messing around with the font. It has a complicated place in my heart and I hope I'm doing it some sort of justice.
MT EBOTT is between ISEKIAN and nearest DIVE! ISEKIAN kept going and crashed! Into TRASH HEAP! ISEKIAN fainted! ... ANIME CRITIC appeared! ANIME CRITIC: Oh! What's that in the trash heap!? (Save me! I'm the hero, I can't die in another world's garbage dump!) (Wait, that'd be a good name for a light novel...) ANIME CRITIC: Nevermind, it's just some isekai trash... ISEKIAN's HOPES greatly fell! ...along with ISEKIAN! FLOWEY appeared! FLOWEY: Howdy! I'm FLOWEY. FLOWEY the FLOWER. FLOWEY: You're new to the UNDERGROUND, aren't you? FLOWEY: Someone ought to teach you how things work around here! FLOWEY wants to fight! FLOWEY: Oh don't mind that. I just want to share some LOVE with you. FLOWEY: You want some LOVE, don't you? Only the pures of love between a generic dark-haired invincible hero and his half-dozen inexplicably passionately devoted haremettes! At least one of which is an animal girl he saved from slavery by buying her! Which totally doesn't normalize or perpetuate the slave trade or anything. FLOWEY: ... uh... uh huh... FLOWEY: Anyway, down here, LOVE is shared in little white "Friendliness Pellets"! FLOWEY: Move around! Get as many as you can! Gotta catch 'em all! FLOWEY: ... Sure, let's go with that... Enemy FLOWEY used BULLET SEED! Hit 5 times! FLOWEY: You idiot. In this world, it's kill or BE killed. FLOWEY: Your SOUL may be useless, but it's still a golden opportunity! FLOWEY: DIE. Enemy FLOWEY used DEATH CIRCLE! It's super symbolic! ... but, it failed! FIREBALL appeared! FIREBALL was renamed HIBER! HIBER: ... HIBER: ... Well, I guess I was gonna until you mentioned it... HIBER: But actually I just came here to mess with Flowey. You only exist so I can send up common isekai tropes. ISEKIAN fainted! HIBER: But all that talk about "LOVE" and "Friendliness Pellets" was super fake sounding. Do you actually get anyone with that? FLOWEY used DIG! FLOWEY went underground! HIBER: No. Can't escape! HIBER used DIG! FLOWEY was dragged out! FLOWEY used RESET! It didn't affect FLOWEY! It doesn't affect HIBER! HIBER: ... Sorry, I'm still determined to see HIBER: And that's a lot more Determination than you'll ever have. HIBER: Maybe if you start Marigold Version and outlast me... HIBER: Anyway, more to the point, this world is going to change, and fast. We're way off the rails now-- ISEKIAN used POKé BALL! HIBER: Wait, what- HIBER: ... Okay then. I guess him trying to reset must've affected If you're not blatantly biased in my favor, this must mean this is one of those RPGs where the heroes beat up God or the author or whatever in the end. ...So, I'm going to defeat you! HIBER: ... it really isn't. HIBER: ... So what would I say if it wasn't!? Oooor... You could be me! HIBER: ... you ... you know there are stories other than those two extremes, right?... HIBER: Also, that's bad writing... HIBER: And by that you mean blatant power and interpersonal success fantasies that provide nothing but escapism... HIBER: ... HIBER: To gain perspective on the universe? To understand aspects of the world you don't? To better understand the human condition? To be entertained?! HIBER: Besides, there's just as much important about the writing as about the reading. The power of expression! HIBER: ... HIBER: You know, I think I can feel my brain cells rotting just talking to you. Ciao! HIBER ran away! ISEKIAN ... won!? Wild WASHBASIN fell on ISEKIAN! If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord. There are a number of trees that really do want to fight and the Manchineel is DAY is SUNNY! OCEAN used SPARKLE! It's super pretty! To be honest, I wonder what the catch is. Usually there is one... TREE wants to fight! ... why does it have a red "X" painted on it? TREE was renamed MANCHINEEL! GOOGLE POKéDEX: Although superficially sweet, the fruit of the MANCHINEEL is poisonous, as is every other part of the tree. GOOGLE POKéDEX: Even a single drop of rain mixed with its sap can cause skin to blister. Enemy MANCHINEEL sent out LEAF! Go! SCYTHER! Enemy LEAF used POISON RAIN! It's super effective! Enemy MANCHINEEL's POISON is that BAD! And G1 games had some dubious TYPE matchups. SCYTHER was BADly POISONed! SCYTHER used CUT! SCYTHER instantly cut enemy LEAF in half! Enemy LEAF's POISON BODY! SCYTHER's hurt by poison! SCYTHER fainted! Enemy MANCHINEEL sent out MANCHINEEL! Go, Ax! The enemy's incredibly toxic! Get'm AX! Enemy MANCHINEEL used TOXIC! Enemy MANCHINEEL started up ONLINE MP in CALLLEAGUEOFRANT! It's super toxic! AX used HACK! AX HACKed in enemy MANCHINEEL's MATCH! Enemy MANCHINEEL's MATCH's TOXICity greatly rose! Enemy MANCHINEEL was poisoned! Enemy MANCHINEEL is angry! Enemy MANCHINEEL used FALL! POISON SAP fell on AX! It's super effective! AX was badly corroded! AX was SAPped! SAP sapped AX! AX fainted! I didn't want to have to use this. Go, Agricultural Flamethrower! Burn it! The enemy's incredibly toxic! Get'm AGFLAMTHRO! AGFLAMTHRO used BURN! It's super effective! Enemy MANCHINEEL was badly BURNed! Enemy MANCHINEEL used DEATH APPLE! It's super effective! Yes! AGFLAMTHRO fell into ENCHANTED SLEEP! ... Also, AGFLAMTHRO was badly poisoned! AGFLAMTHRO fainted! Enemy MANCHINEEL's hurt by poison! Enemy MANCHINEEL's hurt by the burn! Enemy MANCHINEEL fainted! Enemy MANCHINEEL used FINAL ATTACK: POISON SMOKE! It's super toxic! AX CRAIG was badly poisoned! AX CRAIG's hurt by poison! AX CRAIG fainted. Use next Pokémon? If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord. I'm sure everyone these days knows how the Missingno. glitch actually worked. But all too often it's forgotten that it starts with that old man up in northern Viridian... Who's quite an unusual NPC himself. OLD MAN woke up! This road's private property! Don't think about using it while I'm not around! TRAINER: ... You are literally laying on the only road from Viridian to Pewter. ... You can't cut through mine! GRANDDAUGHTER appeared! GRANDDAUGHTER: I'm sorry. He hasn't had his coffee yet! GRANDDAUGHTER: Grampa, come on... GRANDDAUGHTER used COFFEE! OAK: GRANDDAUGHTER! Now is not the time to use that! TRAINER: That ... looks like more than needing coffee... GRANDDAUGHTER: Okay you're right. It absolutely is more than that and it's tearing our family up. GRANDDAUGHTER: Nintendo won't even let us talk about it in the US release. It's bad though. GRANDDAUGHTER: Please just come back later... TRAINER: ... Uhhhhh. TRAINER ran away! GRANDDAUGHTER: Grampa, will you please come inside and have your coffee...? You're- OAK: Wonderful! OAK slipped OLD MAN $20! OAK: Thanks, OLD MAN. These trainers are always in such a rush they forget their POKéDEXes. GRANDDAUGHTER: ... Wait, what the here!? TRAINER: ... uhh... TRAINER: Uhh, no, I don't want any trouble- I'll show you how! ███████ was renamed TRAINER! TRAINER was renamed OLD MAN! Wild WEEDLE appeared! ► ITEM ► POKé BALL OLD MAN used POKé BALL! Congratulations! Wild WEEDLE was caught! OLD MAN was renamed TRAINER! First, you need to weaken the target POKéMON. TRAINER: ... okay.. Uh... Why did I just turn into you for a moment. TRAINER: Uhh... yeah... I just came from there, I was gonna see if I couldn't get into Viridian Gym... TRAINER: ... uhhh... TRAINER sent out DODUO! DODUO used FLY! TRAINER flew away! MISSING NO. appeared! MISSING NO. slipped OLD MAN $50! ... POTIONS!? OLD MAN ... Won? Sure, let's go with that... If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord. I'm going somewhere with this and it may or may not make sense in context later. We're continuing to report on strange and unusual activity relating to the Network Portals. Wild NIDORAN appeared! Wild NIDORAN: Nido nido! Nidoran ran ra ni doni! Ni ra-ni rani doran! Wild NIDORAN: Ran do nid doni ran! Wild NIDORAN: Do! Nidoran ran ran ran! Wild NIDORAN: Nidoran do ran-ran do! Rani! HIBER: Darn kids, get off my lawn, I'm trying to write!! HIBER used BOOT TOSS! HIBER is out of usable BOOTs! HIBER's attack failed! NEWSNED and Wild NIDORAN ran away! Time: Pirate, what can you tell us about the unidentified portal that appeared at the site of the Land of the Dead portal? PIRATE: Well y'see. There be two portals to Davy Jones's Locker there. PIRATE: One be in ye Mount Winter. Ye Flying Dutchman, cross me heart, dives into it on a regular basis on her cursed travels. PIRATE: But ye return portal, that be a bit different, y'see. That only opens once every two score and ten battles. PIRATE: And only for one person. PIRATE: But ye said ye Nidoran heard many footsteps, and it be not yet battle fivescore. PIRATE: I conclude to ye it were not a portal to Davy Jones's Locker neither. PIRATE: I have a bootleg copy of ye Necronomicon. PIRATE shows BOOTLEG NECRONOMICON! BOOTLEG NECRONOMICON is made out of BOOT and LEG! Enemy MAGNAMITE appeared! Enemy MAGNAMITE wants to fight! MAGNAMITE! Enemy MAGNAMITE used SHOCK STOMP! PIRATE used DODGE ROLL! Enemy MAGNAMITE's attack missed! Go! Camera! Ally PIRATE is trying to send out PIRATESHIP! But, STUDIO is too small for PIRATESHIP! Ally PIRATE sent out instead, CDBURNER! PIRATE: Me landlubber laddie, I was going to bootleg ye broadcasts from ye moment I stepped inside. Camera! Snap! CAMERA used SNAP! CAMERA's LENS HOLDER snapped! CAMERA's ACCURACY greatly fell! CAMERA fainted! Ally CDBURNER used BURN! It's super effective! Enemy MAGNAMITE was burned! Enemy MAGNAMITE's hurt by the burn! Enemy MAGNAMITE used LASER BEAM! Enemy MAGNAMITE BEAMed CDBURNER's LASERs! CDBURNER fainted! Go! Microphone! Use Interview! The enemy's a giant robot cable insect thing! Get'm MICROPHONE! Ally PIRATE sent out CANNON! Ally CANNON is loading! Ally CANNON will be loaded in 10 lines! MICROPHONE used INTERVIEW! MAGNAMITE: WELL< WHAT I REALLY WANT IN LIFE IS >>> TO KILL ASTRO BOY> MAGNAMITE: WAIT< THAT DOESN"T SEEM RIGHT> MAGNAMITE: I MEAN< TO KILL YOU>>>? MAGNAMITE: YOU KNOW THINGS YOU SHOULDN"T AND ARE LOOKING INTO THINGS YOU SHOULDN"T. MAGNAMITE: THAT PORTAL ISN"T TO BE MESS WI__ Ally CANNON used AP SHOT! It's super effective! Critical hit! Enemy MAGNAMITE fainted! I feel like we missed out on a major scoop or plot point, but at the same time, my studio's saved, so I can't exactly complain. NEWSNED won! PIRATE won! Magnamite is in reference to "Astro Boy: Omega Factor". |