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Battles 31-35 are greatly and inevitably influenced by the first fanfic, Rocket Ascension, and deal with its fallout.

<< Older | FF1 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | Newer >>


PokéBattles Foxfire: The First Fanfic

Rocket Ascension

>> Read Here <<


Ramifications of the fic: Team Rocket is getting stronger. Albeit not as fast as they'd like, still relevant. The TCG references here were added in at the last minute, and no, not all of this battle makes sense.

Battle 31: Rocket Repercussions #1 12/16/2021
Setting: Game 50% / Anime 40% / TCG 10%
Player: Kate Rainer, Ace Trainer [1-0-0] Last Battle: Win vs. Vulpix (Battle #28)


ROCKET GRUNT wants to fight!
You wanna fight then you got it! A real trainer never backs down from a battle!
Right, I'll go easy on you at first. Totally not grinding experience. Go, Nidoran!

Go! NIDORAN♂!
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT sent out RATICLAW!
What in Mew's name is that.
GOOGLE POKéDEX: RATICLAW, the Claw Rat POKéGOD. ERROR: POKéGODs do not exist.
GOOGLE POKéDEX: ERROR. ERROR. ERROR. ERROR.
GOOGLE POKéDEX kept going and crashed!
Ah dang, gotta reboot.
Enemy RATICLAW used CLAW!
Critical hit!
NIDORAN♂ fainted!
Oh wow that's strong. Time to get serious. Go, Magmar!
Go! MAGMAR!
Magmar, Fire Punch!
MAGMAR used FIRE PUNCH!
MAGMAR gave enemy RATICLAW a glass of PUNCH!
Enemy RATICLAW drank the PUNCH!
PUNCH was ON FIRE!
Enemy RATICLAW fainted!
... *Wince*
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT sent out HAKKING!
It looks like a Weezing with more heads and sunglasses.
Enemy HAKKING used HAKK!
HAKKING: I'm in.
Enemy HAKKING is IN!
In? In where?
... MAGMAR!
Enemy HAKKING was badly burned!
Enemy HAKKING fainted!
MAGMAR was badly poisoned!
MAGMAR fainted!
Wow, just straight up telefragged...
Right. Go, Electabuzz!

Go! ELECTABUZZ!
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT sent out RAINER!
. . . papa?
RAINER: DAUGHTER...?
ELECTABUZZ facefaulted!
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT is confused!
It hurt itself in its confusion!
Papa, why are you working with Team Rocket?
RAINER: THIS IS MY LIFE NOW.
Enemy RAINER used RAIN!
It started raining!
Sorry, papa.
Electabuzz. We need to win this for Papa's sake. Thunderbolt!

ELECTABUZZ used THUNDERBOLT!
THUNDER rolled in!
ELECTABUZZ bolted!
ELECTABUZZ ran away!
Well heckaroonie, that's actually all I've got. Uhhh... Go, me?
IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK: KATE! Now is not the time to use that!
Wait, what?!
KATE is out of usable POKéMON!
KATE blacked out!

If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord.


I have three battles or so buffered but I realized it's Little Christmas Eve so I decided to throw together a Christmas themed one. Even if it's, well, a PokéBattles Christmas. There's a reason we usually only do Halloween in this format, but I wanted to have Santa fight Giovanni and now we're all stuck with it.

Battle 32: Holiday Bash 2021 12/23/2021
Location: North Pole
Player: Santa Claus [no record]


Ho ho ho. Christmas comes in two days. The North Pole is always busy this time of year...
GIOVANNI appeared!
Ho ho ho. You should be careful. This is a stocking hat only zone.
GIOVANNI gave WISH LIST!
Huh, what's this...
SANTA used READ!
LIST was fully READ!
It contained HIGH EXPLOSIVES and RARE POKéMON!
Oh. I know you. You're deep on the Naughty List.
Common misconception: I only give out coal to children on the Naughty List. I don't give out anything more flammable or explosive.
Wonder where that started. Almighty knows they ask.

GIOVANNI is angry!
Well, I have elves to supervise, reindeer to tend and a route to plan. I don't know how you got up here but I wish you a safe trip home and a happy Christmas.
GIOVANNI wants to fight!
...That isn't a good idea, but all right. Go, Elf!
SANTA sent out ELF!
Enemy GIOVANNI sent out NIDOGOD!
!!
Enemy NIDOGOD used TOXIC INFECTION!
ELF was INFECTED with TOXICS!
What? ELF is evolving!
ELF evolved into INFECTED ELF!
INFECTED ELF ran off to ECLIPSE VERSION!
... Nutmeg.
Go, Sleigh!

Do it! SLEIGH!
I've had to fine tune this beauty. Every year there are more stockings to fill than the last!
SLEIGH used ROCKET BOOSTERS!
Nearby TEAM ROCKET allies were fully BOOSTED!
Enemy NIDOGOD was sent into low orbit!
It doesn't affect GIOVANNI!
You see? Without this speed, I'd have no chance of making all the houses in the world in one night.
Enemy GIOVANNI is angry!
Enemy GIOVANNI sent out NIDOGODESS!
Enemy NIDOGODESS used THUNDER RAGE!
A thunderstorm rages!
SLEIGH was caught in the turbulence!
SLEIGH kept going and crashed!
... Into ally WORKSHOP!
SLEIGH fainted!
Ally WORKSHOP fainted!
... That's not good. You sir are getting nothing but burning coals in your stocking.
Go, Krampus!

The enemy's a demigod! Get'm! KRAMPUS!
Krampus, just use your switch at first. It's not as strong as it looks.
KRAMPUS used SWITCH!
Enemy NIDOGODESS was switched out!
Enemy GIOVANNI sent out RUIN!
My word what have you done to that Rhyhorn.
Enemy RUIN used RUIN!
KRAMPUS' SWITCH was fully RUINED!
KRAMPUS is angry!
KRAMPUS used HELL BUCKET!
No, don't--
UNDEAD RSACi CLOUD used LIGHTNING BOLT!
KRAMPUS fainted!
--I was afraid of that. Too soon!
I have one resort! Go, O Christmas Tree!

SANTA sent out XMASTREE!
XMASTREE used FALL!
ORNAMENTS fell on enemy RUIN!
It's super effective!
That's it!
Enemy RUIN used RUIN!
XMASTREE's XMASSPIRIT!
It doesn't affect XMASTREE!
That's right! As long as the spirit of Christmas is there, you can't win!
XMASTREE used STAR TOSS!
Enemy RUIN was impaled with STAR SHAPED ORNAMENT!
Enemy RUIN fainted!
GIOVANNI sent out NIDOGODESS!
Enemy NIDOGOD appeared!
... isn't he in orbit somewhere.
Yes!
Enemy NIDOGOD kept going and crashed!
... Into XMASTREE!
XMASTREE fainted!
Well, nutmeg.
Its attack continues!
Enemy NIDOGOD kept going and crashed!
... Into NIDOGODESS!
NIDOGOD fainted!
NIDOGODESS fainted!
Enemy GIOVANNI sent out DUGCHORUS!
Oh no, what do I even have left...
Rudolph?

RUDOLPH is playing REINDEER GAMES!
There's no will to fight!
Nutmeg... Jinx?
JINX is not here!
JINX was chased off by UNDEAD RSACi CLOUD!
Nutmeg with rum... Go, me!?
IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK: SANTA! Now is not the time to use that!
!?!?!?!
SANTA is out of usable POKéMON!
SANTA blacked out!

Location: Hiber's Lair, Mt. Winter Cave
Player: Hiber


NARRATOR is confused!
CHRISTMAS EPISODE ended unhappily!?
Well, following all of that, a ragtag band of children and holiday misfits went on an adventure to save Santa Claus, negotiating their way past the Deal Miser and Chaos Miser in the process... Only to return to find that without Santa's magic there, the Arctic sea ice had melted, leading Santa to set up shop on the South Pole from then on.
NARRATOR thinks THAT would have been a better battle!
Well, sure -- but it's even better as an offscreen noodle incident. And potential Phantom Version idea seed fodder, if we ever start getting submissions for Phantom Version anyway.
We've also just passed 12,000 views, and I want to thank all of you for that. Moreover, happy Christmas, and happy holidays, and happy New Year. There'll be one more battle before 2022, so keep your eyes open.

BATTLE ran away!

If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord.


The plot thickens and Steve returns.

Battle 33: Rocket Repercussions #3 12/30/2021
Setting: Game 50% / Reality 30% / Star Wars 20%
Player: Steve "Darksteve" Simmons [1-2-0] Last Battle: Loss vs. Missing No. (#25)


Sigh. You would think that phenomenal Dark Side powers would make a guy's life change somehow.
Buuut it's still just more of the same, day in, day out.
...Or it was until a Missing No. ate my job site

ROCKET GRUNT appeared!
Oooh, hot babe.
Hey, you doing anything later? Wanna go get dinner with me?

DARKSTEVE used HIT ON!
It's not very effective...
ROCKET GRUNT wants to fight!
...Ehh?!
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT sent out GRIMER!
... Well if it's a battle you want it's a fight you'll get! Go, Cloyster!
Go! CLOYSTER!
Enemy GRIMER used GRIME!
CLOYSTER was fully GRIMED!
It doesn't affect CLOYSTER!
You know oysters are great at filtering water, right? That won't work.
Cloyster use Filter!

CLOYSTER used FILTER!
Enemy GRIMER was stripped of GRIME!
What? Enemy GRIMER is devolving!
Congratulations! Enemy GRIMER devolved into R!
Enemy R was added to TEAM ROCKET UNIFORM SUPPLIES!
Enemy R ran away!
Niiiice.
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT sent out SPOOKY!
... Okay now that thing's just scary. What is it?
DARKSTEVE used GOOGLE POKéDEX!
GOOGLE POKéDEX: SPOOKY. The GHOST POKéGOD. It's so terrifying I'm not staying here with you!
GOOGLE POKéDEX ran away!
I had no idea those could run away.
Cloyster, use Water Gun!

CLOYSTER's too scared to move!
SPOOKY: Go away... Go away...
Fine, I'll just use my Silph Scope.
IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK: STEVE! Now is not the time to use that!
Wh--
Then I'll just return Cloyster and send myself out. The Dark Side is strong against this one.

IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK: STEVE! Now is not the time to do that!
Who the heck says!?
I say it's the perfect time to do it!

IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK: STEVE! Now is not the time to say that!
Heck this, Force Choke.
STEVE used FORCE CHOKE!
IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK: STEVE! Now is not the -- ggck!
IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK was FORCED to CHOKE on WORDS!
IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK is silenced! It may not speak!
IMPOSTER PROFESSOR OAK ran away!
That deals with that... Cloyster return!
CLOYSTER enough! Come back!
The enemy's terrifying! Go! DARKSTEVE!
Enemy SPOOKY used SPOOK!
It doesn't affect DARKSTEVE!
Ha. You want scary, try some of our clients...
DARKSTEVE used DARK HUMOR!
Enemy SPOOKY was sprayed with DARK HUMOURS!
It's super effective!
Enemy SPOOKY fainted!
Right, what next...
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT sent out SMOKE BOMB!
Enemy SMOKE BOMB used SMOKESCREEN!
Enemy ROCKET GRUNT ran away!
I'll take it that's a no on the date then.

If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord.


The return of both Harry Potter and Garry Kasparov. Gerry is still not returning. This has nothing to do with the ongoing Rocket plot arc because I can have as many plots going on at once as I want.

Battle 34: Harry and Garry 1/6/2022
Location: Ungerground Third Floor Corridor
Player: Harry Potter [1-1-0] Last Battle: Loss vs. Vulpix (T2R1)


Whew, those keys were vicious. What's next?
CHESSBOARD appeared!
That's the biggest Wizard's Chessboard I've ever seen.
KASPAROV appeared!
KASPAROV: Get your own giant chessboard, I already caught this one.
Oh, we don't want the chessboard! We just need to stop Snape from getting the Philosopher's Sorcerer's Stone.
KASPAROV: Oh, you mean that man with the turban? I caught him too!
KASPAROV: And you're next.
KASPAROV wants to fight!
Oh... Oh no.
Enemy KASPAROV sent out CHESSBOARD!
BLACKPCS joined enemy KASPAROV!
If it's chess... Go, Ron!
GO! RONWEASLEY!
WHITEPCS joined RONWEASLEY!
Ron, use your chess skills!
RONWEASLEY used CHESS SKILLS!
It doesn't affect enemy KASPAROV!
HERMIONE: Wait! Harry! That's world champion Garry Kasparov! Whatever you do --
Enemy KASPAROV used CHECKMATE!
It's super effective!
Critical hit!
A one-hit KO!
RONWEASLEY fainted!
Ally WHITEPCS fainted!
HERMIONE: -- Don't ... Play ... Chess with him.
A little late!
All right, go Hermione!

The enemy's godly at chess! Go! HERMIONE!
Hermione, you know about this guy, right?
HERMIONE used KNOWITALL!
HERMIONE: Garry Kasparov is the undisputed strongest chess player in the world. But I don't know what he's doing down here!
HERMIONE's attack missed!
KASPAROV: Not since the '90s I'm afraid. You're not in Oklahoma either anymore, Toto.
HERMIONE: Wait, what?!
HERMIONE was hit with recoil!
It's super effective!
KASPAROV: That red text, haven't you noticed it?
KASPAROV: That booming voice that announces our actions and warps their results.
KASPAROV: It's been over 20 years. It's not even close to the '90s anymore.
KASPAROV: But then again, it'll always be the '90s in our hearts and souls, won't it, Narrator? Webmaster, whoever you are?
Enemy KASPAROV used TRUTH BOMB!
TRUTH exploded on HERMIONE!
It's super effective!
HERMIONE fainted!
Oh, no... Go, me?!
The enemy's a terrifying POKéBATTLES running gag! Go! HPOTTER!
Enemy KASPAROV used CONGLOMERATE!
What? Enemy BLACKPCS is evolving!
Enemy BLACKPCS evolved into GIGACHESSTRON!
Holy mother of Merlin what is that.
Uhh... Wingardium Leviosa!

HPOTTER used WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA!
Enemy GIGACHESSTRON flew up high!
Enemy GIGACHESSTRON greatly fell!
...on KASPAROV!
A critical hit!
It's super effective!
Enemy KASPAROV fainted!
... Wait, that actually worked!?
YES!
It doesn't affect enemy GIGACHESSTRON!
Enemy GIGACHESSTRON is angry!
... Okay it's time to get out of here.
HPOTTER ran away!

If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord.


The return of Malkavian. He's absolutely a fishmalk but he's also still a vampire. I think I forgot to have him actually slap anyone around with a fish this battle. Next time.

Battle 35: Fish and Ships 1/13/2022
Setting: Tabletop 50% / Cinema 30% / Game 20%
Player: Malkavian [0-1-0] Last Battle: Loss vs. Hiber (#19)


I object strenuously to the outcome of the last encounter of this nature in which I was involved!
Not even a chance I was given!

NARRATOR is impressed that MALKAVIAN was not SNAPPED IN HALF!
To the contrary I most certainly was!
I'm still a vampire. I got better.

BUCCANEER appeared!
I say, that man looks most unpleasant.
BUCCANEER wants to RAID, PILLAGE, PLUNDER, and PILFER!
Most unpleasant indeed. But what does this have to do with me.
BUCCANEER wants to fight!
But of course, how predictable.
Go, Barrier'd!

GO! MR. MIME!
Enemy BUCCANEER sent out LONG NINES!
Barrier'd, use Double-Slap!
MR. MIME used DOUBLESLAP!
MR. MIME slapped LONG NINES around a bit with a large trout!
MR. MIME slapped LONG NINES around a bit with a large trout!
It's not very effective...
Enemy LONG NINES used CASE SHOT!
Enemy LONG NINES shot MR. MIME with a COURT CASE!
Hm, let me see about that.
Assault with a deadly fish? ... How absurd, its continued survival shows it was less than deadly.
Now, Barrier'd, use Barrier!

MR. MIME used instead, MIME!
Enemy LONG NINES was fully MIMED!
What? Enemy LONG NINES is evolving!
Enemy LONG NINES evolved into LONG MIMES!
Ha. Now, watch. Lo, what do mimes have to do with a pirate of the high sea!?
It would seem nothing. So go heighten your C and sightseeing elsewhere!

Enemy LONG MIMES agrees!
Enemy LONG MIMES ran away!
Ah, sarcasm.
Enemy BUCCANEER is angry!
Enemy BUCCANEER sent out ANCHOR!
Big!
But the bigger they are, the deeper they sink.

Enemy ANCHOR used SINK!
MR. MIME sank...
...into DEPRESSION!
There's no will to fight!
MR. MIME fainted!
All the barrier'ds in the world can't hold out depression, it's true...
...But providing zero-down-payment mental illness to people is my schtick.

MALKAVIAN is angry!
MALKAVIAN sent out MALKAVIAN!
You. You look rich in iron.
MALKAVIAN used BLOOD DRAIN!
It doesn't affect enemy ANCHOR!
MALKAVIAN was hit with recoil!
...My teeth! You're worse than that windmill giant!
NARRATOR's not sure what MALKAVIAN expected, biting LARGE HEAVY METAL OBJECT!
Enemy ANCHOR used ANCHOR!
MALKAVIAN was fully ANCHORED!
Grrrr. But I know what metal is weak against!
The same thing we're all weak against.
Dementation: Fire Voice!

MALKAVIAN used FIRE VOICE!
MALKAVIAN's VOICE is on FIRE!
... This was the worst idea in the history of ideas
It's super effective!
Critical hit!
Enemy ANCHOR fainted!
AAAAAAAAA
MALKAVIAN used ROT... ROTSHR... RöTSK... FLIP OUT!
MALKAVIAN flipped out!
MALKAVIAN did a BACKFLIP OUT of ARENA!
MALKAVIAN landed in OCEAN!

Player: Buccaneer [lookup]

Yo ho ho. This was a bad idea. We be outmatched.
Already the guns have run and the anchor's on the melt.
Raise the anchor and run up the sails, make ready to sail!

Return, ANCHOR!
Go! SAILS!
Full sail!
SAILS used FULL!
It's not very effective...
We're running with ye wind, aren't we?!
SAILS used RUN WITH WIND!
Ally WIND ran away!
Can't escape!
Enemy MALKAVIAN is swimming towards you!
...Yo ho. Try a different tack!
SAILS used TACK!
SAILS threw TACKS at enemy MALKAVIAN!
Enemy MALKAVIAN is TACKY!
It's not very effective...
Enemy MALKAVIAN reached SHIP!
Enemy MALKAVIAN is climbing towards you!
Drop the anchor on him!
There's no will to fight!
Enemy MALKAVIAN is walking towards you!
Enemy MALKAVIAN needs blood!
Drop sails, go me saber!
SAILS enough! Come back!
The enemy's a hungry vampire! Go, SABER!
Enemy MALKAVIAN used BLOOD BOOST!
Enemy MALKAVIAN used BEND!
SABER has THE BENDS!
SABER fainted!
Enemy MALKAVIAN needs blood, badly!
Go, um... What have I got left?
BUCCANEER sent out BUCCANEER!
Ah.
...Parlay?

BUCCANEER used PARLAY!
It's super effective!

Player: Malkavian

Parlay? Of course. It's one of the oldest and most valid traditions!
Enemy BUCCANEER is amazed that worked!
Enemy BUCCANEER is relieved!
... However, it falls on the one who called a parlay to provide refreshments and hospitality.
I hate to impose, but I've been fighting for over a hundred lines now and I'm dreadfully thirsty.

MALKAVIAN used BLOOD DRAIN!
Critical hit!
Enemy BUCCANEER fainted!
Now, where were we...
Oh, he's having a nap. Fine, we can parlay at a later time.

MALKAVIAN won!

If you enjoyed the battle, you can send feedback to the site email or discuss on the community Discord.


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